Halifax Film Stuff (and TV)

Drunk and On Drugs Happy Funtime Hour - Where Art Thoust

2011-05-18T15:22:00.002-03:00

Hi Folks, We actually had someone answer some questions posed in our last blog post. "We are family, I got all my sisters -" (ed. Get on with it, I have to go out into the sun before the recapture or whatever it is on Saturday)

Apparently the "Drunk and On Drugs Happy Funtime Hour" a new series from the Trailer Park Boys has not shown up on Showcase as originally scheduled. Frank magazine opined that it was a potato too hot (ed. offensive, racist, sexist, etc.ist) and weren't going to show it. But I was e-mailed that it was being "burned off" on another Showcase/Global network perhaps higher in the Tiers.

No trace of it on the Showcase website, (ed. somebody should really update that thing with, I don't know, Current Information!) There is a facebook page set up and in response to the question, the keepers responded that it may be shown in June/July. We'll keep on top of this hot potato.

Say I never got a response to my query for box office numbers from my last post from telefilm. Better e-mail them again. They're probably busy watching top-notch filims.

My What a Lovely Quarter

2011-03-25T21:33:00.007-03:00

So there's a whole bunch of stuff happening RIGHT NOW! My editor for today and everyday is Lunchmeat Harold (ed. Howdy).

So Picnicface started shooting their series today. Seems like yesterday these kids were shooting 8mm films of themselves goofing around and now here they are making funny on The Comedy Network. (ed. where comedy goes to die?). But these kids are smart and funny (ed. You're sure they're on The Comedy Channel?) and young enough to - GO TO THE STATES! GO RUN NOW, WHILE YOU HAVE A CHANCE!!!

Coincidentilly, the "Upfronts" are happening in L.A. This is where the U.S. networks invite Canadian networks to come on down, party like it's 1999 and buy your self some good ole Yankee TV. "

Have some more champagne, Yeeehaaaa. Quick CTV, Global's looking this way. This show rat here may be this year's "Modern Love". Oh, bad example, but you should buy it so no one else in Canader will have it. You buy this and we'll throw in a half-season of a Paul Reiser show. He's very popular, sort of like an American version of, um, oh right you ain't got no TV stars up there. Is your'all television in color yet?" (ed. ooo, left out the "u" . Good one).

Other than that there's Wipeout Canada (ed. shouldn't that have "TV Industry" on the end of it?) airing on TVTropolis which is basically the American Wipeout made with your tax dollars.

Speaking of PicnicFace, where's their movie? It was shot about a year ago and no sign yet. And where's producer Jay Dahl's other film the monster one? That was shot like three years ago. And Paul Kimball's "Eternal Kiss"?

Speaking of Canadian films, I have not seen any reviews for Whirlygig, Chaz Thorne's recent film. (ed. Well, there was The Coast - oh yeah, nevermind). Apparently it was held over for a second week. That's major for a Canadian Film. Has it stayed for a third week? Is it any good? (ed. this matters because...?) How much money did it take in? In fact how much money did Hobo With a Shotgun take in? Maybe I'll just go ask Telefilm. Hang on, brb.

" Hi Telefilm, how are you? I'm good.

I write a blog that reports on film and television in Canada and more specifically, Halifax. I understand that Telefilm invested in several local features including "Whirlygig" and "Hobo With a Shotgun". I'm wondering if you could send me any statistics you have on box office dollars for these two films. Oh, and "The Corridor" too.

Also, "Gunless".

Thank you for your time."

There, just interested. We'll just wait for them to send those numbers back to me.

Oh and speaking of numbers, it looks like production or whatever is gradually moving from Toronto to Halifax by the appropriately named Halifax Film Company (Full disclosure, the writer owns 1000 shares of said halifax - I mean DHX- shares.(ed.Sounds like an awesome bike!)

I think a lot of it has to do with FilmNS taking the production cap off the NS tax credit. Because animation is so labour intensive, it makes up most of the cost of a TV show but the 25% production cap always limited how much a company could claim. Now we can claim 50% of all the labour which will be a pretty penny indeed. (ed. FYI Nova Scotia's the closest thing we have to Asia). Also they've made the residency requirements easier (ed. i.e. vaguer) so anybody moving here to work, who's living here now, who has a parent living (ed. or deceased) here, once saw a postcard of Nova Scotia or drank a Keith's beer is now considered a resident. The beauty part of this is that previously if DHX needed money to produce a show, it had to go cap in gown (ed. that's "hand") to FilmNS, fill out a form and submit an application with "othes". And there was the sometime chance that the province ran out of money. And they would have been "partners" with the province and share any potential revenue (ed. See "Coming to America"). Opening up the Tax Credits makes like so much easier and pradictable and moneyful. And it's absolutely unlimited with no one over their should watching them spend "their" money (ed. Suck that Department of Finance!)

So I'm going to close now but there are still so many unanswered questions that i won't go on and on and on - (ed. Got it) about. I'll just put them in question form.

- How many films are currently shooting in the Shelburne studios?
- Where's the new TPB TV series? Frank magazine said some lss than complementary things about the show a while back. It was shot last spring but has yet to be shown on Showcase.

Finally, a quick shoutout to FilmNS CEO Ann MacKenzie and staff who are currently working for you and me on the beaches of Cannes. The province will surely benefit from their presence there because...um, well, they show films, it's not really a place to pitch locations, but I'm sure it's money well spent.

Goodnight and stay out of the rain.

Oh and if anybody can give me an honest review of the aforementioned films please do.

This film festival

Hobo With a Shotgun - Embarrassing ?

2011-03-14T10:11:00.005-03:00

Dear Friends as I write this something amazing is happening in this country.

Hi, I'm Stuart Sutcliffe the 4th, the 18th Beatle. (ed. Not!. Hi I'm Bev Oda) Not.

Anyway, helping me blog tonight is the always breathing Lunchmeat Harold. (ed. Howdy)

The amazing thing that's happening in this great land of ours is that a Canadian movie is opening nationwide and people are actually either going to see it or looking forward to seeing it. (ed. Going Down the Road? Whirleygig?)

Hobo With a Shotgun is a small budget, Canadian (ed. redundant) movie (ed. Excuse me, we don't make movies, we make "films")

There are actual advertisements in the newspaper and the internet is all abuzz with chat on this movie. Is it any good?

No idea. Haven't seen it and since I can't leave the apartment, I probably won't see it until it's released on DVD.

Apparently this film is not for everyone, it's definitely a niche film with a lot of killing, bloodletting and senseless mayhem and fun.

People seem to like it and the reviews have been glowing. And there dear friends, is the problem.

Telefilm has invested in this project. But not because they wanted to.

There's no gay angels, no desperate failed dreams, no meandering, pointless plots; in short, nothing for Canada to tout at tents (ed. say that 5 times fast) at FilmFestivals as important "message" films that we do so much better than the Yanks (ed. and that no one will see).

This movie started as a trailer that won a Quentin Tarentino contest which meant it got exposed in the U.S. And on YouTube. So a lot of people saw it, and liked it and a buzz grew. And thus (ed. a little Biblical, aren't you) when asked, Telefilm was able to say, "nay, this is not for us. Too common and there's no Eqoyan's attached to this. It does not scream 'Canada' in a 'put it in a box and forget about it way'. We can't finance this." Then they went and had shrimp cocktails and held another meeting/party/red carpet.

But they forgot something. Years ago they had a review/plan/meeting/conference/report where they got all "that" and hissy and asked Producers across this great land, "Oh yeah? Well, since we suck so much at deciding what works, you tell us, smartypants, how shall we divide the pool of money that we have to spend this year."

And the wise producers went away and talked and conveneed and spent telefilm's money making reports with graphs and said "for the benefit of the marketplace and to encourage creativity, to foster growth within the industry and help Canada emerge as a powerplayer (ed. they talked like that?) we have decided the best way of spending the taxpayers money is for you to give it to us."

And the Telefilm leaders, all on salary, with bonuses not attached to performance said "what the hell. This will give us Fridays off"

And thus ENVELOPES were born. So when Telefilm said no to Hobo and went off to have more shrimp cocktails, a producer, nay ProducerS stepped up and said "Wait! we've made a lot of films at taxpayers expense and we've got a pocket of money we have to spend. Let's give it to these kids to make their little Hobo film."

More tomorrow on this.

Marches In Like a Lion With the Swords and Stuff that you see on Coats of Arms. Or is it Coat of Arms?

2011-03-07T23:29:00.002-03:00

So yeah, busy, busy, busy last couple of months. And I have to be quick because I'm stealing (ed. sharing in the greater good) wifi from the neighbour. I just wish he hadn't called his network "Hey Porn!". Anyway, who am I to judge. I can't afford internet and the new TV cable rates that Eastlink has imposed, but they have a perfectly good reason for hiking the rates. I'm sure. Otherwise Billionairre John Bragg wouldn't. I guess.

My editor tonight is the indafatigueable Lunchmeat Harold (ed. Howdy).

So Men With Broom has been cancelled. (ed. I believe they use the term "not re-newed" or "failed" or "sucked"). can't comment, never saw it (ed. Neither did -) Anyway CBC announced next years line up which includes the ever popular Rick Mercer (ed. duh), Blades of Glory (ed. duh) and InSecurity (ed. D - really?).

CTV and Global (ed. Shaw!) announced their american programs so we're alright there. Don't know why I'm paying for the same programs twice but what the hell, actually I'm not. (ed. Shush)

Oh, Harold went to various Christmas parties. Since I can't leave the apartment he's my ears and eyes and I guess taste buds. Harold?

(ed. Old news now but I went to the FilmNS party at the Halifax club. Two free drink tickets were nice but there could have been better snacks. That greenish cheese left me bound up for days. Anyway, there were new boardmembers there and Jeff Rosen and Michael Donovan. Luckily FilmNS CEO, President, Commander in Chief Ann MacKenzie was wise enough to keep the important people rounded up and she ran interference anytime any "norm" approached.

I was also at the panel they usually have for "hopefuls" to meet the broadcasters. Always a sad get-together but they had free coffee. Michael Donovan must have been at one of his vacation houses since this one was hosted by Charles "the Green Arrow" Bishop. The guy never ages, I swear. Anyway the whole laughable pretence of broadcasters down here to "explore Opportunities" was nostalgic. But you think Global would have at least played along but 2nd year in a row, they couldn't be bothered. And that's all the parties I went to.)

Wow, not like in my day when there was wall to wall parties. Even Telefilm had a national meeting before their party which I guess was a Pooper. Highlight was Telefilm saying that the 5% box office goal had not been achieved. So in the spirit of government they said they would not set that as a goal. Great! Any questions? Yes, Thom? Yes, your next film will be financed. Anyone else - ? No, can't here you...

Okay, gotta be quick. FilmNS also announced that the 25% cap on the tax credit is gone. Done. Finis! This was mostly done because animation uses a higher percentage of labour than normal production. I think we all know we have Michael Donovan to thank for this, I saw his picture in the paper when the press release was issued (ed. But Paul Rigg pestered the gov't - )

The beauty about this is that the gov't doesn't have to say "we've committed X number of dollars." That's always a drag the few times anyone even notices. Increasing the tax credit means we won't worry about paying it for years. Plus, (ed. full disclosure the blogger owns 1000 shares of DHX) there's none of the pesky asking FilmNS for money in competition with, shall we say, not so capitalistic entitities. And with the extra money being tax credits, the province is no longer an equity shareholder; i.e. the province owns parts of stuff it gives money to. (ed. See, even writing it out is hard to explain)

Other changes in the tax credit mean that the pesky living in NS rules to qualify for the tax credit rules will be loosened. Come on (ed. to your temporary) home Ontario animators.

Last thoughts "Hobo With a Shotgun" is doing extremely well (ed. Telefilm did not want to invest but Paul Gross's company did.) PicnicFace's "Rollertown" has gained a lot of momentum on-line and through Breakthrough's series deal with the group (ed. Telefilm did not want to invest).

Michael Clattenburg starts shooting "The Guys Who Moved Furniture" soon. (ed. can't imagine Telefilm wanting to be part of something titled like that but he has been successful in other things that Telefilm didn't want to sponsoer. Am I sensing a theme?)

K. Gotta go. BTW where is Eternal Kiss, Whirly Gig?

Shelburne InSecurity

2010-11-26T14:58:00.004-03:00

Okay, i'm very sorry I haven't blogged in a while but I've been very busy. (ed. Or very...tied up?)

*sigh* My editor tonight is again, the always loyal yet unamusing Lunchmeat Harold (ed. Howdy) But yes, the holidays are sometimes a bit extra "too much" so I spent them "away" from the apartment in the care of some loved ones. (ed. enough " "'s? and btw, the orderlies loved you too. X 2 )

As my loyal readers know, I don't often leave my apartment (ed. unescorted, ((snicker))) so there have been a few trials and tribulations over the last few months. But anyways, I shall endevour to continue my sworn duty to report on the film and TV business in Halifax and beyond (ed. beeeeyyoonnnnddddddd).

Shelburne, Nova Scotia is poised to return to it's place as the apex of film production it used to enjoy back in the ....ummmm, (ed. Eternal Kiss?) For the past ? years the dynamic duo of Jim kendrick and Mary Barstow have readied us for Hollywood to come calling. Despite years of nothing besides promises these Americans with no film experience, convinced our government to give them a retired military base, including land, beachfront and buildings.

(ed. Gosh, sorry, someone seems to be having a hissy fit.)

Although they haven't paid a penny in property taxes, mortgage payments or the local Popsicle Pete distributor, they continue to - I'm sorry are we really this stupid in this province? These folks have tried to encourage Christian Filmmakers to come here as long as they have money up front, the "dad" faces DUI's in the province and apparently the son likes to pick fistfights with whoever. (ed. Thank you Frank, really the only true jornalism left in the province).

Why don't we just elect them to be MLA's and be done with it! (ed. - There we go, there's the pay off. Pheww)

Anyway, let's just gloss over Christmas. (ed. he's a bit bitter since they stopped running the Frank Mill's Tiny Dancer special.)

I watched the pilot for InSecurity, the latest comedy from CBC and I must say it was a breath of fresh air. I'm just coming off watching a Curb Your Enthusiasm/Barney Miller-a-thon and I could use the break from multi-dimensional character driven comedy. (ed. I hate those where you have to think. How can you twitter at the same time if you have to think and then laugh.)

My brain enjoyed the sabbatical from realistic situations and I eagerly shifted into nuetral as the jokes telegraphed themselves to my nostalgically grade 5 mind. It was like a cross between Get Smart/3's Company and Hanging with Mr. Cooper with just a hint of Blackfly. (ed. That's shows from three decades so I guess InSecurity is multi-generational.)

Sorry, it's "lights out" so I will continue later this week. But coutesy of allnovascotia.com (ed. this is TV related, sort of) John Bragg, the owner of cable TV/internet/telephone provider Eastlink, is a bit redfaced (ed. with success!) after he had to expose his value to the CRTC. Apparently the Nova Scotia Resident (ed. eat your heart out Newfoundlanders) is worth $771 Million dollars. But allnovascotia.com crunched some numbers and it turns out he may actually be a billionnairre. (ed. Like Thurston Howell!) Gosh darn it, the guy hates to bragg but the CRTC made him. (ed. really? The CRTC can do stuff?)

So he may be the making him the 39th or 50th richest man in Canada. (ed. Gotta be #1 in Nova Scotia).

But a listing in the millionairre top 100 (ed. Billionaire) is not always secure. Luckily the Nova Scotia Government has stepped up to the plate to help. The taxpayers of this province have offered John (ed. shucks, if we may.) a $5 Million loan to help his blueberry business.

Now, gasp, I know what you're all saying; why would the poorest province in the country help out one of the richest men in the country? There's a darn good reason -
(ed. sorry, at this point he fell asleep. I actually can't wait to hear his response. When I heard this news I was almost ashamed that our goverment would make this deal. But them I thought maybe the asker should be ashamed for asking. eh, what the hell do I know.)

Awake! Anyway, I'm always willing to help out a fellow maritimer down on his luck. In fact, completely involuntarily, but voluntarilly once I found out, I started paying $2 + more last month on my cable bill. Did the quality of my TV go up? Um, yes! (ed. BTW, not that I'm feeling paranoid but, can "they" trace where blogs come from?)

Anyway, we have other stuff to talk about, later this week - NSFilm Deeming Changes, No Production cap. Previously did away with $25 restriction. Plus The Green Arrow is spotted. Sorrye, maybe too many Cosmopolitans this evening but we'll ketchup. Meanwhile Hugs and Dishes!

Falling, Falling, Falling...Like Madmen! (Get it? Cause it's Fall)

2010-10-12T19:58:00.011-03:00

Okay, sorry it's been so long; things have been really hectic here. First my sister moved back in with her Brazilian husband and their child, then they moved out except they forgot to take the kid! She said it was just post-partum depression (ed. - Doesn't your mom still have that?) but I think she and hubby went for a mini-vacation while the child was here with me.

All alone. For two days! I have nothing against children, I just don't like them.

Anyhoo, on to the subject at hand - Nova Scotia TV and Film!

As usual, my editor is my friend Lunchmeat Harold (ed. Howdy)

So I missed the Atlantic Film Festival this year. Again. On purpose. It just seems so cliquey since, well , forever. I always went to all the events when it was in it's infancey but... I watched it on Channel Ten and it was just like I was there. All talky and out of focus. Harold scored free tickets (ed. actually very few people actually pay. In the "in" crowd) and he saw some films. Apparently The Corridor was good and well, that's all he saw. (ed. I was sleepy).

Seaside Studios in Shelburne is rising up out of the haze. The American owners who "bought" the soundstage defaulted on, well just about everything; taxes, mortgage payments, suppliers, etc. My sources for all this is from allnovascotia.com (ed Harry Steele reads it) and Frank magazine whom I adore. And the Chronicle Herald for the press release official public version of events. The place went bankrupt and the owners hightailed it back to the states (ed. missed a court date for DUI, BTW, IYDM). But now they're back! With mysterious investors and they all want to make a lot of movies and bring a lot of money here. (ed. They wouldn't be looking for a little "seed" money from our gov't to let the investors know that we're serious here?) Surely the gov't wouldn't fall for that. Again. (ed. "gosh, they're Americans. And Americans make movies! I like movies. Garfield was hilarious! Not the sequel though."

Fitz 2 with Jason Priestly is shooting in the Annapolis Valley. So there's that. I should try and watch; I'll have to bit-torrent it as I can't afford the cable anymore.

In other news, those PicnicFace kids made a movie. For the last few years they've been making their own shorts their own way. Why? I don't know. But people have found them, fallen in love and watch them endlessly on YouTube. They also continue to perform live in downtown Halifax. For like five bucks. They are so naive, they're cute. Bill Niven produced their low budget film. And apparently they're going to have their own TV series on Comedy Network. (ed. that might make the name of the network less ironic). Anyway you kids blessed with only talent, you go girl(s) ...and boys. Hope Canadian film and TV reality doesn't crush your creative hearts too soon.

In national news, "Men With Brooms". Paul Gross, can you do no wrong? (ed. Apparently, if given enough Telefilm money.) I don't know what's wrong with Canadians that they're not tuning into a show about a bunch of guys they never heard of, curling. At least one person at the CBC thought this was a good idea.

Speaking of concepts, I'm also disappointed in you people about "Score". It's a musical about hockey, people! Shouldn't that draw in people who like musicals AND people who like hockey? (ed. I think the Venn diagram wis self-evident in this one).

(ed. - She: Honey, it's a movie about hockey!
He: Sounds great! Like Slapshot. Wait a minute. Do they sing? Because that would be stupid!
She: Olivia Newton John is in it.
He: Really? WTF? Maybe if it was Grease ONJ but...Jesus...

Speaking of Men With Brooms, it didn't win a Gemini but Spellchecker did! The spelling bee show won another statuette for the DHX trophy case (ed. it's right at the top of the stairs in their office.) won a Gemini. (ed. Didn't everybody? Except Men With Brooms which isn't eligible until next year.) Seriously I think this is the best million dollars the government has spent.

Speaking of DHX (ed. Full disclosure - the writer owns 1000 shares and is unnaturally passionate about the company), the bad times are over! I know I never said their were bad times but i didn't want to be negative. But the last few years have been kind of rough at DHX. But they cut expenses (ed. Employees were cut back. Managers gave up their six figure bonuses last year), and bought stuff that makes money and it looks like your tax dollars have not been spent in vain.

Acording to Michael Donovan DHX Media has seven series on the air. One of them Animal Mechanicals is doing well in the states on the HUB network. (ed. my DVR doesn't go up to the six figures). Michael doesn't want to say what the ratings are (ed. I thought ratings didn't matter only in Canada?), no one wants to quantify quality. Anyhow, this is the first quarter in a while that has a positive net income. And I'm no financial expert but I'm pretty sure that's a good thing.

One of the bright stars in the DHX family (ed. the best family are foreigners that you buy) is Wildbrain. Although revenues at DHX are low, there's plenty of cash! (ed. you're welcome Nova Scotia taxpayers) so they bought this American company that produces this show I've never heard of. According to Wikipedia, Wildbrain has a show on Nick Jr. in the states called Yo Gabba Gabba (ed. - my uncle made that same sound when he was choking on a sausage).

Speaking of which, here's part of the show. Maybe not to my taste but I can see why it's popular with pre-schoolers and college kids.

(ed. BTW, for an extra trippy afternoon, these guys are on tour with a live show. Mr. magic Mushroom is yummy in my tummy!)

And finally, I have to make note of a sadness. Powerpost has gone bankrupt. The passing of this "post house" is sad because it means a lot of post-production audio, animation and editing work will move to Ontario. But I feel bad for the guys who ran this place, I met them a long time ago, and I know that over the years they helped a lot, I mean a LOT, of newbies in the business with heavily discounted or even free work. It seemed they had the industry good in mind and maybe that's the problem. (ed. BTW DHX is up to $1.16/share.) Anyway, good to know you and good luck!

Great Balls Of Fire!

2010-09-01T21:21:00.007-03:00

Sorry Ladies (ed. and sensitive men) but this heat gets to me! If only I could store it up and use it in the winter when the apartment is frigid.

Anyway, as I type in front of the open fridge (ed. He doesn't pay for electricity and there's really only condiments in there anyway), it's time to see what's happening in the neighborhood. The Halifax TV/Film neighborhood, that is. My editor, as usual is my pal Lunchmeat Harold (ed. Howdy)

So Sam Elliot (ed. apparently his moustache has it's own trailer) was/is in town to shoot a film. Along with Karen Allen (ed. Lord, she be the apple in my eye forever!). I'm not sure what they were working on but apparently they were in the valley and drank a lot of coffee.

And Sarah Polley (ed. smart and hot!) is in Louisberg shooting a feature film with Seth Rogan and Sarah Silverman. I, I, I never imagined any two of these being in a Louisberg setting shooting a film. What the hell is that? A time machine, foul languaged comedy that will make us cry?

Meanwhile I believe Haven has finished on the south shore, based on the fact it's airing on some Canadian station. Not seen it. And the same company that produced that Big Motion picture has started filming Meet Phil Fitz II after the successful screening of the first series on The Movie Network (ed. Actually they haven't aired yet.) But the always charming and always Canadian Jason Priestly is back, hopefully this time they will assign him a driver and not subject the elderly populace of Wolfville to his NASCAR type shenanigans.

"That's So Weird" was taped in front of a CBC crew this summer. Some kids show with a bunch of Toronto people who will be "Nova Scotian" for a crucial time of their lives. (ed. not puberty, he means the "end of the year" wink, wink)

The South Shore sound stage has apparently imploded (ed. Not literally) From what I can gather the Gov't put a bunch of money into building a soundstage near/in/on Shelburne because that would draw...millionaire producers, somehow. (ed. If you build it, they will come.) But apparently no one came. (ed. Except Virginia's Run and Eternal Kiss).

The story in a nutshell (ed. where it belongs) is this. The gov't put a bunch of money into the soundstage (ed. millions) because everybody would want to make a movie there. No one wanted to make a movie there. (ed. long story short). The gov't put it up for sale. Two CFA's (ed. with no soundstage/film experience) offered to buy it. The gov't said yes, you're American, you must know better than us. They "bought" it but didn't spend a dime of their own money. For several years they didn't pay the mortgage, they didn't pay taxes and they listed the property (ed. cut up in chuncks) on eBay for sale for more than they "paid" for it. (ed. Shout out to Frank for the info.) And now they've declared bankruptcy. Sigh.

Anyway, I went looking over the CMF results for the last Quarter ending March 31, 2010. this is money that you (ed. not us, we don't pay for cable) pays into a fund to help Canadian companies develop and produce Canadian shows. Locally, Halifax Film (DHX) received $1.7 Million dollars for Pirates II (ed. This isn't the paper machee head things, is it?). So my company (ed. the writer owns 1000 shares of DHX) may not have produced much last year but let's look forward, shall we? (ed. rhetorical, but yes, let's!)

For development funds DHX received $54,811 for "That's So Weird", $30,000 for "Boy Comedy" for Teletoon (ed. I'm hoping that's a working title) , "Big Monster Show" $51,910. (ed. I hope that's a - ) Never mind! And there's also "The Nation" for CTV $39,648. (ed. What the - ? ) So good news is that "we've" developed some shows without touching our $70M reserve. And we've cut a lot of the lower level grunt workers to reduce costs, and assigned a lot of salaries and overhead to the CBC. So let's stay in there for the long run people. We're still selling that jungle show to Equador so don't panic and drive the stock price down!

In other CMF results - The Candy Show (APTN) received $183,000, Jonathan Torrens Show received $202,000, and The Halifax Comedy Fest received $137,000 and $194,000. (ed., what the - double dipping?). the Trailer Park Boys, without Mike Clattenburg (ed. Let's see how that goes in the Showcase/Global world), received $853,000. (ed. You know, them boys seem to live high off the hog.)

And in other news, the Picnicface comedy troop which I projected great things of, years ago (go ahead check my archives) (ed. Yeah, guys like you are coming out of the closet now) are filming their first feature film "Rollertown" in the next week or so. But they say they don't have enough money and are raising funds via donations and goofy fundraising things. I thought it was all publicity but one of them was quoted as saying they don't really have enough money to complete the anticipated post-production. But would producer Bill Niven go into production knowing he didn'y have enough money to deliver a finished project? Would Telefilm commit funds knowing that? Ah, who knows. It's too hot.

I'm tired and sweaty. Still have to talk about the Atlantic Film Festival (ed. AFF) Geminis and other stuff soon.

The Heat is On

2010-07-21T20:46:00.007-03:00

Good Lord, it's hot! I have my fan up to the black button but still the apartment is stifling. I put it on swivel because it feels so good when it turns toward my face, after being off my face. I complain but there's others worse off than me. Well, actually that homeless guy out there is sleeping in the shade.

Anyway, what's happening in Halliwood?

I thought, not a lot but then I had an e-mail drop on my lap (ed. if only it were encased in ice) and my blogging finger may get a workout. As always, my editor is Lunchmeat Harold. (ed. Howdy.)

So "Afghan Luke" has wrapped production. This was a Mike Clattenburg "joint" filmed in B.C., for some reason. I thing it's about a loyal but conflicted dog, but I'm not sure.

"Cloudburst", a "filimm" by Thom Fitzgerald is still shooting in the province (ed. 2 will get you 5 there's a gay character) and "Jump the Broom" is also shooting with the lovely "Angela Basset". (ed. sigh)

By the way, nobody ever commented on "Eternal Kiss", Paul Kimball's vampire movie. Is it good, bad...(ed. does it "suck"? snicker)

"Happy Fun Time Drugs Hippies and Flatulence" the new show by the stars of TPB (ed. You don't have to write that out?) has completed filming. Apparently Amy Sedaris was in town for it. (ed. sigh)

And I thought that was all that was going on until I received the CTF (ed. CMF?) funding results in my box. There was a lot of stuff happening below the radar.
(ed. tch, if only someone out there would let you know).

"Man of a Thousand Songs" for Superchannel (ed. still alive?) producers Terry Greenlaw and William MacGillvrey (ed. Are they Newfoundland residents or Nova Scotian? Or do they have dual citizenship?)

" Mr. D" a pilot for CBC starring Gerry D was produced but no sign of it in the CBC fall schedule.

"True Bromance" was developed for CBC by Jay Dahl.

The Candy Show was produced for APTN. I think this is a talk show with Candy Palmater a native (ed. careful), gay (ed. easy) lawyer (ed.now you've done it! They're going to throw us off the net!)

The Halifax Comedy Festival for 2 years? (ed. WTH? 2 years?) produced by ex CBC Geoff Deon for the CBC.

Ocean Entertainment (ed. Producer of Chef Something) seems to be trying to branch out with "Criminal Makeover" in development for S-Vox (I thought we eliminated that with a vaccine) (ed. obviously EVERYONE needs a make-over once in a while) and "Radical Garage" for CTV?

John W. Chisholm's Arcadia (ed. is that spelled right?) produced Jonathan Torren's new TV show called..."TV With Jonathan Torrens" and they are in development on something called "Living Beauty" for CTV.

BTW, Rick Mercer's show received $3,580,111 from CTF. I'm not saying anything bad about the show (ed. It's adorable!) but if this is just part of the budget what the hell do they spend it on? Never mind, I don't want to know. (ed. can you move over, you're hogging the fan.) And This Hour received $2.1M but that's mostly star power salary so that's okay.

Now as many of you know I am an investor in HFX Films/Decode/Studio B/Bulldog (ed. his Father left him 1,000 shares) and I have been concerned lately because I hadn't heard anything was going on there. (ed. What were they doing? Sitting on their laurels? And stacks of investor cash?) The last i heard all they had going on was "something Idol" that they announced at Banff. But just going through the list of cable end users contributions I see they have been quite busy.

The list of projects in development includes (ed. Does not include Studio B and Decode projects which are CFA's):

"Big Monster Show" - CBC
"Befriend and Betray" - Global
"Boy Comedy" (ed. This sounds fishy) - Teletoon
"That's So Weird" - Now being produced for YTV at CBC Halifax studios
"The Nation" - CTV

What I like about this (ed. Beside the money?) is the fact that the pressure on the CTV/CBC/Global development people relaxes. No need to go through all those other submissions.

But besides devlopment DHX was in production last year on "Animal Mechanicals" (ed. $1.18M from CTF) and Pirates II ($1.7 M). God, they are so modest when it comes to making stuff (ed. with other people's money).

And it warms my heart that DHX is on the cutting edge of (ed. mandated changes) multi-platformed entertainment delivery. Other platforms (ed. i.e. websites) were financed to the tune of $200,000 for 22 Minutes, $200,000 for Bo on the Go and
$200, 000 for Pirates (ed. something tells me the maximum was $200,000)

This is sweet for various reasons. Joe and Joan Lunchpail's kids don't watch "TV" anymore. Everything is on-line. So creating content specifically for the computer generation is just da'bomb! Plus, really how much does it cost to set up a websiite and hire someone to cut and paste and type synopsis onto it?

Spring Cleaning

2010-05-26T07:51:00.004-03:00

I was just doing a bit of cleaning when I found some older stuff behind the couch that I hadn't posted. (ed. Not covered in dust bunnies, are they?)

My editor as usual, is my friend Lunchmeat Harold. (ed. Howdy)

Halifax Film raised another $16.5 Million through a share offering some weeks (months?) (ed. It's all a blur to me too) They already have a lot of cash on hand and the government still owes them a lot of money from tax credits. (ed. Now we have to cash flow the government? Pay up you high rollers.)

So we're flush with cash (ed. Note: the author owns 1000 shares of DHX). And DHX intends to buy more and more companies that produce kids shows like the ones they already bought Decode and Studio B.

Sidebar, your honour, re share prices and Decode. (ed. relevence?) Isn't everything relevent, your honour? Aren't the singing birds relevent to a butterfly in Brazil who are relevent to the wrinkles on Abe Vigoda's scrotum? (ed. Whatever. Proceed.)

Per allnovascotia.com, a while back (ed. weeks? Months?) Yes, one of those, Exec VP at Decode, Beth Stevenson sold 200,000 shares of DHX stock at $1.05 to $1.16 a share. Over the last year she sold 400,000 shares, 169,000 of those @ $ 0.63 last June. Jeesh, somebody needed the cash. Should have waited, because they're trading at OVER $1.00, now. Whatsamatter, a temporary loss of faith? I wish I had the cash at the time, I would have bought them because I have the highest confidence in DHX. More than "some people" I could mention.

BTW, congrats to Beth on being a finalist in the IPF Multi-media o-rama. This was a "competition" where the winners would receive cash to finance web based entertainment shows. You know, TV on the internet that's so much more than TV on the internet. The competition is usually a place where struggling writer/director/animators get some money to live on while trying to develop projects and break into the business. Gosh, maybe Beth is struggling, after all.

Speaking of allnovascotia.com, yesterday they reported on an interview with Michael Donovan on the financial well being of Halifax Film. Although revenues are down because broadcasters are ordering fewer programs (ed. sigh, remember Global Television's early mornng kid's shows'o'rama?), an 11% cut in operational expenses (ed. the espresso/biscotti cart is no longer coming around?) should ease the pain of a Q1 loss.

And things are looking up (ed. look way up and I'll call Rusty. Heh, remember humans on kids shows?), one might say things are looking "toyetic". Animal Mechanicals, a hit in "Canada...U.K., Brazil and Poland" could be the knight in shining armor that we need. Toyetic, our word for the day, means this show will genrate sales of toys, games, T-shirt's, mongrammed L'il junior bathrobes, lollipops and all kinds of fine merchandise that kids will scream to own. The show, which I haven't seen, is apparently a Transformers for pre-schoolers but is supposed to teach co-operation (ed. Or some such crap. Who cares? I want my Animal Mechanical jumpsuit.

The key is a deal with a network in the states called The Hub. (ed. um, I fear that's not on basic cable.)

Speaking again of allnovascotia.com (ed. jeesh, why don't you just marry them?) they printed a letter (ed. I think you mean posted his e-mail, you hick.) from Paul Donovan who has nothing to do with DHX. Paul, apparently has just returned from working in Germany, on what, I do not know. I hope he was here in time to catch up on his old pal Rutger Hauer who just finished working on Hobo With a Shotgun, a local film produced by Paul Gross about a Hobo with something. (BTW, Paul Donovan, whatever happened to The Conclave?)

Anyway, Paul's letter was in support of PowerPost Productions Ltd which recently filed for bankruptcy protection. PowerPost, which does post-production work on TV and films, had started life as an arm of Salter Street Films. But they sold it to the Power Brothers (ed. just thinking out loud, that sounds like a cool name for a superhero show.) The company did a lot of work for DHX until they didn't anymore. Paul thinks the company is too inportant to the local industry and the government should step in and help them. (ed. tax credits, maybe?) Most production companies "are all struggling to get their next project financed" . "I think the film industry will soon discover that it's best days are behind it unless the province steps in and exerts some larger picture influence."

Troubling words indeed.

If PowerPost shuts down, DHX will have to ship stuff to Montreal for Post-production. Not only does that mean shipping costs but the post costs themselves won't count for the provincial film tax credit. (ed. Other local filmmakers may also - ).

This government better get off it's high horse soon if it wants to seen any return on it's investment. (ed. But they're not invest - ). Paul rarely speaks up about industry infastructure things (ed. Isn't he friends with - ) so you know this is important. It's time we think about others, don't you think, government with your money?

(He also mentions the millions of government dollars wasted on Elctropolis but it might not be the best time to bring that up.) (ed. Stop using brackets, that's my thing! And stop cutting me - )

So, um, yeah. I guess that's it with a few final notes. Our last post brought a few comments about Eternal Kiss, a film by Paul Kimball that had it's premier a month back (ed. or a few weeks, whatever.) A comment was made in less glowing terms that the film itself was not that good. But I've yet to hear any other reviews. Anybody else, see it?)

Film Nova Scotia was looking into setting up a local Film and TV Walk of Fame. Has this happened? Any ideas on who should be nominated to be the first filmmaker planted?

Walk of fame. Animal Mechanicals "Toyistic"

Walk of Fame

Spring is in the Air and the Smell of Film Weaves it's Magic Web

2010-04-08T07:41:00.011-03:00

Okay, sorry, I haven't blogged in a whle. Been busy with spring cleaning, treatments, created an afghan for my bed (ed. a bed covering, right? Not a dog. Because you are not the Creator; capital "C")

Editor, as usual, is my pal Lunchmeat Harold.

So what's new in the local film and TV business? Whirlygig has wrapped production; a film by Chaz Thorne; something about a middle-age guy who has to come home and live in his parents basement (ed. kinda like you, except for the parents thing. And the basement. And probably hygiene.)

Also, The Corridor has been completed; script by Josh MacDonald and directed by Evan Kelly, whom I was told did a bang-up professional job. Seriously, I wasn't there but someone really said that. (ed. Someone just got their med's cheered up.)

And Hobo With A Shotgun is still shooting (ed. I wonder what that's about?) with Blade Runner guy Rutger Hauer! That is way cool. And not Mr. Hauer's first time in the provinces; he was here years ago to shoot an episode of Lexx. I think there was blood and sex involved in that particular episode.

So that's a lot of movies for this place; impressive in the fact that they're not Hollywood films cashing in. They're really Nova Scotia films (ed. I'm tearing up. Don't look at me! Move on.)

But one local film, alas, has not spread any local cheer. Apparently, Eternal Kiss had it's premiere last week and the reviews were less than glowing. Well, actually one review (ed. but that's 100% of the reviews you've received.)

"I am very surprised to see that you have not posted about Paul Kimball's 'Eternal Kiss' screening? The lack of competence behind the creation of that film (made with provincial money) made a lot of people very very angry. And if you indeed are fighting the fact that "no one talks openly about it", it being our industry, I am very surprised you haven't mentioned the backlash. It has been a buzzword for most of our industry this past week."

See my previous posting for the full comment.

Anger? Backlash? Geesh, all I saw were congratulations on the film on Facebook. As I'm unable to leave my apartment I was unable to attend the screening (ed. plus you weren't invited.), so I can't give an actual opinion on the film until it appears on my illeagal TMN feed some late night. Apparently it's about vampires, which is a very hot topic.

Anyone else see it? Have opinions? A review? (ed. Bueller? Bueller?)

Halifax Film and Television Industry Trudges On

2010-03-19T20:09:00.006-03:00

Okay, so, like, I'm posting again, because people say I don't post enough but then no one tells me stuff that's like, going on so I'm all like, dude, whateveeerrrrr. (ed. This would have been satiric like 25 years ago.)

My editor tonight is Lunchmeat Harold (ed. howdy)

The rumble out of CBC T.O. Headquarters is that This Hour has 22 Minutes may not return for next year. For a while now, some naysayers in the Broadcast Centre of the Universe is that the money they pay for the show is not worth the ratings. Sure the show may be a little top heavy with salaries, but $175,000 a year is nothing for the talent we're talking about. (ed. actualy that's per week)

Irregardless, Michael Donovan has come up with a clever strategy, and really does the man do any other kind. He's decided to press the press (ed. groan) with his case that 22 Minutes should go on for another year.

The article in The Metro-News (ed. Did that get nominated for a Pulitzer for it's reprinting of Hollywood gossip?) mentioned that the show has suffered a dip in ratings this year but since then Mark Farel has regained the reins of the runaway stagecoach from showrunner Ed MacDonald and things have improved and will continue to improve (ed. We promise, just give us another year? Or 2? Or 6 because then it will have run 22 years. Get it? (ed. Got it.)

Michael, (if I dare be so bold), mentions that the low ratings are actually the CBC's fault for not publizising the show enough. (ed. er, that's usually a result of a decision, rather than a cause).

BTW, I'm not sure I like this new regieme at CBC. They seem more concerned with ratings and advertising and all that baloney, rather than personal relationships, expensive italian restaurants and how business is done on a handshake and a fart regardless of the production. (ed. God, I do remember The Itch) If it was good enough 18 years ago, why are we trading canoes in mid-stream now?

But I digess. (ed. back to you.)

Now with very little other production going on for Halifax Film, the cancelling of 22Minutes could be serious for my bottom line. (ed. the author owns 1000 shares of DHX aka Halifax Film). Because the budget allows for a small stipend to contribute to Halifax Films rising costs, we may have to actually dip into our own cash. Yes, you read that right. In a business where it;s expected we can live off the drainage of OPM, (ed. Other People's Money) we may have to use our IPO capital to pay the rent. (Not for another few years so don't get all paniky on me)

I'm hoping that the reorganization of the CTF into the CMF will confuse enough people long enough to shore up our dykes (ed. as in Holland and the sea, people, please.) There's already a 22 minutes on-line whsich should justify (ed.barely) all the new rules and regulations of our multi-platform universe. (ed. and before the friggen unions get wind.)

In the meantime DHX announced today (ed. wow, busy day publicity wise. It's like someone said we should be in the news more.) Animal Mechanicals, I'm not sure what this show is about but if the kddies buy the toys, bring it on!
(ed. a show about fixing pets with robotic pieces), has been sold to an American Network! A major broadcaster! So yeah!!!!! They've already sold in the cool parts of the world and to Al-Gezara

But how does the rest of the industry fare in Nova Scotia? (ed. We care, we really do.)

Cheryl Hassen, where are you?

What's happening with The Corridor? Done?

Also, likewise, similarly Whirlygig?

Mike Clatenburg starts directing Afghan Luke tomorrow? What be that?

Cashed the old HST cheque today so now it's time to settle back with a few cosmopolitans and quarter pounders and relax.

Goodbye Big O

2010-02-26T22:15:00.008-03:00

I'm soooooo glad those O games are over. Really, I've never been a fan of any sports that make you wet and cold. Even watching them was too much to bear especially when the heat conked out about a week ago. (ed. you have to pay the oil bill every time they deliver oil. That's the law!)

Tonight my editor is Lunchmeat Harold (ed. Howdy!)

I've had criticism that my blog is too wordy, goes on and on, and takes forever to get to the point (ed. Irony. Got it. Move on.)

My blog last time, or maybe the time before (ed. Don't know. Don't read them) expressed concern about a rumour that the tax credit for film and television in Nova Scotia was going the way of fiscal restraint by politicians in this province (ed. Nice foreshadowing).

But from what I understand from Lenore Zann, the gov't was looking at money spent on TV and Film but not the tax credit. And Percy Paris just came back from the Berlin Film Festival (ed. Now which Nova Scotia film was playing there?) so I'm sure he's now been indoctrinated (ed. "he now appreciates" might be a better) how the industry works in this province. Nothing like a German Goody Basket to appreciate the possibilities (ed. and if I remember my school trip to West Berlin all those years ago, there really is nothing like a German Goodie).

So that's better. Now about those greedy N.S. politicians who've been in the news over the last month, just using taxpayer dollars for their own personal -(ed. okay stop there. We're all tired of hearing about them.)

Okay. Back to the TV and film business.

The CTF results are finalized for the year, and although I'm dismayed by the dirth of NS productions in receipt of dollars, at least they did go to the right ones.

(ed. Note: the writer owns 1000 shares of DHX Inc.)

This Hour welcomed $2,181,503 in CTF money. (ed. They must have produced 40 - 50 episodes with that.)

And I really have to mention my concern here for DHX. I've copied the following and I'm about to paste it below but I need a moment. (ed. you know this isn't in real time and no one will be pausing here?)

"DHX revenues (are) down 56% in the last quarter"

And again. (ed. breathe)

DHX "Distribution revenues to be flat"

And...no, I can't - (ed. I will)

"Net loss of $209,000." (ed. How can you lose money when you don't use your own?)

Okay, okay but let's not panic. Despite this, the company is in solid shape, okay. Although they haven't done much producing lately (ed. Damn you Osama Bin Laden!), the company is fiscally flush. There are millions and millions of dollars owed to the company, 69% of it owed by the gov't, and you know they're good for it. (ed. we know where you live.)

So although CFO (Sharkey) Dana Landry (ed. $223K per) addressed analysts (ed. have you ever seen an undressed analyst?) "Based on history, that's how we're judging our optimism to get back to those levels and even larger amounts".

Um, I think I feel better. (ed. It makes perfect sense. We made money before, and we'll do what we did then with all those parameters and circumstances exactly the same and we'll make money again. Trussssstttt in meeeeee. Whoa, I feel woozy.)

But I worry when Allnovascotia reports that "Michael Donovan spoke with Measured Reticence" (ed. Why, because he's such an upbeat life of the party?)

But then Dana Landry reported there was a "deal with U.S. Broadcaster for Animal Mechanicals which is the "Magic Bullet" for DHX successful in the U.K. and Latin America" (ed. translated into Latin?). "Licensing is where the money is (ed. I still have my original Scooby Doo pajamas though they're a bit snug now)".

But enough for that. I still struggle with the decision to keep my shares or sell them. I'd feel like such a traitor if I sold them to feed my heinous keeping warm and eating monkeys on my back. Damn you heinous keeping warm and eating monkeys on my back.

In other news: Phil Phitz with Jason Priestly (ed. Not a real priest)has wrapped up.

Whirleygig a Chaz Thorne "joint" is currently in production. (ed. Did he write too, or just direct?) as well as "The Corridor" written by someone called Josh MacDonald and directed by someone called Evan Kelly. These are features which are not for children and don't feature puppets or animation so...the Genie nominations are out. Canadian films. Didn't see them and neither did you.

Oh, Glen Mathews did a day to day log on shooting of The corridor but he doesn't report anything about anyone sleeping with anyone else, so there you go. but here's a linky http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/notes/glen-matthews/the-corridor-day-14-15/355129183071.

oh, and a Gerri Dee pilot for CBC was shot and "word on the street" says it's not that funny. (ed. $350K from CTF)

I guess that's all the news that's phit to print (ed. see you should have left that Phil Phitz thing for here for continuity.)

Chow

...and back.

2010-02-10T23:03:00.004-03:00

Okay, so I joined the 21st Century and started a Facebook page and quite a lot of "friends" jumped aboard. However, no one really talked to me or gave me any info on the state of the industry in Nova Scotia. I hope this doesn't turn out the last time when I went to bed one night and everybody un-friended me. I couldn't take that pain again. After all, I'm here because of you all!

Irregardless, I will share some tidbits I've picked up but first I'll introduce my editor, the irrascable Lunchmeat Herold. (ed. howdy!)

LOL, that gets me everytime.

The first funding deadline has elapsed for the FilmNS money slots. It'll be interesting to see who all is out there looking to leverage the taxpayer's money. Last year the highest benificiary was Halifax Film (ed. Full disclosure, the blogger owns 1000 shares in HFX/DHX/Studio B/tbd) and in 2nd place was Ocean Entertainment. Though I can't see how cooking shows will return an investment better than a one shot spelling bee. (ed. Yeah, I can't see one beating the other over cash sales, either).

So we'll see how the funding shakes out in the next month or so. I hope Halifax Film gets some provincial funding. That with money from a broadcaster, CTF and tax credits will keep our cash flow, flowing and hopefully we won't have to touch our cash (ed. $70-ish million). Last year the Hfx Film principals forewent (ed. past present of forego) any bonus's. Luckily the province stepped up with overhead and and producer fees to cover the basic, down to the floor, no bonus's (ed. said that.) salaries of the executives. Michael Donovan, Charles "The Green Arrow" Bishop, Dana Landry and David Reagan. Reagan (ed. Ragan, Regan, Rogan?) had to even sell his house, for the love of god! Oh, and there's some other guy in Toronto who makes more but that's because he's from Toronto. But a Million + is small potaoes compared to , um, someone else who makes more money.

So hopefully the province will "do the right thang" as Spike Jones would say and cough up. And I'm sure something will be made for CBC.

Anyways, the only projects I've heard on the go are:

- "Whirlygig", another Chaz Thorne joint. (ed. How about a variety headline "Chaz's Latest Gig a Whirly!" I have no idea what this is about. Sounds like it could be a circus movie or hookers at a boy scout jambouree.

- "The Corridor", written bu Josh MacDonald, directed by Evan Kelly and produced by Beverly Bliss. I have no idea who these people are bt a movie about a hallway doesn't sound that exciting.

- "The Berzerkers: Men of Dignity", Something from the mind of Michael Clattenberg (ed. but, but...what happens to Bubbles?). I have no idea if this is a feature, a series, video game or Michael's neighbours on acid (ed. Should you really be writing a column?)

- "Hobo With a Shotgun" - Jason Eisener made a trailer that Quinton Terrantino liked. So now it's a movie?

From the "Where are they Now" Column; Jay Dahl's scary thing; Paul Donovan's "The Conclave", Paul Kimball's Eternal Kiss"? Waiting gentlemen. I think you could learn from Michael Donovan about how to say he's going to make a movie, go out and make a movie and then...do some other stuff after the movie doesn't do as good as it should have with the stupid public who needed a Rwanda movie after the otehr ones. their loss. Loosers.

Goodnight.

Halifax Film Tax Credit Safe

2010-01-15T09:10:00.007-03:00

A non-story scare. I was worried the government was going to do away with the provincial film/tv tax credit before I sold my show idea to Halifax Film, but Lenore Zann reports that Graham Steel is not contemplating doing away with the Tax Credit That would be a disaster for the industry in Nova Scotia and yours truly who holds 1000 shares of DHX which is THE industry in Nova Scotia.

As always my editor tonight is Lunchmeat Harold (ed. Howdy)

When you think about the $22 Million spent on the film/tv tax credit last year it's a drop in the bucket (ed. compared to the hunt for wmd. Sorry NS, about there not being enough hospital beds.)

Ahem! Still there are naysayers, (I'm looking at you Harold) and the gov't of the day says "In a perfect world we would find a way to make this industry grow so its not totally dependant on the tax credit."

Okay, scary stuff I know but he's talking about a perfect world, not Nova Scotia.

In other news DHX aka Halifax Films announced that they received $1.5M from a hedge fund firm as an investment (ed. aren't those the companies in the states that caused - )

Anyway, according to David Regan at Halifax Film this will add to their already liquid position (ed. should I be getting turned on?) and they will start looking for other kids TV production companies to take over. (ed. Does this sound like someone's putting a big fat carrot into a wabbit trap? Didn't Michael Donovan want to quit last year?)

I'm glad to hear they are looking to grow because I don't hear a lot of producing going on. Since they raised $70M in an IPO, another million from Nova Scotia Business Inc (ed. gov't money to hire N.S. i.e. Ontario kids) and used FilmNS and tax Credits to fund everyday expenses and salaries, I was worried they were not going to "make" money. But the fact that a hedge fund firm invests money with you when you don't have a clear forecast of a profit happening soon, causes share prices to go up. (ed. didn't it make them money too? Do they have to announce when they sell shares?)

I'm was worried because I don't hear a lot of producing going on. (ed. Why would they produce?)

I guess you're right there. Any producing going on will be like the spelling bee thing (ed. $250,000 from FilmNS? The kids got pens as prizes!) will cover
day to day expenses. Now we're just dealing and wheeling and speculating.

Of course I was a little put out by the fact that the NS taxpayer funded DHX had it's general meeting in toronto last fall (ed. you can't leave the apartment anyway) but still Michael Donovan says he likes living here and dagnabbit so do I!

(ed. why wouldn't he like living here? He earns his living from Nova Scotia.)

Halifax Film Industry - This Just In (ed. Like, a Month ago)

2009-10-29T16:30:00.011-03:00

Well, where do I begin? There's just so much happening lately in the film and television business in Nova Scotia so I guess I'll just start by introducing my editor, Lunchmeat Harold. (ed. Howdy!)

Gerry Dee just shot a pilot in Nova scotia for the CBC; a sitcom where he's a teacher. "Amelia" staring Hilary Swank, partially shot in NS, opened to low numbers and kept them. TMN is shooting a sitcom on the south shore with that guy who used to be on the show, you know the one. (ed. Peyton Place? Hogan's Hero's? 90210?) Yes.

FilmNS (ed. or is it NSFilm) released their annual report and the winner in the $$$$ give away is - DHX Media Inc! Yeah! (ed. Note: the author owns 1000 shares of said company.) Ocean entertainment's self help shows took in $450,000 last year (ed. Help yourself!), but the clear winner was DHX Media aka Halifax Film with $700,000! (ed. that came in handy. what with the recession and only $69,000,000 in revenue last year. We are not touching the $70M in investor money. That's just for emergencies)

That's like almost a third of the money the FilmNS (ed. or NSFilm) put into equity last year for the whole province. Now I can hear the grumbling but this have-note province should be investing in these projects. Just look at these potential money makers:

- $300,000 in Soul a mini-series on Vision. Now that money went to pay the cost of producing it, but the real payback is when this gets sold...(ed. I hear crickets) maybe somewhere else.

- $150,000 Mighty Jungle III - who doesn't love kid's shows? Who doesn't like monkeys? So a kid's show about monkeys? Solid gold! Hopefully the distribution expenses and the selling costs and the applicable overhead don't take out too much of a chunk. (ed. Coming to America, anybody?)

- And $250,000 on SuperSpeller. Now I have to admit when I heard DHX was doing a spelling bee show, I was concerned (ed. hadn't we been there, done that, spelled it all?) but it was a very entertaining show. I was glued to the CBC for the entire time it ran. Which disappointedly was 4 nights. (ed. you don't get much for a quarter of a million of taxpayer's dollars anymore. That's like, what, couple thousand swine flu shots. Plus the show took like two years to get made. What the hell was that?) But I'm sure a limited mini-series featuring Canadian kids in a spelling competition will have world-wide appeal and potential sales. (ed. I hear more crickets)

Still I'm sure the taxpayers of this province will be proud as a peacock to claim ownership (ed. if not much of a financial return) in these DHX productions. (ed. This doesn't count the tax rebates on those Millions of dollars of production, either, does it?)

But don't think that the millions of dollars in provincial direct investment and tax credits will go right into the pockets of anybody at Halifax Film.

Allnovascotia.com has revealed that the executives of DHX, Michael Donovan, Charles Bishop, Steven Denure and Dana Landry will not be getting any bonuses's this year! Take that taxpayers! Bet not having a flu shot seems unimportant now, doesn't it?

But because $100 invested in 2006 in DHX is now only worth $37.62 by the end of June this year, these fine executives want you to know they will not be enjoying any extra bread on their butter this year (ed. shame the GG just finished giving out some baubles). No bonus's. I'll type it again in capital letters - NO BONUS'S. This is the dedication you are paying for (ed. or at least not seeing a return on your investment for.)

Luckily these self-sacrificing souls were able to wrench a raise last year from the tight fists of the company's shareholders. Thus they will get by with salaries only. Again, No Bonus's.

So they will get by on their salaries only; our courageous comrades (ed. let's call them the "No Bonus Amigos!) Michael Donovan $325,000, Charles "the Green Arrow" Bishop $325,000, Dana Laundry $327,000, Stephen Denure $679,345.

I believe the province has not even invested enough in equity and tax credits to pay even their base salary.

But enough about the past (ed. yes please.), what of the future. Kid's shows (ed. and Nova Scotia tax payers. Eck, I'm feeling kinda fluish) have been our bread and butter but have we saturated that market? CBC is full. Really can't squeeze any more kids shows into the lineup. Where do we go?

Something called Befriend and Betray? A movie or mini-series about bikers? Hmmm, not criticizing but it sounds like another vanity project of somebody's. (ed. As long as you don't use our money you can make whatever you want.)

There's another movie called Zebra something about an African football (ed. soccer) team, maybe a black and white, younger Rocky?

All I want to know is, when is the government going to step in with some cash stimulous, other than federal and provincial tax credits, and provincial equity and development dollars? It's only that and CTF money (ed. that's cable consumer's money, isn't it?) and licence fees from the broadcaster that are just barely keeping the true hero's of Canadian television in non-bonus liquidity.

(ed. I'm sorry, what is all that investor's money for?)

I'm Still Standing After All These Months, Blah, Blah, Blah.

2009-10-04T11:14:00.002-03:00

Despite lawyers, doctors, and some non-fans (ed. really, are there people cruising teh internet all day calling everything and anything "gay") I'll be back to comment soon.

And look at all the stuff that's been going on in tv and film in nova scotia since I've been on hiatus.

Seriously, go ahead and look, I'll wait.

la,la, I'm still standing, la,la,la.....................

Halifax Film / DHX Shareholders - Shame!

2009-02-17T14:56:00.007-03:00

Dear Readers, I've waited as long as I could before blogging but I cannot hold my tongue much more. (ed. especially since you've been biting on it for days now.)

As usual, my editor is my friend Lunchmeat Harold. ( ed. Howdy!)

I read in the newspaper a few days ago and in today's edition of Allnovascotia.com about the going's on at Halifax Film's Annual General Meeting (ed. at the Halifax Club! Any leftover shrimp skewers?)

I think the shareholders that were there are darn lucky that I'm unable to leave the apartment or I would have shown up and given them a piece of my mind. After all I am also a shareholder of DHX (ed. 1000 shares) and I was fully entitled to be there. Nevermind that I didn't get an invite, I'm sure that's just a mix-up. (ed. But you called them and e-mailed everyone in the place a million -)

"Pointed questions" is what allnovascotia.com calls these ungratefuls grilling of Michael Donovan, and the other Muskateer execs. (ed. easy, big fella).

They question raises of 27% to 51% of their salaries. Seems like a lot but it's a matter of perspectives, we're not talking millions here folks; its just double digit increases on six (ed. not seven!) figure salaries. And given the economic meltdown that we're going through, give these guys a break. Charles "the Green Arrow" Bishop in now earning only $356,250 and Dana Landry is earning less at $355,030. (ed. whip out your salaries boys and see who's is bigger.)

And when you take into consideration that it's not all salary (ed. $50K is in "bonus's"), they are not out of line with N.Y. investment bankers. And which of the two would you rather have in delicatly cradling your portfolios? I thought so!

Remember although DHX has 16 shows in production, most of them are being made with OPM. (ed. Other People's Money e.g. Tax Credits, Film NS, CTF) and "producer's Fees" come out of them. Why the investment in Jungle Jim alone is almost enough to pay the bonus's! (ed. is that a good thing or a bad thing?)

Besides, it's an INVESTMENT! The province has invested in a lot of the children's shows and they are going great guns worldwide. Nova Scotia is probably drowning in cash from all the sales they announce to asia, spain etc. (ed. Coincidentaly, Coming to America will turn a profit very soon.)

And like your junior high baseball team, this is a (re?)building year. DHX is pumping out as much children's content they can so they'll be ready "for the future." Not sure how but Mr. Donovan predicts that there's a "17-year-old walking to highschool now and he's just got an idea." (ed. God, careful around those snowbanks! Don't get run over by one of those Hybrids!@)

Wouldn't you have waited for Mr. Gates to exist, come up with great ideas and turn them into cash! I for one am waiting for this anonymous, acne riddled, barely-there-mustache wearing messiah to come forth! (ed. Which one is he?)

But Mr. Donovan had a perfect comeback for those questioning the exec's salaries; the TV industry is all about relationships and these good ole boys have it in spades. That's where the value is. Not in scripts or concepts or ideas. Anyone can have those. (ed. actually I have a great idea for a show - )

I for one am proud to be a part of an industry where its who you know that gets you ahead. Doesn't it save so much time an energy for the broadcasters to sit down over dinner at a high end Toronto restaurant like..er....(ed. I don't know any either.) and make a deal. Broadcasters then don't have to beat the bushes dealing with scruffy little people "developing original" ideas from scratch. (ed, that does sound disgusting. Have you seen those squigee kids?)

More later. The fetal alcohol kid from down the hall is coming home and he has to bang the wall with his helmet all the way to his apartment, damn it!

And as for the $2.2M lost on Shake Hands With the Devil (ed. the last but not the least of the many movies on the topic that people shouldn't have gotten numbed to!), it will be forthcoming as a distributor has been found for the film in the states. Of America!

And then the's the E1 debacle which I believe we were so lucky to have gotten out of even if we dropped $1.1 M on that. (ed. How many Jungle Jim's are we up to now?)

Though I was saddened when the deal was called off as I was hoping to sell maybe a few of the shares that were worth $ .46/share at the time for the selling price offered of $1.59. Would have been nice to splurge on some quarter pounders and cheese and a few cosmopolitons. And maybe I did wonder, as one shareholder did at the AGM about where Mr. Donovan was going to go after the deal was done? But I'm sure all these plans and failed plans are only for the good of the shareholder and I am proud to declare myself one of them! (ed. My country tis of thee, sweet land of liberty - )

So that clears that up.

In other news -

- I hear that CTV's Eastern Development manager Anne-Marie Lapointe is no longer within the Eastern Region? Wasn't she just here a second ago, brand new to the job? How does CTV expect to mine the rich source of talent down here? Remember, some of us can't leave the apartment.

- Whatever happened to The Conclave? Just wondering.

- And the CRTC has announced that they only be giving out one year licenses coming into the next renewal round and they propose that the private broadcasters spend as much money on homegrown production as they do buying American shows. (ed. Teehee, Must be like early April Fools.) CRTC is not going to be pushed around anymore! Unless they get pushed really hard by the Aspers and the Rogers and the whoever owns CTV (ed. The KOC?) This is really cool grandstanding but I think it means that the CRTC just wrote its own execution order.

Halifax Film....and TV Stuff. I'm still standing! After all these Years...lalala

2009-02-11T22:21:00.006-03:00

Okay, I'm a little concerned in what's happening lately. Before I start, let me introduce my editor tonight, the always reliable Lunchmeat Harold. (ed. Howdy!)

So over the last six months, maybe longer, don't know, the world economy has failed. Whatever. I don't really care as I retreated from the "world" a long time ago. I didn't care and apparently "the world" hasn't missed me either.

My only touch with the "real" world (ed. i.e. reality) is that outside of entertainment news, the only thing I keep on top of is my one and only investment; I own 1000 shares of DHX aka Halifax Film. It was great when it was trading at $1.60 a share when I first inherited it but now it's worth 46 ...cents!? (ed. for some reason there's no "cents" symbol on this computer. Probably Bill Gates didn't see the need.)

But,all the exec's at Halifax Film just gave themselves raises and bonus's which means things are good, right? Right?

But good news, they've shuttered that Bulldog whatever investment. Sure there's a couple hundred thousand $ loss involved (ed. Bob Barker Rules!), but no sense throwing good money after bad. Who thought it was a good idea to buy into a company that's premise is that children need to work out on a daily basis. (ed. We make TV shows. Let's by a gym!)

But like the difference between good sex and bad sex, it's all in the timing. The AGM is being held this week. Michael Donovan says that not only is it a general meeting of shareholders, it will be a "special" meeting. Should I be scared?

If only I had the ability to leave the apartment I'd be there! (ed. shrimp skewers notwithstanding)

Hopefully someone wiil share with sugarbear as to what's being said at the meeting.

Goodnight.

Halifax Film....and TV Stuff. I'm still standing! After all these Years...lalala

2009-02-11T22:21:00.001-03:00

It's a New Year! And film in Halifax is...?

2009-01-30T23:27:00.005-03:00

It's been a long time a'bloggin' (ed. isn't that one of the twelve days of xmas?) so let's get to all the relevant (ed. and irrelevant ) stuff. My editor, as usual is my pal Lunchmeat Hearald (ed. Howdy citizens!)

So what's new in Canadian Tvslashfilm?

CTF has been renewed for 2 more years. (ed. Yes! We eat. Maybe. Big Brother can you spare a dime for a documentary filmmaker? Nationally, culturally important. But no, sorry, it's not about hockey.)

"Treevenge" a nova scotia short film has been going great guns on the internet and scored a top five amongst film fans at Sundance. Good suff. I'm guessing it didn't cost anything. Go you young tyros!

Closer to home (ed. God! he's going to talk about himself.) things have been okay. My sister Karlie and her Brazillian boyfriend/fiancee/husband (though not recognized by any legal entity whatsoever) have moved out of the apartment with their "newborn". Worried me a bit but Prince kama a maya or whatever his name is, has continued paying rent and other bills for me, so I'm cool with the whole thing. And he's even arranged for groceries to be delivered here on a regular basis which is a boon to me since I can't leave the apartment. But I digress.

Luckily I don't have to rely on my investment earnings (ed. Gad! Here we go.) Since my Father left me with nothing but a muddied name and 1000 shares of DHX stock, I thought I'd be able to rely on one or the other to provide me with some retirement...cash on hand...pocket money...?

Not that I can complain, but when I got these shares they were like $1.60 each. Against my better judgement I resisted trading them for Nortel stock (ed. who?) and held them for the long term.

And then I watched them fall. And fall. And...why the hell are they falling?!!?11
(ed. cartooney, all those exclamation points and stuff.!!!????)

But you know, it's the world economy so I can't blame the good folks at DHX. Their trying their darn tootinest (ed. Hold on. Is that a word?) to turn a profit for their shareholders. And even though the stock has fallen to a third of it's value (ed. snicker. when you said that out loud it sounded like "turd".) we're looking at the longterm and these folks, in for the long haul have turned to the shareholders who agree that they deserve more recognition (ed. ie. "compensation") than would be normal in the circumstances.

With AIG and Lehman Brothers execs giving themselves huge performance budgets, though now in desperate need of government bailouts, the good folks at DHX feel dfferent, although in the same way.

Just because they were going to "cash in their chips" which in my mind means receive the recognition they deserve, financially speaking, (ed. What? There's a run at the bank?)and sell out to E1, it doesn't mean they shouldn't be compensated for their previous hard work and the hard work yet to come.

DHX's Court and Demune "earned" (ed. quotation marks mine)a 51% and 42% raise last year. Sounds like a lot until you realize that it ends up as a yearly salary of $354,808 and $454,000 respectively. Which still, sounds like a lot until you realize that includes a bonus of $100,000 amd $50,000 respectively. (ed. Note to Demune, seems like your ass is dragging.)

Closer to home Charles "the Green Arrow" Bishop, received a 27% raise with a $50,000 bonus (ed. what? Did they happen to have bonus currency made up in $50,000 increments?) Our industrious leader Michael Donovan received the same as did Financial guru Dana Landry (ed. he takes all the numbers and adds them up good. Couldn't a student intern do that?)

But bottom line, some might say, it seems like a lot to pay the executives of DHX, especially in light that the stock is at a third of what it was (ed. or a "turd") but it all has to be taken into context. (ed. Lets not even talk about the $2.2M loss from Shake Hands With the Devil. Which is the number they say publicaly, which may be a different number internally, but that's how it goes.)

The provincial funding agency, last year "invested" (ed. like it will ever see a "return". Free money everybody!), $165,000 in The Mighty Jungle 2. An animated or puppetated kids show for CBC. So that pays for a chunk of those bonus'es.

Secondly, being a democratic organization, the most votes gets to say whether all these bonuses are deserved or not.

And, although my 1000 vote voice is hopefully heard, the majority shareholder, Michael, outvotes and outlives them all.

Tomorrow: YTV series for Halifax, (ed. not really Halifax) and whatever happened to that spelling bee show? And that John Wing Pilot?

Somebody's Frozen My Assets

2009-01-27T23:44:00.000-03:00

Can't blog. Some...force...making..it...difficult. So much to type...ugh

Halifax Film, Nooooooooo!

2008-09-29T10:41:00.002-03:00

Well, breaking news this morning chums. My editor today is my friend Lunchmeat Harold. Try and keep up Lunchmeat, this is immense. (Ed. Check!) Halifax Film aka DHX has been sold to a company out west called Entertainment 1 which is the latest monster distributor to emerge from the goo since Aliance Atlantis.

What does this mean to you dear reader? No offence but I don't know and don't care. I care about me,(ed. and me?)

Allnovascotia.com reports the deal will pay $1.59 a share (ed. Full disclosure, the author owns 1000 shares.), which is fine, especially considering the stocks were at .80 something last week. But I was holding on to my shares for my retirement (ed. from what?), I was going to ride the wave to comfort in my old age, soft food to eat, cosmos by the carton and disposible Depends. But alas, although DHX will continue to run, the ship will have to do without a captain.

Michael Donovan is not staying on.

I'm shattered, I'm numb (ed. Could be the breakfast cosmopolitans).

Where will the guidence come from? Will Charles (The Green Arrow) Bishop and Cheryl Hasson continue to pilot the ship to financial and creative apexes, quarter after quarter?

As they say in television, stay tuned.

A Little Dis, A Little Dat

2008-09-23T20:31:00.005-03:00

Still have not heard anything but rumours about Jeff Rosen leaving Halifax Film. Hopefully they're still friends and promise to call each other every second week to "catch up." and say "I miss you too." Plus, it would open the door for me to step in, with my background in children's television. (Ed. Nobody even remembers who The Littlest Hobo was.)

But I worry it's another sign that Halifax Film is diversifying, which would leave me out in the cold. (Ed. Maybe they'll rent you a sweater.)

That's my editor Lunchmeat Harold who's not quite the fan of the good folks at Halifax Film as I am. (Ed. Don't suck up just because you have a thousand shares of stock!)

But seriously, Halifax Film has focused on children's entertainment and been so sucessful at it that well, they just can't sell any more. Cheap broadcasters just wait for the kids to grow up, the next generation's on the assembly line and they just start the series over again.

So what to do? Well, they did just hire Chris Zimmer as Head of Development though all he's done is feature films. We have dipped our toes in that pool before with Shake Hands with the Devil.

Halifax Film is currently producing a mini-series entitled Sould for Vision. (ed. who knew).

Then there's that Spelling Bee show. Sure it's got kids in it but its got to have the parents in mind.

They've hired Gary Vermeer away from ACTRA. He knows every actor in the tri-state area.

What these means folks is that Halifax Film is about to explode with richy goodness. Sell your children and buy some stock because we're going to take over all the demographics fairly soon.

Breaking News! Jeff Rosen Leaving Halifax Film?

2008-09-21T22:09:00.002-03:00

The man behind all of Halifax Films kid's shows, essentially CBC mornings is rumoured to leaving. But why? Fired? Quiting? Buddist Monestary?

Must do more snoping.

...And Now ......The Rest of The Story. The story of Halifax Film and Television

2008-09-19T21:01:00.006-03:00

Hi Folks,

Don't have much time to blog tonight, just fifteen minutes, "MAX! And you won't get on tomorrow night if it's one minute over!". As you all know I haven't blogged in a while, I've been "away" and sort of missed out on a lot that's been happening. But once I got caught up, Boy! I missed a lot this summer. (Ed. And how!) WTF does that even mean "And How", ? That's my editor logged in miles away, Lunchmeat Harold.

But most of what's happened is good news for the industry in the province and by the industry I mean Halifax Film and by the province I mean Eastern Canada. And just so I'm not accused of bias I will volunteer that I am a shareholder. (ed. He holds 1000shares)

So point by point, here we go:

Point I - I am somewhat disappointed in NSFDC (ed. you mean Film Nova Scotia) in that they only gave Halifax Film $165,000 for the whole year ending 2008. That was for The Mighty Jungle II (Ed. Missed Mighty Jungle I but apparently there needed to be a sequel). Luckily we got $165,000 last year for the same show. (Ed. ?) And $135,000 for Mighty Jungle I. Plus $150,000 for Animal Mechanicals (ED. I, II ???). But again that was last year. 2008, all we got was less than barely a percentage of a million.

Is that why they took the word "Development" out of the agency? Really, though $25M then $17M was raised through the markets and NSBI chipped in $2M to attract asia cartoonists to the province, there is still a need to develop the company into a viable entity. Just some cash until we're on a stable footing. At least we can count on the tax credit for a few million and then we don't have to give any of the profits (ed. no such thing in this business!) back to the government (Ed. and the people, don't forget the people) from all the overseas sales, because they own a stake in the show.

It wouldn't be so hard to swallow if Ocean Entertainment (ed. Who?) hadn't received $500,000! for two cooking shows! Cooking shows? How much Dilled Salmon is that, Michael Smith? (Ed. Whay are you bringing that up? I've never dilled a salmon, and I resent the implication.)

Point II - Chris Zimmer has abandoned his business (Ed. Man overboard!). Actually he sold it to yours truly (Ed. Actually, Halifax Film), for like $1M. Which seems like a lot when you consider the jewel in the crown is a 20 year old Rita McNeil in Japan Special. Really, what's the shelf life on that? But in addition Zimmer is joining the crew at Halifax Film (ed. Yeah! Jump on in the water's fine!) as the head of development. (ed. Doesn't that make like seventeen people in cahrge of development? What are we running here an orphanage?)

The news release stated that Chris (Ed. Mr. Zimmer!), would develop more kids shows. But he's never produced a kid's show. His expertise iis in feature films. (ed. What are you suggesting?)

Point III - Gary Vermer has been the face and voice of ACTRA in Nova Scotia for the past ten? years and has decided to chuck that nonsense in. He has joined the team at Halifax Film! Yeah! (ed. - Am I detecting a trend here?

Point IV - Collideascope closes up its doors. The youngish team of M.A. Kuttner and Steven Comeau is calling it quits. These were the young turks of the industry (ed. That was years ago and nobody likes an Old Turk.). They're cartoon machine churned out a lot of service work and original productions so I'm curious as to why they're stopping and what they're going to do. (ed. Hmmm, wonder where, I wonder?)

Anyway, it's almost lights out so I'm signing off. ttfn. (ed. Try the Fussilli, Ned?

...And We're Back!

2008-09-09T15:35:00.001-03:00

Took a little vacation but now we're back and just in time! Been a lot happening in the film and TV game in Halifax/Nova Scotia and we'll be commenting on all of it over the next few days.

Big Things in Store for CBC!

2008-05-07T16:37:00.004-03:00

My sister's boyfriend Carlo has returned and cause he's rich and feeling guilty about walking out on Stella, he brought all kinds-o-gifts! For Stella, he's brought flowers, chocolates, and enough Bling that he must have denudded East-side L.A. of gold chains.

For my editor, Lunchmeat Harold, (ed. Howdy!) he had a "Red" camera delivered. Lunchmeat is an amatuer moviemaker (ed. Filmmaker!)and thought he was doing the world of art a service by making a 300 part documentary on how a bright red shirt gradually devolves and loses its colour after continuous washings. Each part, he's filmed 125 so far, doesn't show the whole washing machine cycle, he fast motions them down to 5 minutes each. (ed. the whole cycle would be kind of silly, don'tcha think?). And for even more artistic integrity he shot them on a Fisher-Price Camcorder from the seventies. But now he has this professional "Red" video camera and he's ecstatic. I have no idea what's so special about it, but there's a button on it that says Time Shift, which I'm hoping allows him to see the future. (ed. and it is mine!)

Carlo brought a gift for Karlie too, a bag of white powder, which is unfortunate because Karlie has (ed. Had) gone eight weeks without a sniff, injection, inhallation, or insertion of any kind of narcotic. Carlo meant well, but she immediately retreated to her room (ed. which is actually just a pantry with tufts of grass in it for bedding.) and now all we can hear is the sound of snorting followed by some religious exclamations.

(ed. she's praying at the Church of the Holy Jesus Look at the Colours!)

And Carlo boght me a huge flat screen tv/computer monitor, to replace the one we had to give the super in exchange for a months rent. It's fantastic and the first thing I did was go to the CBC on-line store and order the complete Air-Farce boxed DVD collection before they all sell out. (ed. that's the set with the mini chicken canon). And believe me on this humongus set, all the items in the store look big. Hence the title of this entry. (ed. oh, man, a long way and too much exposition for that bit.)

And for his son/daughter, Carlo brought a $1M worth of toys. And I'm not being unliteral.

And just because he's an inbred royal, Carlo also brought a small mammal-like critter, not unlike a tiny elephant with a half-trunk, if you will. Apparently they are endangered and illegal to catch and send outside the country but Carlo has access to some sort of diplomatic pouches. Hence another endangered species gets closer to the brink of extinction. I was going to protest but the thing just smelled so good while it was roasting.

But now back to what this blog is really supposed to be about. TV!

Corner Gas is calling it quits and Trailer Park Boys is done. Strange, in the past the networks would just put a lock on the door at the end of the shooting but now people seem interested in what's happening.

My CTF bulliten collector sent me a message that the Fund had "found" $12M. WTF? Did it fall out of Jim Shaw's pocket when he was sitting on the couch there while he was waiting to see the A Team?

More stuff soon as the baby is trying to sleep and is startled by keystrokes.

Quarter pounders

Halifax Film? Who Needs Ya? Not me!

2008-05-05T21:04:00.004-03:00

As I blogged last night, things have careened into an entirely new direction. First let me intro my editor tonight Lunchmeat Harold (ed. Howdy!).

Things had gotten a bit desperate around here after I lost my job, my sister Stella got pregnant and couldn't work and my roommate Karly, couldn't quit cold turkey the Jones', if you know what I mean.

I had tried to restart my writing career and sent numerous show ideas to Halifax Film, the world's most important animated children's content provider. (ed. they make cartoons, and your host owns 1000 shares so he's a bit biased.)

Nevertheless, although I sent numerous pitches to the company, they have been apparently too busy ignoring them to reply. And although Karlie could get out of bed to pay the rent (ed. actually, no. That's where she made the rent.) other expenses like food, electricity, the latest House DVD box set. (ed. thank God for Showcase) suffered. But now I don't need them.

Things are looking up, up, up! Last Thursday, Stella went into convultions, (ed. contractions) and fearing an "Alien" type explosion of a fetus from her chest and skuteling across the floor, (ed. that would have been so cool!) I called 911. Minutes later, the ambulance jockies appeared and soon had my sister's half-Brazillian in their grasp. (ed. the father is Brazillian.)

They took my sister and her baby to the hospital for a few days, and when they came back, Carlo was with them! He's the Father and I never thought I would be so happy to see him. Apparently the tribe he comes from in Brazil has such fine tuned homing instincts that he knew Stella was going to birth his prodegy. And he tracked her down. And coming from Royalty and money, (ed. his family were hill people who squatted over a mound of earth holding a Quintillion gallons of oil), he brought gifts.

Sorry but I have to log-off and help with the baby. S/he's so cool. More tomorrow. Oh, and stuff about TV, too.

Halifax Film? More Important Stuff, I suppose. (?)

2008-05-03T22:05:00.003-03:00

God, I love question marks in brackets as if, it may be a question or it may mean I know more than you. Or do I?

Hi Folks,

I know its been a while since I blogged but thing have been popping around here, and I mean that literally. My sister Stella has reproduced! And her Brazillian has reappeared. I'll be back to update tomorrow especially for the guy who keeps e-mailing about my dog Biscuitface. He's fine! Okay? There's humans in peril here too, ya know!

Can It Get Any Bigger Than This?

2008-04-03T14:59:00.009-03:00

Well folks, after a brief hiatus (ed. thats TV talk for a break), I'm back. A lot of things have been happening since the last time I posted so before my afternoon siesta, let's start with the good news. My friend Lunchmeat Harold will be editing for me tonight. (Ed. Howdy)

Why is my friend and mentor Michael Donovan smiling whilst grasping his little man? For good reason. His company (ed. and yours. Full disclosure, the author owns 1000 shares of DHX/Halifax Film/Decode etc. etc. mega-monopoly), has been signing deals here there and everywhere including Spain! They've partnered up with a Spanish production company to produce "Poppets Town" which is apparently a 2D animated series for children and not a show about a drug inhalers in a gay spa!

It's been sold around the world and assuming it's being made with Nova Scotia taxpayer dollars through the Film Tax Credit I guess we're all going to be part-owners. (Ed. sorry, those tax credits are just producer money.) Oh, right. Well at least it will make for a healthy bottom line which is what the entertainment industry is all about.

DHX/Halifax Film/Decode (Ed. Just type DHX before you snap your wrists) also bought a chain of fitness centres for kids called Bulldog Interactive. Imagine with me, a scaled down NuBody's where toddlers and up, enjoy a good workout of their lats and pecs and whathaveyous on the stairmaster or that crazy bicycle where you peddle and peddle but don't go anywhere! Little Jimmy chatting up little Janie as they complain that you just can't get workout togs in sizes 6 to 8 that don't have a cartoon character on them. Except of course for Lunar Jim, Poco which just happen to be on all the flat screened TV's in an endless loop! Why the gym shoppes (ed. oh, with a "pe", classy.) will be forced to carry all the toys and gadgets and clothes and zit creams with our shows logos on them. As a shareholder, this makes me moist. A captive audience with disposible income to spare. I'm assuming that their parents take them here to see and be seen rather than have the tykes get all dirty in their backyards like we had to do.

DHX (ed. thanks) also secured a deal with The Family Channel to produce a season of "The Latest Buzz", (ed. also not a show about the latest pharmachuticals). It's a show about teens who mock authority and rock their world while putting together a student newspaper. This is nothing like Radio Free Roscoe which a show about teens who mock authority and rock their world while putting together a student radio station. Radio - newspaper. Different, see.

In other DHX news (ed. Do you ever write about anything else?), they are producing or have produced a spelling bee show for kid's. Now some may say this was a fad that's come and gone (ed. yeah like two heartwarming movies, a documentary and already a bunch of reality shows like it!), but I like to think of it as a "re-magining, kinda like Battlestar Gallactica. (ed. If they were up against spelling cyborgs, that would be interesting.) But anyway it was done at the local CBC, so it didn't cost us anything. And it used up studio space, resources, crew that would just have gone to make some other pilot for a non-conglomorate producer. In fact it seems to be a right of passage that springtime brings another DHX pilot that will never see the light of day; "Rhymes With Canuck", (ed. another 're-magining of an improv show, years after "Whose Line"), "The Thing About" and others that are good practice.

Interesting to note that Cheryl Hasson, the COO of Halifax Film, was the one quoted in today's paper announcing the spelling show. There's been little of her in the public eye since she joined DHX. Her last job was head of development for CBC Kids where she green-lit such excellent shows as Poco, Lunar Jim and Bo on the Go. Now co-incidentily she's the COO of DHX who produce Poco, Lunar Jim and Bo on the Go.

But its'not all about DHX this week, though it should be. A German-Canadian co-production called Sea-Wolf is starting to shoot in May in Electropolois (Ed. watch out for the rats!)and another series called "G-Spot" will soon start shooting in Dartmouth. (Ed. I've been looking in the wrong place! The G-Spot's in Datmouth? Who'd a thunk it?) Both are being produced by Big Motion Picture company who also produced Trudeau. But The G-Spot's not a new show, it was a series on Showtime or Bravo and I believe it was produced by someone else. Curious.

Watched Sophie last night on CBC and it realy wasn't my cup of tea. Though I did read that it won a Peabody Award which I guess is good. I just had no idea that dog gave out awards. I wonder if his boy, Sherman was at the awards.

And the Air Farce was cancelled. Can't say I'm surprised, I think it's audience has been dying off over the last few years.

I guess that's it for now.

Halifax Film Stuff. Hast Thou Forsaken Me?

2008-03-12T20:02:00.006-03:00

Yes, I know it's been a while since I blogged but, so what.

My friend Lunchmeat Herold is with me to edit (ed. Hello), not just for grammar and spelling but so I don't go off on a tangent or perhaps an angry tirade! (ed. calm down and have another cosmopolitan.)

Lunchmeat has been a real friend since I lost my job, bringing food and drink to myself, my sister Stella, and my roommate Carly. Neither of whom, I will say with restraint, has brought any money into the household for the past several months. I know I'm not one to talk, but a major limitation for me is my inability to leave the house. Makes putting a Happy Meal together a bit difficult if John, Jane and little Jimmy Average Citzen has to come to my apartment.

But at least Carly has been helping out rent - wise. Our super has been letting us glide on the rent, well my big screen TV helped pay for a few months, but a few minutes with Carly in her room seems to extend the inevitable kicking to the curb. What they do in there I don't want to know, I'm just picturing some sort of fully clothed massage for want of the grimy obvious.

Anyway, I've been sending show concepts, what we used to call "pitches", to Halifax Film/DHX/Decode/Studio B for the past several months. As many of you know, I used to be a writer a while ago, (ed. wasn't it you who sent The Littlest Hobo on to another town, that time?) And since I am a shareholder in DHX, I thought they would at least set up a meeting, teleconference is fine, I can set up the CN Tower backdrop behind me, if need be. But not a word. Not a single PFO thank you'ish response to my e-mails. Maybe they're too busy backing some sort of charity event happening in town. Now as an owner, (ed. co) I'm not sure I like this sudden keenness with helping others. Especially if it hurts the bottom line. Halifax Film/DHX has never before shown this wimpy side where they help the "less fortunate". Damn, let them lobby the government for tax credits and funding. Why try and cut into our pie?

But you know what? Despite the fact that I haven't heard from my compadres is not going to me down. I'm fully back into the writing mode, and I've been working on a project to pitch to a major Canadian broadcaster; Global Television. Since they bought AA, they have a lot of channels to fill with Canadian content, besides the teressterial (ed. huh?). This is the network that brought you original content such as The Jane Show (ed. cancelled), Falcon Beach (ed. cancelled.), and , um, (ed. not much else Canadian is tehre?). Quiet Ed. Surely the CRTC will flex their muscles and my point will be proven that they will be looking for Canadian content soon. Sweet Jesus.

But enough about me, this blog is about Canadian television (ed. and film? right?)

Speaking of film, I was outraged when I learned (actually fell asleep during the E!cast) that the 12 Genie nominations that Shake Hands With the Devil earned, all it took home was best music? I didn't even notice there was music . Not that I want them to rescind the award but this is our Schindler's List people. At least best screenplay should have won. Omagine how hard it is to take a book and write a movie with it? Especially if you've never written two words together to make a sentence before in your life. Talk about a challanging movie!

Watched Billable Hours the other night. I like this show. Sometimes its over the top but they say the F word as if they are real people. It gives me a warm canadian feel while entertaining me. huh. Funny.

Meanwhile, CBC cancelled, Jpod, never saw it, and MVP, never saw that one either but the ads made it seem like plastic people screwing each other literally and figuratively. CBC cancelled both because of low ratings. Wow. Kudos for knowing when to cut and run. i must say, the new CBC, actually seems to have an agenda to put on entertaining programming that a lot of people like. I'm not sure what this new approach is called but I think other businesses may learn something from this new concept.

I saw a show called Good Morning World, actually I saw two episodes over the last few weeks. This does not renew my faith in The Comedy Network which was already severly crippled when The Butcher Brothers premiered. I googled the two stars and they seem to have a very good pedigree, comedy wise, Second City, where you still have to be good to stand out. But what would have made a really good 4 minute sketch seems to have been stretched into a 26 x 1/2 hour series. I watched it open mouthed.

I can understand The Comedy Network buying in because it looks reasonably inexpensive to shoot. Canadian? Done.

Dave Thomas is one of the producers and although he is a God to me, I'm thinking this may just have been a paycheck for him.

I'd Just Like to Hold It. Oscar Night!

2008-02-24T21:57:00.008-03:00

Haven't blogged in a while but there's not much to report in the "biz" in Nova Scotia. Well except for the fact the oscars are touching the province because of the lovely and talented Ellen Page. We are of course tuned in and Ellen (ed. first name basis?) was just interviewed and I must say she held her own on the silly red carpet interview. Speaking of holding your own and touched by Oscar (c) let's not forget the past achievements the Academy has bestowed on Nova Scotians.

Michael Donovan Cradles His Little Oscar

And let me say it is robbery that Shake Hands With the Devil has not been nominated. A tragic compeling story, well made, well acted...I don't know. You think at least they would have had a special award for writing, seeing as Mr. Donovan wrote it all by himself! No small feat considering he's never written drama before! And hurrahs for the producer taking a chance on an unknown writer.

Speaking of which, I still have not heard anything back from Halifax Films concerning a number of pitches I've sent in over the past few weeks for new kids shows. Since I lost my job, and my extremely pregnant sister has been living here not bringing in any money and my roommate, Karly, still hasn't found a job (ed. hard to get a Timmy's job where the only thing on your resume is "crack dealer".) The references usually don't return phone calls.) things have been a bit dicey. Rent, food, electricity..., I thought if I was able to sell Halifax Film on a show concept...I'm sure they'll get back to me soon. I even came up with another pitch:

Hamma Montana - animated - a teen-age pig lives a double life an an ordinary teen pig and a superstar pig calling contestant. (ed. Does she solve crimes?)

But anyway, my pal Lunchmeat Herold, also my editor tonight (ed. Howdy) has shown up to watch the oscars tonight and he brought my favorite Quarter Pounder with Cheese and all the fixin's for cosmopolitans, my drink of choice since the Mooseheads came to town.

So far Jon Stewart has done his monologue and a few awards that no one cares about have been awarded (ed. Best Red Dress (female)?), so we're going to settle in and watch Ellen win. (ed. I hope she doesn't. She's too sweet, it'll ruin her)

May blog later depending on what happens and how fortified the cosmopoltans are.

So with that, we're settled in to watch the Oscars (s)

Halifax Film and TV Stuff - Is February a Blue Month or a Red Month?

2008-02-07T20:54:00.000-03:00

Warning: The following may be depressing.

I hate February. Always did. Especially now, even though I don't leave the apartment at any time of the year, knowing that I can't, in this dreariest of dreary months, makes time crawl by. And sharing the place with my increasingly pregnant and exponentially erratically behaving sister and roommate Carly, the detoxing crack wench, well, the sunshine ain't shining out of any orifice. I especially feel sorry for my dog Bicuitface, he should be out romping with bunnies instead of stuck in this godforsaken space.

But then, so should I.

Money grows increasingly tight since none of the UnBrady Bunch is bringing in any cash.

Anyway, enough of being a "downer". I have to keep a positive outlook. I'm hoping to hear back soon from the Halifax Film Company about several proposals I sent in for kids television shows. I e-mailed them off several weeks ago and haven't heard back yet but I'm sure they're working their way up the ladder.

I'll bet once they fall on the desk of Charles "the Green Arrow" Bishop, he'll be calling me up to negotiate the worldwide marketing and distribution rights. I won't play hardball, given this would be my first solo project but the one after that...

I'm not sure what kind of deal wunderkind Jeff Rosen has, but given the dolars he's put in the pockets of Halifax Film from a number of projects, I'm sure he's plugged in to a percentage of the gross.

Though I am positive Halifax Film and I will walk hand in hand down the garden path of a meaningful relationships, I don't want to risk being led into the bushes on the first date with the first "fella" with a good lookin' set of assets. Maybe I should pitch other companies like Decode or Studio B, just to cover all my bases. Nothing like a bidding war to make things interesting.

So interesting news that three CANADIAN TV series are being bought by American networks. This hasn't happened since, never, girlfriend. The Listener, Sophie, and The Border. Never saw Sophie, but I did see that Bailey's commercial, over and over sigh...

Saw The Border, and thought it was pretty good, especially the episode with the strippers. Haven't seen The Guard yet, mostly cause I keep thinking its the same show as The Border. Maybe they can just make one show, The Border Guard.

It will be interesting to see what the Americans think of these shows, especially since The Border is unapoligetically and refrshingly Canadian. It'll also be interesting to see what happens if the writers strike gets settled first. But then, the networks are still going to need content while their machine gets up and running. Unless they all call the darn thng off like the NHL season a while back.

On the other hand, if the strike continues, there will probably be more opportunities for Canadian shows south of the border and I'm talking digging into the library, where old shows will produce pure gravy (profit.) Who knows, Blackfly may finally get the attention it deserves. And cause its set in the past, its "evergreen."

That means its timeless, i.e. as good today as it ever was.

Hopefully it will go better than when the NFL went on strike and the Americans watched the CFL. For about 10 minutes.

And speaking of Canadians on American TV, Fox is promoting the hell out of Unhitched the sitcom starring Sean Majumdar (and others). It's produced by the Farrelly brothers, one of whom just sold a house on the south shore of Nova Scotia. The trailers make it look interesting, but the appearance of a baboon makes me kind of go "yeeee." I mean monkeys are funny and all but a sophisticated comedy about the New York dating mileau? I'll give it a try but...

And then the CRTC hearings are under way. They're talking about changing the CTF. Jim Shaw doesn't like it. So the WGC, ACTRA and God knows who else has to sit and justify why Canada needs Canadian shows on Canadian television. Mr. Shaw oversees a large cable conglomerate and last year he held back the money he took in from cable subscribers and refused to give it to the CTF because he didn't like Trailer Park Boys.

BTW, I saw a documentary a few years ago on Ted Rogers another empire builder. As you all know, I'm tremendously interested in how rich people get rich, those guys who fight hard scrabble tooth and nail for what they believe in and work their asses off to succeed. So Ted Rogers explained that he got his first cable license (i.e. a license to print money) because he was a friend of certain politicians. Jesus wept. And he was proud of it.

Anyway, Mr. Shaw, another lottery winner, thinks the CTF should be split into two segments; one for commercial projects and one for "cultural" projects.

Ironically, Trailer Park Boys falls into both.

Like it or not, it is a success. And a huge one. It also reflects our culture. Maybe not Mr. Shaw's but the one thing I constantly read is that people from every walk of life "know someone just like that"!

Quebecor a Quebec company "appeared before the CRTC right after Shaw and again said it should be allowed to put its CTF contributions into a separate fund that it would control.

Company chief Pierre Karl Péladeau pledged to augment the current contributions made by its cable company Videotron from $19 million to $30 million and to spend $100 million over three years. Quebecor would retain copyright to much of the funded programming, and funds would also finance content for video-on-demand, the web and other new media initiatives."

So the cable giant would take the money it collects from subscribers, decide what gets made with it and own the properties.

Just a note, the money that comes in is a part of people's cable bill that is supposed to go to the CTF to develop and produce product for all Canadians.

Qubecor, IT'S NOT YOUR MONEY! It's mine! (If I lived in Quebec, and I would if I were allowed)

That's all for this week.

Halifax Film and TV - Mid Winter

2008-01-31T00:34:00.000-03:00

Sorry, I haven't blogged in a while but things have been kind of "sporadic". Since we ran out of money, the lights, cable, internet etc have been coming and going and the combination necessary to report on TV has not been optimal. (Sorry, I missed "The Border", again.)

Basically, it's been a batt;e of utilities against phone calls to our MP. But he/she (I can't tell from the voice) can't cover us for much longer.

My attempts to pitch Halifax Film with the latest international children's show pitch seems to have fallen on a deaf e-mail in basket.

I've sent several pitches to their general info e-mail but have not heard back. Maybe its time to cash in several favours, though I hate that kind of thing and you don't see it much in film or TV.

But getting through that secure bank wall is the key. If amyone can send me Cheryl (Invisible Lass)'s e-mail address (I've tried phoning, but apparently the girl/guy at the end of the general phone number has not passed along my name or number.) it would be appreciated.

Not knowing the food chain inside Halifax Film, maybe I should send my ideas to Charles (the Green Arrow Bishop) or...dare I...no,I dare not...why not. If someone can give me Michael Donovan`s e-mail (I feel a bit flushed now), I can, um, pitch...him.

Halifax Film / TV Weakly Update (haha, see what I did there? "weakly" cause it's so bad.... ah forget it).

2008-01-23T23:15:00.000-03:00

Anyway..., tonight's blogging is edited by my friend Lunchmeat Herold. (ed. hiya.)

Just to catch up on a bunch of local (ed. and national, international) tv/film stuff.

Saw "The Border" the other night, the CBC's latest drama and I was impressed. It wasn't a "24" ripoff, although it did have action, tension, it was un-awkwardly proudly Canadian. It felt like a british show when they tell stories to fellow brits, ya know? (ed. like from a "canadian" perspective" to Canadian? Crazy.) And none of the police wore bright red coats. I think I'll watch again.

Suzanne Pleshette .... sigh... I wa so sorry to hear of her passing. She was class with a capital K! Funny, confident, sexy...I get the feeling I wasn't the only one who wanted to spend a long car drive across america with her.

The sound stage in Shelburne has been sold. It was built in the day when film and tv was supposed to rescue "underdeveloped" parts of the province, from economic destitution. Now, apparently, I "dissed" Shelburne in a previous blog but it was unintentional. I've never been there but I guess, according to an e-mail I received, it is a haven for "loyalists" and aliens. That's great. (ed. Maybe some people shouldn't throw the word "ignorant" around just because we talk about stuff we don't know anything about, hmmm?)

My subscription to Playback has expired and frankly I don't have the cash to re-new at their new cyber way of doing things. (ed. shouldn't it be cheaper since there's no paper or postage involved? I'm just saying.)

I'm guessing that the facility was sold to a foreigner for much less than it cost the Nova Scotia Government to build. Such is our quaint Maritime way.

Sean Majumder's new sitcom is being advertised and it's on FOX! That's american. I say good for him. The talented Newfoundlander has certainly paid his dues and has the talent to make it in the mainstream of comedy in the states. (ed. that's not an insult.) The show is called "Unhitched" and is run by the Farrelly brothers. (ed. Something about Mary, anyone. I wish I knew the history of Sean's association with the bro's. One of them, Bobby?, had a summer home up here, (just recently sold)
Did Sean and Bobby?, hang out up here? Who knows. Did they have anything to do with Bobby Curtola checking out of the province? (ed. Not likely. Not even a tenuous connection there, why bring it up?)

In personal news, we've managed to stave off eviction. Briefly, I owe back rent because I recently lost my job, the roommate I brought in has turned out to be a drug dealer who was not very good at her career and my sister, well, she's more of a giver than an earner. So, sad to say, the big screen tv is gone. This is hard to talk about but, heck, sacrifices have to be made. (In actuality the TV wasn't even mine; it was my sister's Brazillian boyfriend/impregnator, so I'm not really behind.) Still, other bills have to be paid.

Now, in a previous career, I used to write for children's television. That, plus the fact that I own shares in DHX aka Halifax Film, (ed.1000 shares), I figured I could pitch them on some show concepts. Alas, I have not heard back on any of my pitches.

But, my mentor, Michael Donoven, the ceo of said DHX, has inspired me to rise up and continue in my quest. In last Thursday's Chronicle Herald (I admit, I borrow it from the fetal alcohol people from up the hall, but I always return it!), Michael was speaking to a business conference at Dalhousie and he said that "failure is the key to sucess". Can you imagine that the Oscar (tm) winner was saying that failure is a key to the elevator of sucess? Hell, I should be heading to the 10000th floor!

He says that Tv and film is usually a 6:1 failure to sucess ratio. So for all the six taxpayer funded productions DHX, the publically listed corporation, will have one success. I don't think you have better odds than Vegas, especially when you are losing other people's money but winning yours.

So. learning from this, I've previously sent DHX four premises and now I have two more "ideas" for other kids shows. (ed. after all that is the business we want to monopolize.)

Ricky the Acerbic Clam - Bitter and sarcastic bottom feeders resent those who eat in the shallow pool. (and they solve mysteries/crimes.)

Mariska, the Idealistic Filmmaker - Mariska does odd jobs (ed. collecting bottles, eating glass for money, and whoring) in order to finance her independant films in which she seeks to entertain and inform. Genre: Fantasy. In the first episode, we introduce her nemesis Heryl Chasion, the rich dilitant, who refuses to respond to our heroine`s pleas for help.

So that`s it for this weak. Just a note, I started this blog as an information centre for tv and film makers in halifax to share their knowledge and experiences. But lately, the only responses I`ve received have be haraunging e-mails. I`m thinking that I`m just wasting my time. Anybody out there?

Week 2, 2008. Halifax Film TV Stuff

2008-01-17T20:05:00.000-03:00

Not much going on in good old Nova Scotia Film and TV business, though regular life is starting to take a downturn. My friend Maurice will be editing tonight. (ed. Howdy.)

Watched Oprah last night, and let me tell you some people just shouldn't be in large screen HD. She's an attractive woman but for some reason she just looks judgemental and she makes me feel guilty. I don't know why. I'm not a regular viewer, I just tuned in to see the lovely and talented Ellen Page. But the show wasted a lot of time on Marion Davies (ed. Boo, hoo, I used steroids, lied about it, got caught and I'm really sorry, I did it to be an example of what children should not do. So can I stay out of prison?) So there wasn't much time for Ellen, especially after Jennifer Garner came out and gushed about everything from her baby to her life and husband, who I believe is Bart Affleck. So a waste of time for me.

But I read in the paper that a real feature film (ed. as opposed to a Lifetime quicky) is coming to N.S. Katie Holmes (ed. some people can't help being crazy, but you should know better than to marry a crazy person.), Woody Harrelson, and the Fabulous! Eddie Izzard! That cross-dressing fool! He is a riot, check out this little bit:

The CBC started it's new flashier programming last week with the premiere of jPod, The Border, and Sophie. It appears they are doing well, numbers wise; I really should watch them at some point.

The CBC also ordered more Animal Mechanicals, another animated show from the mind of Jeff Rosen (Poko, Bo on the Go). Hopefully he's being well paid for filling the coffers of DHX aka Halifax Film, his creations fill CBC morning and sell around the world. But, on the other hand as a shareholder, (1000 shares @ $1.62!), I hope he's on salary and not in for a percentage of the profits. In fact I never see his name when DHX is handing out stocks and options to the Board.

Anyway, speaking of my stocks, I'm a bit concerned. As loyal readers know, I inheirited the stocks when my Father died in Kamloops last year. I didn't go to the service as I can't leave the apartment, but my sister Stella went as the East Coast family rep. She's the one who told me Dad's lawyers told her I was going to get the stock. But since then, I've heard nothing. Shouldn't I get some of those big old certificates in the mail or something?

And it's kind of important now as I may have to cash them in to pay the rent. Since I lost my job and Stella been too busy gestating to earn money, things have gotten a bit tight. I hoped taking in a roommate would have helped and it did at first when Carly was selling non-perscription medication, through a slot in our front door, but she's become another drain since she found Jesus. And believe me finding him in this apartment was quite the success; there's just not thatmany places to hide.

But Mr. Mzykenick (ed. wasn't he that little imp that gave Superman so much trouble?), our super, informed me in a series of grunts and clicks (ed. he's from one of those eastern europeon countries that have more consonents in their names than he does.), that we were three months behind in our rent.

I had sent some show pitches into DHX, hoping that they would champion my kids show ideas but I haven't heard anything back. That would at least solve my immediate money problems. Other than that selling the stock, that I don't have proof that I actually own, seems to be the only alternative. I'm working on some more, that's I'll send in tomorrow after some "polishing."

"Lincoln Blogs - Although Abraham Lincoln is dead he's still able to channel his spirit through a Blog, to help 10 year old Tommy LeChastelain solve moral delemas and issues in his life, his school and his vollyball team. Together, they also solve crimes."

"Gibbons From Space - Earth is invaded by flatulent monkeys from space who create havoc with their hi-jinks. One of them opens a detective agency and solves crimes in San Francisco."

I sent my other ones to the general e-mail address for DHX but maybe I should try higher (ed. no offense). If only I knew Charles "the Green Arrows" contact information. I know he recognizes genius, when he sees it.

Canada at Sundance: A Halifax Perspective. And Other Cra*

2008-01-09T23:15:00.000-03:00

We received an e-mail from Telefilm trumpeting the Canadian entries playing at Sundance this year.

Me thinks I see a theme:

Thoughtful introspection. And because they're mostly National Film Board presentations there's naturallly no Canadian perspective. (ed. 'member all those National Film Board films we all saw in school when we were kids!? Yeah me neither.)

But being Canadian, we're not all about just sittin' and thinkin'...

There's always death and zombies! Jesus weeps. But at least he has a positive bent. Can we not present a Porky's or a Meatballs to the world to show that we're not all zombies and/or weeping all the time?

My friend "Lunchmeat Herold" has dropped over to help me with tonights blog, he'll be the editor (ed. Hiya). He brought a tape of Ellen Page on David Letterman's show last week and I must say I am absolutely charmed by this young lady. In a career as diverse as Pit Pony, Juno, Trailer Park Boys and X-Men she drove the interview and Dave for once, had to hang on for the ride. She talked about Halifax and living here on a positive note. The pretty, talented, and real (ed. and hot, not a package you see together too often), Ms. Page was smart, (ed.and a little nervous, understandebly, but it was real and endearing.) And gladly, Dave played along. He really is good with people who are real!

Anyhoo, although Lunchmeat may be on some sort of love connection (actually, I think she's T-riffic too), other things have been fairly quiet. I sent my story/series ideas into DHX aka Halifax film for evaluation and I'm just waiting to hear back from their creative department. (ed. I imagine they have a lot of playrights/screenrighters that look over all proposals.)

2007 - That All Ya Got!!

2008-01-03T16:19:00.000-03:00

So, I haven't blogged for a while due to rolling blackouts throughtout my apartment, possibly due to the fact that the power (ed. "hydro" to you Ontario readers) bill hasn't been paid. Anyway gave me plenty of time to think of my present state most of which is due to events in the last year, 2007. let's see:

- My Father died (not that he was ever a great provider, in fact he owed me money. One day he just showed up at my apartment in L.A. and said he needed money to pay off a mean house and her meaner pump. Something like that, I may have mis-interpreted as I was pretty "coked" in those days. But anyway, your Father's always your Dad, right?)

- My live in sister, Stella let a Brazillian exchange student live here and he lasted just long enough to get her pregnant.

- I lost my job as a rep for a medical supply/pharmasutical. (ed. "sic", I think I know why you lost the job.) As I can't leave the apartment, it was perfect for me as it was all done on-line.

- With bills piling up, I found a roommate, Carly who, though I didn't approve of her career (ed. What? You sold drugs, she sold drugs...albeit, she sold them through a slot through a steel door...)she had money to pay the rent. That was until she went cold turkey, quit using and selling and found the Love of Jesus over Christmas. Now the Love of Jesus is great but it doesn't pay that well.

- My dog Biscuitface, needs an operation. Something non-specific (ed. not cancer!) that costs a lot of money.

All of this going on in a one-bedroom apartment (ed. ...in the sky-hiii!)

With things not looking so great, I decided to return to one of my old skills that I don't have to leave the apartment for - writing. Although my meat and potatos in my day was on the technical side of production, I did write a few kids shows before becoming a producer and getting others to write for me for free. (Hey, don't criticize, everyone did it and those kids really appreciated the break. In fact some of them have moved quite far onward and upward, but for some reason they don't return my calls.)

And since I own shares in DHX (ed. aka Halifax Film) it seemed to be a perfect opportunity to pitch a kid's show. Especially after they bought Decode and Studio B. (ed. did anyone else get Monopoly for Christmas? The tv production company edition? If you choose the writer's token you have to roll the dice with no dots on them.)

So I've written up the following pitches for some animated children's shows that I'm going to send in:

Kabuki Kats - A band of Cats bring their travelling theatre and perform for peasant villages throughout feudal Japan. They also solve crimes and somehow always manage to get themselves in crazy adventures.

Rhino-Plasti - In the modern jungle of Hollywood, Dr. Plasti, an African rhino plastic surgeon, caters to the whims of an elite range of Hollywood celebrities; Lindsey Lohan's freckle fetish, Tara Reid's "un"-lobotomy (ed. technically brain surgery, not plastic surgery) and a penis lengthening for Britteny.

He also solves crime and has adventures in space.

Oscar the Crime Fighting Dog (still working on this but he solves crimes.)

So I'm going to edit these a bit and send them in to my friends and see what happens. TV money is the best money.

I'm Awake! Halifax Film / TV Blog

2007-12-19T23:12:00.000-03:00

Okay, so my roommate Carly seems to have sweated out enough toxins that she's able to function on a semi-normal mindset. She's been taking my dog Biscuitface, out for walks, much to his relief, mine and probably the whole floor of our apartment building. And as a special treat she's been able to make the trip to Burger King for daily nourishment; Whoppers with Cheese. Really, all major food groups are faux represented here.

My sister Stella continues to gestate (ed. though you can't really tell where the baby starts and the Quarter Pounder with Cheese ends.) and there's still no sign of her former Brazillian boyfriend. Surprise, surprise. Another unproven hit and run. I love my sister Stella, but she lies around all day, watching Brazillian television and eating. True not much different than when she wasn't pregnant but she's become so complacent in her life...I think she's in for a hugely rude awakening soon.

As Carly has been out of commission, earnings wise, and Stella really hasn't ever earned any sort of living, it's up to me to bring home the bacon. (ed. even though you can'y leave the apartment to bring anything home and bacon on a Whopper with Cheese is extra.)

So I've decided to get out my old IBM Selectric (ed. Its like a PC only you only see words after they're printed out.) and write for tv like I used to. Being a shareholder in DHX aka Halifax Film, I think I may have an "in". Unfortunately, the ideas are not forthcoming. All I've come up with is a show called "Dora On The Go", where an animated girl talks to the audience to try and solve a puzzle i.e. quest. She has an animal sidekick who may or my not be wearing boots. Ah, they'll never go for that.

Speaking of Halifax Film, I woke up in a sweat last night because something reminded me that "we" may be in violation of the tax credit rules. Though we've raised $25M and then another $17M through investors, and another $2M through the Nova Scotia Business Inc. (ed. i.e. taxpayer dollars) I remembered that back in the initial days of the Nova Scotia Film and Video Tax Credit, there was a limit as to how much a company could be worth before getting more taxpayer dollars through the credit. This arcahic rule said that any company that was worth more than $25M shouldn't be accessing taxpayer dollars like they were some kind of welfare mother or something (ed. hello, people on welfare just got a $4/month raise! What more do they want?)

So I was quite relieved when I found that section had been deleted from the applicable legislation; phew. (ed. Is that the gov't's fiscal or ours? And when did we go public? Oh, never mind, film and tv is sexy and the best photo-op in the world!)

Now that section of the act says:

(a) the corporation is incorporated under the laws of Canada or a province of Canada and is a taxable Canadian corporation primarily carrying on business that is a film or video production business; (snore, Michael Donovan's a lawyer and he can hire someone to do this in their sleep)
(b) the corporation has a permanent establishment in Nova Scotia; (can you get more permanent than a bank? Well, how about one of Michael's two houses? Or Charles "the Green Arrow" Bishop's) (ed. I'd hate that, never knowing which house had my lucky socks in them.))

(c) at least 25% of salaries and wages of the corporation are eligible salaries. (again, Michael has taken care of this.)

I guess the gov't woke up and smelled the cappochino and figured, the bigger the better and if gov't money wasn't going to the squeegie kids (ed. why do their dogs have cellphones?) it should be spent on Rob Lowe's trailer.

My Whopper with Cheese is here so thats it for tonight. The list of Telefilm approved/financed scripts came out today so I shurely will be commenting on that tomorrow. Oh, bonus! Fries!

Random Friday Night Stuff!

2007-12-14T23:33:00.000-03:00

It's Friday night in Halifax and I guess all the film and tv people are out partying, "'tis the season" as they say. I haven't seen my friend/editor, Maurice since he headed off to the NSFDC aka Film Nova Scotia party last night. I'm sure he's okay. I try not to worry but the last time he was gone for 24 hours like this, he was missing for two days. Then he showed up at my door saying he had been working on a reality show for the CBC called, "Eat, Drink, Puke: McLean's Magazine Finally Decides Canada's Best University. As we live between Dalhousie and St. Mary's I don't take sides. Actually, on a Friday night, I usually see both sides outside my window.

This season is a mixed blessing for me; I love the animated Christmas specials on TV, the coloured lights of the neighbouring houses and apartments, but I hate the bitter memories of Christmas' gone by. I don't want to "down you" but finding coal in our stockings was actually a blessing in Cape Breton, in the day. Once in a while we found an orange on the tracks between the colliries, and we didn't question where they came from. Um, memories of juicy railway oranges, now that's Christmas to me.

Anyhoo, back to Tv, in the now. The big news is that Apple has decided there is enough interest to offer Canadian TV shows for downloading. I haven't checked it out yet, but I have my fingers crossed that both seasons of "Blackfly" are available. Just try and keep me away from the computer for that. Apparently, the downloads are $1.99 each and if they don't charge 10% more for Blackfly, they don't realize the historical cash cow they have. I can't imagine what the Americans will think when they are offered the series.

In other news, Toronto's Ellen Page is featured in Entertainment Weekly and she's been nominated for the CANADIAN film "Juno" for a Golden Globe. (Or is she nominated for a Juno for Golden Globe?) Talented and so gosh darn cute.

Now someone told me (via anonymous e-mail) that Halifax Film's Christmas party includes a toy drive for underprivledged kids. Apparently you pay the wholesale price of one of the Lunar Jim toys and it's donated to some indigent child. Um, excuse me, but as a shareholder, I don't see a lot of "Oliver's" roaming the streets looking for a "Ted" or "Rover" toy. All I see are hooligan's who spraypaint the sides of buildings with grammatically incorrect anatomical descriptions. Dare I say I would like to provide them with a "Ripple" in a secure place. So let's not let the wholesale price of Chinese produced "action figures" be compared to what they sell for in Zellers. Let's keep that little secret to ourselves.

This arguement may be all for not, anyway as I don't put a lot of credibility in this report anyway. For one thing it assumes that Halifax Film will be giving away/donating/contributing to a cause. Sorry kids, business is business. Plus the other part of this supposed report that Charles (the Green Arrow Bishop) dressed up as Santa. Now, that, I'd leave the apartment to see..

Halifax Film/TV Celebrates 100! But not too loud, Okay...

2007-12-07T23:38:00.000-03:00

Sorry about signing off early last night but I was feeling a little "under the weather". (ed. If by "weather" you mean "cosmopolitans" and by "under" you mean "had a dozen" than I agree.)

My editor tonight is Maurice (ed. Howdy), who has been here for more than 24 hours, which I'm sure is past the best before date, hint, hint. He came over last night after the Telefilm party, and the Shoe Shop after that. I'll pass the keyboard over to him to talk about the party.

(ed. Thanks. Not much to tell, I arrived about an hour after it started, fashionably late of course. I made my way to the bar and after watching the bartender painstakingly pour a tonic water out of a can into a glass for 13 minutes, I scored a lukewarm Keiths. The usual "in" crowd was there and I was able to draw upon my powers of invisibility, and not have any of them approach me and initiate conversation. I just hate the chit-chat that is common at these events.

I positioned myself in the boardroom which gave me access to snacks, a view of the main room and most importantly a back-up escape route should I be cornered by any "producer, writer, director, actor in training" that assumed I might be somebody important.

The highlight of the evening was when Gord Whittiker made a speech about the accomplishments of Telefilm Halifax i.e. Atlantic Provinces over the last year. And actually it sounded impresive; Chaz Thorne wrote two movies and directed one of them with that guy from Lethal weapon, no, not him, the other guy: Michael Melski was wrapping up a film he wrote and directed and Jay Dahl was "going to camera" in the new year. Maybe not "Men With Brooms" but still impressive. Especially since Telefilm "Papa" in Toronto, couldn't see the East Coast with a set of binoculars.

It was a bit unsettling when Gordon mentioned "Shake Hands With the Devil" as a high point for the industry in the province. Usually any mention of DHX/Halifax film project draw an enthusiastic response but last night it was half-hearted. It picked up a bit when it was revealed that someone from the company was in the room, but it died when that person was revealed to be Dana (the Link) Laundry, a number cruncher. Applause died completely when it was found that even he had either not bothered to show up or had left.

After that, I mingled a bit, without making eye contact, stole a phone and then left. The remainder of the evening is a blur.)

And, although I wasn't there, I must say the snacks (I can't spell h'ordeaves) were't that great. Maurice brought back some pita bread and humus and some sort of substance in a tartlet. Even with allowing for the fact they were in Maurice's pocket for ten hours, they were not that good. Shrimp anyone? Or scallops, or salmon on a cracker? This is Eastern Canada after all.

Anyhoo, in other N.S. film news, "A Bug and a Bag of Weed" is debuting in theatres this week. (ed. this title is not going to work in Goerge Bush's America). This is a locally written, shot, acted, etc., etc. movie. Apparently, with telefilm money, a bunch of guys made a movie for $500,000. Sounds like a lot of money but, no offence, my company (ed. note: the writer owns 1000 shares of DHX/Halifax Film) spends that on Christmas bonus's. (ed. Note: Just Above the Line. Not employees or shareholders.)

I don't know of anyone who's gone to see the movie or if it's any good but DHX bought animation giant Studio B this week.

That brings me to my personal life, sorry to bore you all again but...there's three of us living in this one bedroom apartment (five if you count my dog Biscuitface and the thing growing in my sister's womb), and there's very little income coming in.

So, I have decided to return to the career i left behind, oh so many years ago; writing. I figure that instead of trying to write for shows that are already on the air, I would CREATE (yes, in capitals, WGA, my BROTHERS in arms!) a show and pitch it to a producer who has better access than me to the broadcasters. Maybe Halifax Film, my brethren.

Halifax Film Stuff - Thursday, December 6th, 2007. A Day that Will Live In...well, untill 12:00

2007-12-06T23:23:00.000-03:00

Okay, so maybe I shouldn't be blogging tonight because of one too many cosmopolitans (ed. one = six) but its been over a week and people are calammering for news of whats happening in tv and film in Nova Scotia this last week. (ed. perhaps "clammering" is what you meant but not what is real). Anyhoo, my friend Maurice will be editing for you tonight (ed. Hi.)

Maurice is lucky in that, unlike me, he can leave the apartment and interact with the "real" world. Well, not really, he was at the Telefilm Christmas party tonight.

This blog is supposed to be about the "bix", I mean "bix", shit, why do they pot the x so close to the x on the keyboard. I mean Z. But people (I assume they're not seni-cognigent robots from the future) want to know what's happening here. A brief, then back to the news. My sister is even more pregnant than last week, my roommate, Carly is still a drug addicted Ho, and my coc-a poo Bisuitface, has not been walked in three days and ironically is constipated.

I live in a one bedroom apartment.

On the good side DHX aka Halifax Film has bought Studio B. Just like that, they've scooped up the production company that made George of the Jungle, Ricky Spocket, ...and othe stuff. We are #1! (ed. Note: the authour owns 1,000 shares of DHX.) Right, so what are those shares trading at tonight? Let me check.....$1.70.

Wow. That's what it was when I inherited them.

Since I lost my job selling ointments to standup comedians, life has been a bit of a struggle.

I'm feeling a bit flemmy right now, but I'll finish this blog tomorrow night.

As Stephen Bishop would sing "On and On" in Halifax

2007-11-28T20:59:00.000-03:00

Not much going on, well from my apartment anyway. Just to keep in the blogging habit and with the absence of intelligence (ed. Not that we don't have intelligence, well, that's not what the author meant anyway, he ment outside info) I've just been googling to find info on what's happening.

I found a link from a Martha Stewart fan who hates all things negative about Martha Stewart (ed. taking it a bit personal for a mythological figure, isn't she?) including a tv movie of the week that was shot in Halifax a few years ago. Here's the link if you want to read the whole bloody thing to make sure I didn't take the time (ed. as if!) to make this crap up.

http://www.savemartha.com/themovie.html

I'll cherry pick her too-expansive blog for some quotes "Finally, underlying the bad script and the poor performances is a cheap production quality, which firmly relegates this film to lower-rung status among made-for-TV bio-dramas. The diminutive Halifax (ed. wtf? We are 1:1 full scale even if we do use metric (ed. pay lip service to it anyway))setting has nothing on the glamour and style of Westport or the orderly grit of New Jersey. (ed. Are we supposed to know Westport? I guess if we're Martha fans. And I've been to Jersey. Grit, yes. Orderly? Well, the waste dumps are catagorized according to toxicity, so yeah, have to give them that much.)

In a strange twist of irony, (Candace) Bergen was in Halifax at the same time the shoot for Martha Inc. was going on, starring in a much more prestigious project.

She was cast in a TV film called Footsteps, a suspense drama directed by John Badham, who directed such screen favorites as Saturday Night Fever, Stakeout, Incognito and Point of No Return. (ed. anybody ever hear of this? anybody...anybody...Bueller?)

Reports that Candice and Cybill got together for a succulent lobster dinner only to end up in a fist fight knee deep in clam shells are unconfirmed!" (ed. Now that I would pay to see!)

More googling discovered that Ellen Page (X-Men, Hard Candy, Juno) was in an episode of Trailer Park Boys playing "Treena Lahey".

And to be current - Ron Foley MacDonald "The film version of the best-selling book The Memory Keeper’s Daughter, will be shot in Halifax as a television movie starting November 18th. (ed. snore)

To be directed by Mick Jackson - who helmed the widely seen MOW of the hit inspirational memoir Tuesdays With Morrie - The Memory Keeper’s Daughter will star Dermot Mulroney (Gracie) and Emily Watson, who rose to fame in the art film "Breaking The Waves".

But closer to home, my sister Stella has moved back in. She broke up with her Brazillian boyfriend Carl.

Now, I'm not asking for pity here but....I'm sharing a one bedroom apartment with a crack hore roommate, my sister and her pre-natal b*tard child (ed. though no fault of his/her own, and my cock-a-poo, Biscuitface.

And since I can't leave the apartment, something's got to give!

But for no particular reason are Jimmy Stewart, Dean Martin and Orsen Welles just goofin' around on Dean's TV show. Looks like they're having fun cause they are!

Halifax (and her Areas) Film/Tv Stuff

2007-11-20T16:44:00.000-03:00

Not too much happening, apparently, in the tv/film biz in Halifax. Slowing down for Christmas, I suppose. If I could leave the apartment I'd take in some of the parties that'll surely be going on. Even when I lived in California and Vancouver, I was always able to come home to Halifax at this time of year and there'd be parties, pretty well every night leading up to Christmas; NSFDC, Telefilm, Collideascope (ed. hopefully they've cleaned the washroom since that last time. Or maybe they just boarded it up.), plus many private ones.

But the best was always the Salter Street parties. It was invitation only but I had a friend in the government who I would always tag along with. (ed. presumably in the money supply side.) It was always interesting to watch the room(s) seperated into cliques; the managers, the office worker bees, the honoured guests (ed. funding people?), the young, bright-eyed filmmakers who were excited to have just gotten themselves a job on a production (ed. visions of sugar plums dancing in their heads) and the other prodction workers who had been there a while. (ed. with that "soul sucked out of them" look.)

The high point was when the producers and the executive producers, were wheeled down from the executives offices just drunk enough on imported scotch and the blood of a hundred virgins, to be able to mingle amongst the riff-raff without shuddering.

Sometimes they even made eye contact.

This was before Charles "the Green Arrow" Bishop was part of the "team". At one party, I remember he and I in the kitchen joking about what a farce the film industry was with its stupid tier system and status battles. Now that I think about it, the year after that he was having me kicked to the curb by a bouncer when I tried to crash the Salter party. That was the last time I saw him.

Legend has it that after the sale of Salter Street to Alliance Atlantis, he could be heard in the Barrington Street office, scurrying through the heating ducts, playing Hot Cross Buns on his recorder, and bemoaning the fact that he gave up a lucrative film production company (ed. Who can forget The Food Show, and that Loto 649 commercial with the squirrel)

The next time I heard about him, he had been hired , then fired from Alliance Atlantis, The final indignation; he had to sit in the cheap seats at the Academy Awards while Michael Donovan shared the stage (ed. 1/4, 3/4's who is who, you decide.) with Michael Moore. (ed. Rumours persist to this day that it was Charles who was boo'ing the loudest.)

I wonder whatever happened to him? Hmmm.... I wonder...wonder....won...

Oh right.

I have to log off soon as my issue of Playback came today and I'll be snuggling up in my beanbag chair to see what THE publication of CANADIAN TV has to say about the industry this week. The cover has House from Global and some American chick from a "CTV" show.

Who says we can't produce popular programming in this country, eh?!

There's a special supplement on The Comedy Channel's 10'th Anniversary. I really should watch more of this channel representing Canadian comedy classics; from 6 year old 22 Minutes (ed. doesn't "news" start with "new"? to the latest Jon Stewart, this channell has it all!

Otherwise in good old NS, the only production related news is the "attempted" sale of a soundstage in Shelburne has been stalled again. A few years ago, the government of the province was so keen on film and tv production being the saviour of our economy (ed. anybody remember Clairtone? Heavy Water? Call Centres? sigh, oh well its only money and Pfft , only government money at that!) they decided that turning a big empty building in the middle of nowhere would draw hollywood stars like...spiders to butter? I dunno, make up your own allegory here. (ed. I think you mean metaphor.)

Whatever. Surprisingly the movers and shakers of lala land may be enticed to come to Halifax (ed. given the money) but a three hour trip to the boonies (ed. 2 and 1/2 by Hummer with a Mountie escort) was not on the plate.

So other than Virginia's Run a movie about a horse, starring ahorse ans ome other people, the government had spent another $2,75M on a big empty nothing.

So the property was turned over to a local development agency to sell. And an item in the Daily News suggests that this is not as easy as it sounds.

Steve Gilmour wanted to buy the place but says the development agency rep Frank Anderson gave him only "constant delaying tactic and mistruths". Frank Anderson said that the opposite was true. (ed. nice comeback, Potsie.)

Frankly, I never heard of either of these guys but if anybody needs a sound stage for a movie, I thing the rent is real cheap. Just don't expect the Cappocinno to be "not Tim's".

Picnicface. Funny.

2007-11-14T11:36:00.000-03:00

Stumbled over a bunch of videos made by the local comedy troupe "Picnicface". Check out their website here for their videos http://www.picnicface.com/ Gonna try and embed one here -

These guys are good. They're funny and fresh and they're not imitating other people's comedy. Apparently they perform at Ginger's Tavern in Halifax, andI wish I could leave the apartment to see them live.

If you can, check them out live and let me know what they're like. Also check their videos, they mad me laugh out loud.

And its just so refreshing to know there's other stuff going on in tv and write about it.

Stupid CTF! If it ain't Broke, Let's Break It!!.

2007-11-13T22:30:00.000-03:00

Got a meassage from the CTF letting me know about all the other people that got money, besides us. (ed. "us" is DHX Halifax Film in which the writer owns 1000 shares).

We're noticeably absent from the lottery winners. In fact the only recipients from Nova Scotia are $60,000 for a documentary on sable island ponies (ed. yawn. Not unless there's a bunch of them on an island and only one survives would that be interesting.), another documentary called "Norm", (ed. cool title, I'm already intreagued!) from a company called Moodat Productions for the CBC by Teresa MacInnis, and Kent Nason (ed. $76,000, not even the Starbucks tab of Halifax Film, the exec.'s not the proles.), and a one hour Trailer Park Boys Special, $507,000, (ed. wtf, are they on a Carribbean cruise?)

Not that the east coast isn't represented; there's a show called East Coast Bound and the Rankin Family Reunion (ed. which at over 1/4 million dollars means the Rankin must be playing on that TPB cruise. A lot of fun-filled hi-jinks and splashing around the pool, the one with the float up bar.)

But they are out of Toronto.

But my point is...nothing for DHX Halifax Film?! What is going on? CTF money is from the government and the cable companies, (ed. via the final consumer, don't panic Mr. Rogers. It's not your money. Yet.) There's an entitlement issue here people! How many pony/rankin documentaries must we endure before we have something commercial to watch!

So the years half over and we will have to limp along with our $25M IPO, our $2M in Nova Scotia Business Inc. payroll rebate, our $17M of more stock issued, $2M Film Nova Scotia (ed. which sounds like an order, (formerly the NSFDC)), $50,000 in ACOA money and the tax credits which can make up 1/2 of the cost of labour. For the love of God! Why do we pay taxes?! Let's get off the stick and step up to the trough people!

Meanwhile, I haven't seen my roommate Carly, in days. I know she's not hiding in the apartment like last time, because my dog Biscuitface, has been whining like a Starbucks latte machine. And she was supposed to pay the rent for November.(ed. Carly, not Biscuitface.) Hopefully I won't get a visit from the super, Gregor, before she comes back. He frightens me and last time we were late with the rent he punched me in the throat.

Halifax Tv and Films Stuff.

2007-11-12T00:46:00.000-03:00

Not much in the way of industry news. Michael Melski's still shooting a film in New Brunswick, something about a Ma..ju..ana, ah crap, I can't spell, "grass" crop. That, plus a trailer park boys film released on DVD should set the cultural tone for east coast.

Other than that, film and tv in nova scotia continues to shine on the shy Halifax Film DHX takeover of Canada. (ed. But I thought Alliance Atlantis was our county's international showboat...oh, right.)

Regular bloggees know that I'm a Halifax Film/DHX shareholder so lets just get that out of the way now. I own 1000 shares! Not a lot compared to the millions that Michael Donovan, Charlie (The Green Arrow) Bishop, and Dana.. whatever, grant themselves wheneven the mood strikes them, but I have a say. Albeit on an anonymous website, but I can read it and know that somebody has an opinion!

My roommate Carly is finally asleep after literally climbing the walls in the apartment. For some reason she was upset that a ship from Lebanon was delayed several days from docking in Halifax because of storms.

Really, nobody should be that upset about the weather! It just doesn't pay.

Anyway, I was sleeping , fitfully for me anyway, when I heard this knocking on the patio doors. I woke up, still not sure I was dreaming or not, and there was the albino monkey that my sister's boyfriend had sent up from Brazil.

I had released it into the wild (ed. university freshmann life) because I felt it should be free like all of God's creatures. But mostly because it was pissing me off, slurpling my cospmopolitans every time I put them down.

Anyway, this monkey knocked until I was awake and when I looked at it, it gave a beckoning wave to me. But I remebered all those movies about vampires, how the only way they could enter your house was if they were invited in. And me, not prejudiced or anything, had no desire to join the ranks of the albino monkey brigade. Plus he had taken his pants off.

Luckily, after I turned over for sleep/not hallucination, the monkey was gone.

Speaking of albino monkys, last week DHX/Halifax Film announced that they were acquiring (ed. or not let's not show our cards yet) Tribal Media which has something to do with on-line media games for children. (ed.virtual bricks and mortar for the upcoming trainables!)

It has nothing to do with on-line gambling i.e. gaming for young'ins.
Tribal Inc has relationships with CBC, Cookie Jar, etc, but then so did my Mother.

On another topic, "we" are working on another internet "initiative", Wondermedia Inc.

Luckily of the $79,900 it cost to hire a "Director of Digital Media" we had help from ACOA, the Atlantic Canada Opportunities Agency which gave us a modest grant to hire poor unemployed Nova Scotian, of $50,000. Hopefully they won't notice that the person we hired is not from here.

Luckily the agency that does nothing but give away money didn't waste their funds on farms or inventions or new ways of creating business opportunities. We (ed. us and HFX Decode). Joe Lunchbuckets should just get a job and leave the creativity to us.

As a postscript, I don't want to hear anybody whining about the $50,000 of taxpayers money from ACOA. It's money well spent and most importantly, it doesn't come out of our, $22M governmant tax credit receivable, our $2 M NSBI payroll rebate etc.

Let Free Enterprise rein! (ed. chuckle!)

Hey DHX Halifax Film! No Cheese For Me?

2007-11-07T22:40:00.000-03:00

I'm a bit put out tonight as I heard that there was an Annual General Meeting of shareholders of DHX yesterday, and I wasn't invited! As you know I own 1000 shares which may only be .00001% of the outstanding shares but who knows, maybe someday I'll be the swing vote over some contentious issue between Oscar(c) Winner Michael Donovan and his right hand man Charles (the Green Arrow )Bishop!

Though I couldn't have attended because I can't leave the apartment, it would have been nice to have been invited. It's the thought that counts, after all. And sometimes the proxy.

I learned this from the e-news allnovascotia.com. They also said that DHX is neither confirming or denying that they are acquiring (they paid $100,000 for the right to possibly someday, maybe purchase) this company in Quebac that makes interactive games for kids. That's the take of about 50 welfare mothers, depending on the age, number and heft of their children.

Sorry, I guess I'm a little ticked, because when I initially heard they were looking to acquire a company, I thought there was a remote possibility they were thinking of my all but defunct corporation I had a few years ago. On retrospecte, it's probably not much of a catch considering the brightest jewel in its crown was a documentary entitled "Joe Clark: A Dynasty in the Making."

Have I mentioned I've been in this business a long time and some of my choices have not been the best?

As for me, my roommate, Carly is back to "normal" so my dog Biscuitface is getting his regular walks and I'm getting my regular Whopper with cheese.

Probably not as good a cheese as they had at the Annual General Meeting of DHX last night.

Hi Honey, I'm Hom-o!

2007-11-06T21:16:00.000-03:00

This was the payoff to a joke I wrote years ago about a guy who comes home from work one day and in a spontaneous gesture decides to out himself to his wife. Maybe the build-up wasn't worth the pay-off but really, the Air Farce turned it down?

And before you jump on me for using the term "Homo", we're reclaiming ownership of the word! (ed. who? the heteros?).

And you will note that I spelled it with a dash. Why you ask? Well, I've noticed that a lot of people who find my blog have been googling "kicked in the balls". Now I'm sure they're not looking for the story I commented on a few months ago. I'm not sure what they are looking for, exactly. Well, I guess I know what, I just don't know why. Most of these searches come from Germany. So I thought I would save a whole bunch of guys from looking through my blog for pictures that aren't here.

Anyhoo, as was repeated in weeks past, DHX Halifax Film Factory has been price-ranged out of their home away from home, the Electropolis Films studio.

Electropolis was a former power substation on the Halifax waterfront that was convereted into a soundstage with millions of Federal and Nova Scotiian tax payer dollars. Salter Street Film used the space quite a bit for Lexx and other intelectually stimulating properties, than a totally new animal Halifax Film Ltd. bought the company that operated the sound stage and rented it out to Halifax Film Ltd. (ed. I'm a little dizzy) This was all done on behalf of the owners Nova Scotia Power Inc who agreed to a less than fair market value rent for ten years. Now ten years later, those power hungry (ed. and full) owners want to charge Halifax Film Company full market rent? (ed. excuse me, do they not know what province they're in? Unless there's government subsidies available, we're out!)

And so we are. Even the NDP stepping up to bat, couldn't convince the gov't to chip in. (ed. chuckle)

allnovascotia.com and Playback announced that Halifax Film is moving production facilities from Electropolis to a building beside CBC radio.

We (ed. note, the writer owns 1000 shares of DHX/Halifax Film), are not disloyal. We are cost concious. And when you think about it, do we really need 50 ft high ceilings for drugged out animators to manipulate their tiny figurines? I think not. So with their (ed. "our!") employees in mind we are moving from the rat infested waterfront to...beside the CBC which I'm sure will be vastly different. As VP David Regan notes, the employees will now actually have windows to look out off. But do we want them looking out windows fantasizing about the day they can pitch their own superhero/alien/laugh fest cartoon that's going to compete with our staid and true puppet/animation thingys? Let's not start spoiling them now. Next they'll be wanting 12 hour days, time off for funerals, and washrooms!

At least they're not going to be within a smell of DHX/Halifax Film Factory World Headquarters on Spring Garden Road, sitting above a ...yes...Starbucks!

So, I don't want to be trading inside, whatever that means, but its all good news! So let's get that share price up from today's $1.70!

Meanwhile, its been a very hectic week here. Last week Carly, my roommate quietly went to her room for a few days to sleep, after a nasty reaction to some antibiotics (ed. see previous blog).

On the 31st she emerged from her bedroom wearing a filthy robe, someone elses's pajama's ,with her hair all bunched up from sweat. I, oblivious in retrospect, asked her what her Halloween costume was. She told me she was a cold turkey, but I really didn't want to look at her giblets.

The albino monkey that arrived last week (ed. Ya know when you type/read this stuff it sounds weird) for my sister's Brazillian boyfriend, easily escaped it's cage and spent the week hanging out with Carly, watching Fox news and biffing food around the place. (ed. Apparently there was a lot of vomit and poo flung about, but we can't totally blame that on the monkey.)

By Friday I had enough. I opened the patio doors and threw a Bud Light over the railing (ed. the monkey's favourite and no loss to us, really, we have water.)

The monkey scrambled over the patio railing and I quickly closed the doors. I'm not a cruel man. I know the monkey will be fine, mostly because we are near St. Mary's and Dalhousie University and there are many who would assume that's he's merely a freshman and throw food at him. As long as he doesn't sign for a student loan, his future is secure.

Halifax Film Ltd, Can I Biggie Size That for You?

2007-10-27T21:57:00.000-03:00

Forget Halifax Film Ltd being # 4 in this country. You Non-share-holding suckers! We movin' on up!

Halifax Film Ltd aka Halifax Film which now owns and controls Decode and was formerly Salter Street Films (ed. sigh, which started as producer of Codco, which Michael and Paul Donovan's "relative" who was in charge of CBC Maritimes, greenlit, okay?) has raised another $17.4 M by selling 9.7 M units of DHX, the "parent company."

To clarify, that's $17,400,000 by "selling" i.e. printing ... a bunch of shares to a consotium (ed. love that word, especially if I'm one of the...um's!)

Now, to back track, our company raised $25M in an IPO, (ed. full disclosure - the author is a shareholder to the tune of 1000 shares), has been promised $2,000,000 from the province of Nova Scotia (ed. who can certainly afford it) in a labour rebate program to pay for all those New Brunswick Merimechi students, Sheridan animation students and Ontario Playa's; ...everything else, to take up residency in our province in order to colour in Poko's eyes. (ed. the reg's say you have to live here but "wink, wink" who's the wiser, eh. All for the greater good, eh, what gov'ner! There will never be another Cinar on my watch!). Plus we're owed about $22,000,000 in tax credits ie. gov't money, i.e. thanks taxpayers!

The agreement's in concrete (ed. practically:)

"Although no agreements or understandings have been reached and no committments made with any respect to any transaction, there have been significant discussions in certain cases."

I think we're "a couple" who no one has seen kiss!

On the other hand, Methinks he doth potest too much. But really, I have no idea what "he's" saying. It's kinda like, "well, I don't not like her, but we're not dating and I don't "like" like her, but I'm not going to ignore her 'cause she's looking at me, amd I'm not, not looking at her, you know?"

But thankfully, Michael Donovan, "In God we trust, but that's just for the soul thingy, someone back my shares, like Mike!" is ready to....dah, dah, dah acquire!

But, what or who is he "us" going to acquire? Stay tuned ! If they want, they can acquire my old production company, though I haven't paid my Joint Stock fees for a while it's still, could be, a viable thingy. After all it did produce the CBC documentary "Alexander Graham Bell: The Man, The Mind, On Ice!", the CTV special "My Proud Canada: Canadians Who Live in the U.S." and the Global mini-series "Spend This Money and Call me Can-Con!" which was shown on three consecutive nights starting at 3:00 A.M, I was told cause the audience they were after was insomniacs and the hunted. And though I haven't produced in years; I think there's value in those there archives.

So anyway, they've printed 9.7M units of DHX for the $17.46 M. To put it more plainly, 9,700,000 units for $17,460,000. As a shareholder, I'm all for growth but if 9.7M shares are going out the window, does that make my 1000 shares seem, smaller , by comparioson? (ed. no, you're fine. signed John Holmes)

I'm not a money guy but I'm thinking I have a thousand melons and Michael et all have ...millions of melons, then they trade more melons that they find under the melon tree, does that mean my melons are no longer attractive? I mean we all want to have the most attractive melons in the market right? And if there are melons, everywhere, like on a Rio beach, they will lose their allure at some point.

Let me just check the stock price. Okay, traded st $1.70 today so that's cool. I guess if someone is going to corner the melon market, I might as well be in the wagon.

But for me there are bigger parrots to fry. As regular readers know, I have a new roomamte who I brought in to help pay the rent. Her name is Carly and I suspect the business she's in is not import/export because that seems to be more exotic than trading little baggies of "something" through the slot of a metal bullet proof door that she had installed.

But anyway, she had been missing for two days, and I was concerned. I don't recall her leaving the apartment, but then when I'm having a treatment, I kind of zone out anyway. My main concern was that the food inventory was kind of low and my cock a-poo, Biscuitface hadn't been walked in days. If I was able to leave the apartment things wouldn't have seemed so dire. But then two things happened simutaineously, that broke the relative boredom and/or scared the crap out of me.

Having been alone for the last few days, I was spooked by sounds coming from our storage closet. I dragged Biscuitface to the closet, but then he ran in fear when a moan emenated from it. I started to open the door but then jumped when someone knocked at the front door. (ed. Actually there's only one door to the apartment.)

It was a Canada Post drone delivering a package for Carl, my sister's Brazilian boyfriend. I signed for it (using Henry Kissenger's name as a joke, I guess only for my benefit), and the man brought this huge box into the apartment that had like a million Brazillian postage stamps on it. And the freakin' box was moving. So the Canada Post guy scurried out and I figured I had to see what was in the box. I took my boxcutter (ed. post-911, non-threatening, I hope) and opened it up. what was inside shocked even me (ed. and in your days in hollywood, you saw Joan Collins with only half her make-up on.)

But before I could re-act, there was a movement from the closet and suddenly there appeared Carly. Now I must tell you, I did not recognize her at first glance. Or indeed, the second, third glance or the shocked stare on my face subsequent.

Whatever drug Carly was performing under, it caused her to strip down to her panties, put pillowcases on her feet, hands and head and spin around the room moaning. It looked like a marshmallow starfish with breasts.

Then her contortions around the room, startled the occupant of the crate that had just been delivered, and it broke free.

So last evening, around CBC news time, I had to deal with a crack ho who looked like a five pronged Q-tip, who was scaring the bejesus out of a pure white monkey wearing pants.

I think that's all I can report for tonight.

Oh, yea, the gram...geminis were awarded last night and apparently went well.

Halifax Film Company (you go girl!) (and a little about me)

2007-10-20T22:39:00.000-03:00

I try and keep this blog about the tv industry in Nova Scotia but other than the Cool Machine that is the Halifax Film Company, not nuch is going on. Is anybody else even trying? Their are millions of dollars in gov't subsidies out there and if you aren't going to grab them then I guess its up to us! (ed. He's a shareholder.)

So a little about changes happening here. My "friend" Carly from down the hall has moved in. This is not "more than friends" in nature, I just need some help. Since my sister moved out with her boyfriend, making ends meet has been a bit dicey. I was able to get along with the small allotment from the Catholic Church that comes in (not really allowed to discuss it, legally), and from what I made selling specialized ointments and medical devices specific to stand-up comedians, which I used to be one...of.

But yesterday I was fired. It seems like the new girl, Tina, who I trained and was supposed to be working under me (ed. careful) has been promoted to my position and I've been made "redundant". Don't know how that works but then I'm not a lawyer.

And as I can't leave the apartment, my employment prospects are not good. Hence the roommate.

So far things have been okay. For most of the day Carly, stays in her room and is pretty quiet, except for the occasional groans, and dashes to the washroom and the fridge to get orange juice.

Oddly enough, the first thing she did when she moved in here was to cut this big slot in the apartment door. She says she does a lot of her business (ed. which apparently is top secret gov't stuff) by mail. But I didn't know Canada Post delivered up to and well after midnight. And I didn't know they paid cash for Carly's little baggies of advertising brochures. But since she doesn't interupt my big screen tv viewing (ed. The Sound of Music, again?) so I'm cool.

I read an article in the paper the week before, by Ron Crocker, ex. Director of Atlantic (ed. or Maritime) CBC. he said the recent increase in the NS film tax credit really doesn't do much to create, or drive the local film and tv industry. He says the local tax credit, now at 50%, draws foreign producers who come here looking for cheap labour, to shoot their movies of the week.

He thinks we should develop our own industry. One that is "Canadian". Give tax credits to "Canadian" producer, writer, director, actor driven projects rather than subsidize the series of Tom Selleck movies of the week. Well, Mr. "Crock"er, that's very easy to say but, where do you expect Mr. selleck to park his luxury trailer? Vegas? (ed. ouch.)

He and his entourage pay a pretty penny using our bagagge handles importing his special water and food. They also employ, for weeks on end, grips, camera assistants, drvers, garbage piker uppers, actors (ed. well, extras), non-Tom Selleck food cookers; all at 50% of their real cost. The Nova Scotia Taxpayers, overjoyed to see the "made in Nova Scotia" font at the end of the credits, might disagree.

But if we took the leap and said, yes, we would help put Canadian writer, produced, acted, crewed films into production like the Australians (Gallipoli, mad Max, The Games etc) and the Brits (well, okay, a lot), what are you going to do with them? Show the TV shows on TV? hah. They can't compete, as far as we know, with America's excellent commercial driven productions. (ed. except for Corner Gas, Little Mosque)

But what about Canadian movies? Sure we make really good movies but unless an American distributor tells us so, how are we supposed to even know it exists.

So, we have a leg up, (ed. especially in Lifetime movies staring Rob) on productions in other provinces. Sure, we're number 4 in Canada (ed. Still ahead of Newfoundland and New Brunswick), but the more taxpayer money we spend to subsidize temporary jobs the more we'll be ahead of Minnisota. And North carolina. And other places. C'mon people, let's step up to the plate.

For Tom.

But back to business. While I have supper, (the good thing about Carly is that she will go get Whopper's for me at any time of the day or night. I feel guilty splurging but, I just can't help myself. Besides, Carly usually offers to pay and it seems like she doesn't mind. She's always carrying a big roll of cash.

But back to the business.

As I said the only tv business going on in Nova Scotia is the imaginatively named Halifax Film Company. Now, many of you will note and I fully disclose that I am a shareholder in that company. Personally myself, I own 1000 shares. And I know compared to Michael Donovan (ed. 6,952,027 shares) and Charles (The Green Arrow) Bishop (ed. 2,451,078 shares), I am not a major "playa" but who could not feel a kinship with these two powerhouses, when we have all sacrificed ..., well, I sacrificed my beliefs but I'm sure my Gumbas gave up something.

Anyway, halifax Film has disclosed these salaries:

Dana Landry: $237,000 plus a $20,000 bonus (well deserved, I say!) plus $1,990 in "other compensation (ed. could range from parking, cappochinos).

Steven Dehude (?), $250,000. Don't know who he is or what he does but I'm sure I would have voted for him if I had the chance.

As far as being on the board goes, I sure showing up once a month (ed. seems excessive) goes, Sir Graham Day receives $15,000 a year and $500 per meeting. I'm not saying that two of his days equals my rent plus groceries is not fair but sometimes my mind wanders. Oh crap, that reminds me, I'm out of meds. And now that I'm unemployed, I'm not covered.

Quietly into the Night.

2007-10-17T22:42:00.001-03:00

Okay, like when I opened the door the other night (ed. who types out "like"), there was nobody there. And cause this is supposed to be a security building, it was either someone who lives on the floor (ed. first guess would be crack-whoeey, who lives down the hall, or maybe the fetal alcohal teen who lives at the other end who enjoys nothing better than banging his head, helmet on of course, against any hard surface he finds) or someone more sinister. Now I know my meds have been changed slightly but the paranoia level, hasn't been artificially inflated.

But I have actually little to report anyway.

The Nova Scotia Film Development Corporation is now calling itself FilmNS, which I think was the original name back when Jesus was a cowboy.

Over at another blog http://heywriterboy.blogspot.com/ I was supremely happy to read that Corner Gas's ratings were as good as Heroes! It just pisses me off that all the talent in this country is not appreciated. At least not here.

And to top it off CTV's probably pissed, now they have to continue on down this "Canadian Content" road now that their show is successful. When the show first started CTV used it to burn up the money they had to commit for the purchase and to prove that Canadian tv would just appear whither and die like it usually does. But they really should have followed Global's lead when they produced the rancid "Blackfly" then tried to bury any other good show like "the Jane Show" in confusing scheduling etc..

Corner Gas is a hit and deservedly so because it is funny.

Okay.

Tomorrow night I'll comment on Ron Crocker's article in the Chronicle Herald about the Nova Scotia Film tax credit.

And again, not to be paranoid but my computer keeps flashing these "Halifax Film Company is your friend" screens at me every 45 seconds or so. Probably just a glitch.

Just wonder what that think on top of the building across the dtreet is that keeps glinting sunlight.

The stock is at $1.85

Carly Returns and What's up Decode!

2007-10-15T20:08:00.000-03:00

Well, Carly the co-dependant, drug user (ed. ex-drug user she said) who lives down the hall has been coming by and taking my dog Bicuitface out for his walks. Its been great as he doesn't have to squat over the edge of the balcony (ed. trying to get between two rungs isn't as easy as it sounds when your facing away from them on all fours.)

I like Carly most times. She's engaging and intelligent and she always stays for a Cup o' Soup with me after she walks my dog. But sometimes its like I'm talking to a grinning Marmaduke who is just happy that I'm talking to him but has no idea what I'm saying.

The last time she was like that she wanted to know if I wanted to try some of her crack. Now, let's assume, (ed. Hope!) she's talking about the drug and I told her I had to pass. In the 70's and 80's I did a lot of...well, everything. (ed. Didn't you do Wham! in Griffin park?)

I was single, living in L.A. and I was making more money than a crack whore at a cocaine dealers convention. I remember one weekend I had a bunch of rolled up one hundred (ed. U.S.) dollar bills stuck up my nose. The whole weekend! And those presidents were pretty high by Monday when I reported to the set of The Love Boat. And believe me, that crowd didn't care.

Anyway, I'm thinking I may have to take in a roommate. Since my sister moved out with her boyfriend I'm in the middle of a bit of a cash crunch. I've sent an ad into The Coast so hopefully someone not insane/tidy in the bathroom and kitchen/and will pay his share of the expenses while shutting up, will answer.

Oh, and I've noticed that this blog seems to be getting rather a lot of interest at the Decode Website. They're owned by DHX, who I own shares in. I guess they're looking in to see what the shareholders are thinking. Surely they can't be upset at anything that I've published. I've been way positive (ed. You did criticize the directors. And management. And I think you shared some numbers that you shouldn't have.)

Regardless, DHX are reasonable and fair corporate citizens who would only see any criticism as constructive to help...oh wait. Someone's at the door. I'll be right back.

Halifax Film / TV News

2007-10-14T21:49:00.000-03:00

From Atlantic Business magazine -

"Coming to a Television Near You
DHX Media Ltd. can't wait for you to meet the Bannons, a seemingly ordinary family living in an ordinary house in an ordinary neighborhood in an ordinary town. Except that they aren't ordinary at all - they are a very extraordinary family of retired spies. And, thanks to DHX Media Ltd., television viewers will get to follow their comedic antics as they try to adapt to normal life when the live action series airs on the small screen this Fall. DHX Media Ltd., a Halifax-based independent international producer and distributor of television programming and interactive content, has secured the worldwide television and home entertainment distribution rights to Turner Broadcasting's 'My Spy Family', produced by Kindle Entertainment."

A family of spies! Shades of "The Rosenbergs" a comedy made back in the 1950's for the fledgling Dumont Network in the U.S. in the style of "I Love Lucy". It was a madcap comedy about a Jewish family in New York where the Mother Ethel, kept inadvertently giving away atomic bomb secrets to the "Ruskies (ed. actually they were the USSR at that time). It was left to her poor shlep of a husband, Julius and his madcap sidekick, Sticky, to try and right the wrongs and save Ethel the embarassment of being executed for her silly carrying-on.

A bumbling team of FBI agents, Hank and Miranda (ed. who were married to each other. A funny idea at the time, because there would be no such thing as a female FBI agent) kept trying to expose the Rosenbergs and their crazy spying, treasonous ways. It was based on the real Rosenberg spies who were executed for treason in real life.

America loved the show at the time especially the episode where they made the tv image dim when the TV Rosenbergs were electricuted in a hilarious Marx Brother-esque episode. Unfortunately the show had no where to go after the death of the lead characters.

But Halifax Film's new show sounds better and more profitable and that's what it's all about.

But speaking of which September 25th saw the directors of Halifax Film aka DHX give themselves the following "bonus". They were granted options (ed. the right to buy share at a specified price, in this case $1.62) as follows:

Charles Bishop (ed. aka "the Green Arrow") 40,000
Neil Court (ed. shrug) 40,000
Steven Denure (ed. again with the shrug) 75,000
Donald Wright (ed. maybe these three guys are the creative team that stoke the fires) 40,000
Graham Day (ed. sits on about 1500 boards and collects shares and directors fees for just showing up and not complaining that the cavier is not really authentic.)
William Ritchie 40,000 (ed. he's the guy who raised $25,000,000 for Halifax film)
Dana Landry 40,000 (ed. he's the guy who had Willima Ritchie's phone # and thus helped raise $25M)
Joseph Medjusk 40,000 (ed. our ticket to the L.A. Pot o' gold)
and of course Michael Donovan 40,000.

Now this all sounds good because these guys (ed. most of them...some of them...any of them?) deserve to be compensated for guiding the ship that is DHX to profitability (ed. damn the torpedoes! I mean creative)

But do they have to dilute my shares. In really good faith, I inheirited 1000 shares at $1.40 a share. A few weeks ago after the latest financials came out, they were trading at $1.96! I was very happy, though I did not go out and splurge on the extra lean ground beef for my Hamburger Helper instead of medium because I didn't want to cash in; I wanted to hold on for the long term. (ed. Once Poko V: The Revenge hits theatres, we're talking Payday!)

But now these guys go into a small room for the afternoon and decide to option each other like that! The stocks were down to $1.76 on Friday. Even with the drop let's do the math. 40,000 X (1.76 - $1.62) = $5,600. Not a bad payday for an afternoon with a catered lunch.

*sigh* But I guess it means they will work harder to get the share price up, which is good for me. And I'm sure they'll take the $5,600 and just donate it to charity or the local production community. (ed. note: Statistics Canada figures reveal that the average "filmmaker" in Canada earns almost $6,000 a year. But then again, he's in it for the love. Which is delicious!)

that's all for now.

Nothing about Halifax Film Stuff

2007-10-10T21:30:00.000-03:00

So its been a busy weekend, plus. After my sister Stella and her Brazillian boyfriend Carl, moved out, it was really nice. Quiet and non-sticky on the couch for once. I watched ABBA in concert, carl left his big screen tv, and I listened to ABBA Gold while I was working. (ed. If only someone had invented ABBA popcorn snacks!)

But a problem presented itself about an hour after Stella left. My dog, Biscuitface, needed to go out. And since I can't leave the apartment, this was a problem. I thought I had a solution. I took him over to the window, put him over my shoulder like a bag of potatos, and gave him the code word "push" so he would do his business. (ed. on the nazi code machine enigma, this would have come out "minty") So while I had him up there, aiming his ass like a rocketlauncher toward the street (ed. not what Bruce Cockburn envisioned, I imagine), he reacted.

Unfortunately, I thought he had to have a number two, and I pictured that after I yelled "fire in the hole" he would have defecated clear of me and the windowsill. Unfortunately, it was a number 1, which proceded to run down my 1972 USSR(ed. not Russia!) Canada souvenir hockey sweater.

sigh

But we did work out a system where he learned to treat the balcony (ed. should have thought of that before the window), like his personal city street. And no, I don't sweep it over the balcony I actually glove up, and bag it for the garbage.

But thanksgiving was good because Stella and Carl came by and he brought two of those rare Brazillian parrots with him that are endangered. They're beautiful and more intelligent than real parrots; they can answer questions, not just mimic.

And on top of that they were delicious! Even Biscuitface had some and he usually doesn't eat anything unless it comes out of a bag with a picture of a dog on it. (ed. maybe he thinks he's eating another dog!)

But besides us, Stella had invited a few people that lived on our floor. Mrs. McNeil lost her husband a few years back and she has managed to eke out a living by caring for abandoned animals and crack addicts. She's the nicest person and has the patience of a saint. (ed. hopefully not St. Angry, The Demonstrable, who I think is Irish).

Our other guest was from down the hall and her name is Carly. She's around my age, give or take 30 years, it's kinda hard to tell. She's had a hard life; her first husband was a drug addict, her second husband did drugs, her third husband...well, you get the idea. And I think Carly was more than just along for the ride.

Regardless (ed. thank you. irregardless is not a real word!) she is super nice and when all three of her left-over brain cells are in alignment, she's quite intelligent and funny. And she's agreed to take Biscuitface for his daily walks!

She said she'd loved to because she loves animals. She has a cat which I always thought of as a disgusting creature. I mean once in a while you give your dog a bath, grudgingly on his part, but then he's clean. but, a cat? uggh. "No water for me thank you! I keep myself clean". Really, all they do is shove the dirt, tuna, and ass leavings under their fur with their tongue! Then they lick their owners who say, "ahh, she loves me." No, she's just cleaning all the disgusting things off her tongue on to you.

Anyway that's all for now. I have to get back to blogging about the biz!

My DHX (Halifax Film Company) stock is back down to $1.70! I should have sold my 1000 shares when it was at $1.93 last week. Bet this is because of the internet leak of Animal Mechanicals!

East Coast Forgotten and Rotten: Global Television Layoffs and Electropolis Hopes

2007-10-06T23:21:00.000-03:00

K coupla things;

Since my sister left with her Brazilian boyfriend things have gotten...um.. a little desperate. But staying true to the theme of this blog; some television notes:

Global TV has laid of about 200 people across the country including about 37 out of 41 Halifax employees. The local news for Halifax will now be produced and broadcast from Vancouver. I'm trying to wrap my head around this concept: on the positive side a virtual newsroom will be used (ed. yeh! cool! technology!) and the news between the Lotus land city and the city of needy should be similar because....we both have oceans? At least the graphics shouldn't have to change. (ed. 'cept our lobsters are better, 'cause we gots the ones with claws, eh. But they's can photoshop claws on them lame bastards, I 's'pose). On the negative side, how will we know who got mugged, stabbed, tortured, beaten over the head with a table leg, by our own poor disturbed "I only need attention" Young offenders.

The Nova Scotia NDP has stepped into the frey of the Electropolis debacle. as previous readers know, Nova Scotia Power who owes Electropolis, wants to increase rent to Halifax Film Company to what they could get if they rented the film studio out to other people. WTF? Do they know that the principle person using Electropolis has won an Academy Award (tm) ?! That's an Oscar (tm) to you!

Of course Halifax Film needs the gov't to step up to the plate and subsidize the lease. Finally the NDP are realizing that socialism and capitalism can exist side by side, or feed each other or at least share in the magical glow that is Hollywood North...easterly.

We think if this gov't can afford to give money makers like Olands Brewaries, (ed. owned by a Dutch company and enjoying its best year ever)a million or two to get bigger than the film industry in this province aka Michael Donovan, should also enjoy the same consideration. Did Mr. Oland win an Oscar (tm)? I think not.

More Halifax tv/film Stuff

2007-10-03T20:06:00.000-03:00

Well, Stella and Carl are out of the house and I can finally sit around in my underwear blogging with Abba's greatest hits turned up to 5!

A few more tidbits I came across, my friend Maurice aka "ed" will be my editor for this evening.

Halifax Film Company(ed. not again with them!) has secured a $25,000,000 line of credit to help with production financing. That will help cash flow until the government welfare, er, incentives come rolling in.

I watched 22 Minutes Last night and I must say, they seem to have updated themselves nicely and the show was actually funny. Mark Critch seems to be coming into his own since the last time I saw him, a few years ago. He did a pretty decent Jerry Lewis and his Rex Murphy was spot on.

They let some guy (ed. he looked 12) interview a senator in the U.S. who's suing God. The kid was actually pretty good; his timing was impeccable. Hopefully Jon Stewart doesn't steal him away.

Gavin Crawford didn't get a lot to do but I always liked the mischevious look in his eye.

And Cathy Jones was there.

"That News Show" doesn't look like it's going for a second season. The show on TVTropolis (ed. sounds lik a disease) takes weird and wacky tv news stories from around the globe and sucks the entertainment value out of them. It was produced by a Halifax company called Acadia. They do a lot of looking at fish shows. (ed. snore) But that shows director Mark Mullane has moved to Toronto after seperating from his wife and former Street Cents co-worker Allison Dixon. She is just cute as a button. (ed. um, thi is starting to sound like some sort of gossip rag)

Corus has taken the knife out and cut, amongst other departments, development staff from YTV (Bonieta Siegal) and The Movie Network (Shelley Gillan). Should they be doing that, with another pay tv movie channel launching shortly?

And speaking of breaking up, Jeff Rosen who created Bo on the Go, Poko, Lunar Jim and a hundred other kids shows for Halifax Film Company is gettin a divorce. (ed. great! You got Halifax Film and a divorce scandal in the same item!) Let's hope she dosn't find out his base salary is $380,000 a year and that's without the writer's fees he farts out. Sounds like a lot but when you realize these shows are evergreen and are/will make Halifx Films millions, well, Jeff, mabe you should be making more.

Halifax Film Company Made Me Rich!

2007-10-03T13:40:00.000-03:00

Well, the financials for Halifax Film Company (aka DHX) are out and kapow! am I ever glad I didn't trade my shares with Maurice for his "slightly used" laptop. As regular readers are aware, my Father left me 1000 shares of DHX stock earlier this year when it was trading at $1.40. Now the shares are up to $1.93! This calls for Quarter Pounders with cheese tonight as a treat. Dammit, I'm getting fries too!

DHX's nine month ending March 31, 2007 results are likely what caused the increase and who would not be thrilled with those numbers. Though I don't understand a lot of the accountant's mumbo Jumbo, the report states that Revenues were up 216%! That is almost double!

The written part of the report (I had to skim most of it or fall asleep at my trusty keyboard) was joyously optomistic when it talked of the past 9 months and the future of the company. There's all kinds of new shows being produced like a show for YTV called "Clang!" Kids love that sound! It`s a Canada/Hong Kong/Singapore co-production. And I'm guessing the Hong Kongians and Singaporians are putting in the "sweat equity" and not for the money grubbing rates that animators in Canada and Korean demand! Hey, draw some food! ha! And really by hiring asian workers to create our Canadian content we are making their lives so much better. It's not like they would want a Starbucks coffee, even if they could afford it.

Anyway, in a previous blog it was noted that DHX may lose their production facilities "Electropolis" because the owner wants to charge them outrageous market rate rent instead of the below market rate Halifax Film needed these last ten years to scrabble togther a living. Luckily the company as able to make some money from third parties such as the Films Outlander and Slevin. They helped bring in $215,000. Rent was $50,000/month so thats,um, $215,000 - 50,000 X 9 = um, just a sec. MINUS $235,000! No wonder Michael Donovan is calling his landlord unfair. If on top of that he had to pay rent for the productions Bo on the Go, Lunar Jim, Mighty Jungle, Animal Mechanicals..well, you're taking the fries right out of my mouth, people.

Oh, and I finally saw Shake Hands With the Devil. My friend Maurice videotaped it at the theatre, but before you jump all over me, remember I'm unable to leave the aprtment so I probably would have had to wait a week before it finished its theatrical run in Canada and went to DVD.

I thought the film was very well made (although, Maurice, a little less camera shake next time. I can't believe you were looking for milk duds in your pocket all that time.) Horrifying story but well acted by Roy Dupreis (?) Other than him I didn't see a lot of Canadian content or Nova Scotia crew involved. oh well, those tax credits aren't so picky anymore.

I'll be back with more blogging later. My sister Stella and her Brazillian boyfriend are finally moving out, thank God! I'll have the place to myself without having worry about finding a puddle of their combined bodily fluids everywhere. Really, in the fridge? How? Why? Never mind.

I'm helping them pack to hurry them out the door. But still, I don't know how I'm going to pay the rent by myself. May have to leverage my stocks somehow.

New TV Season!

2007-09-24T21:52:00.000-03:00

Okay, the cable is finally back on and just in time for the new TV season. So I'm going to provide "Instant Reviews" of all the new shows:

The Big Bang Theory

Premise:

Hot dumb chick lives next door to two nerds. Hilarity ensues?

Characters:

We know they're nerds because they have a white board of algorithmic equations in their kitchen, they dress like what real nerds tend to avoid and cool guys wear to look hip, they say "coitus" and their showercurtain is the periodic table.

The female is a dumb blonde slut, but not the good type of slut who will sleep with a nerd. (Really if I were a woman, this would totally piss me off. The character is like a dumber Suzanne Summers)

Demographic:

Would be teenage boys if this were 1976 and/or internet porn wasn't invented.

Overall Opinion:

I came in here to blog until Two and a Half Men comes on. Sad on many levels.

Halifax CBC Shakeup!

2007-09-19T09:11:00.000-03:00

Last week my friend Maurice attended a CBC luncheon as part of the Atlantic Film Festival. As my readers know, I'm unable to leave the apartment so Maurice has become sort of my eyes and ears of the tangible tv film industry in Halifax. He also helps edit this blog and because he's a struggling scriptwriter (ed. is there any other kind in Canada) he wants to remain anonymous so we'll just refer to him as "ed".

To backtrack, several weeks ago we reported that Ron Crocker the Regional Head for the Maritimes "retired" and Andrew Cochrane took over. One of the first things Cochrane did was hire Peter Coade away from rival CTV to bring us the supper time weather. Previously the weather was read to us by anchor Norma Lee McLeod (ed. she was especially good at telling us when it was going to be icy.).

So at the CBC luncheon, it was announced that was only one of several changes that were going to happen over the next few weeks. Yesterday another change was announced, Norma Lee was being replaced at the desk by former anchor from years gone by Jum Nunn!

Now Jimbo left his anchor position years ago, went to Toronto to host Marketplace, left or was made to leave, and returned to Halifax. For the last few years he filled a seat as a"producer" waiting for his pension to kick in and bemoaning his fate.

Until this week. Oh, to be a fly on the wall when Norma Lee was told "we're thinking of some changes". Norma Lee had only taken over the desk from Linda Kelly after Nancy Waugh returned to head the newsroom. (ed. "Linda, we're thinking of making some changes." )

I'm sure there were public smiles all around but I bet it's a chilly ole newsroom.

Electropolis Vermin!

2007-09-19T09:01:00.000-03:00

On top of Michael Donavan's company DHX aka Halifax Film Company being squeezed for more money to lease the Electropolis Soundstage, Frank Magazine is reporting the place is invested with Rats! Mind you, only the grunt workers toil away there, management firmly esconcened above a Starbooks on Spring Garden Road, so there's no worries, right?

Wrong! Apparently these particular rats are fond of stop motion animation puppets and have kidnapped them. The fact that these puppets cost thousands of dollars is one thing but the thought of Poko or Minus being dragged off frantically waving for help (ed. albeit frantic would be one movement a minute for the little guys) is sickening.

This of course is the government's fault and they should step in and subsidize the lease costs for the struggling international distributor.

Electropolis in Ruins!

2007-09-18T12:57:00.000-03:00

With the Atlantic Film Festival still in full swing and a new and improved tax credit announced, Halifax's production community has been dealt a debilitating blow. Nova Scotia Power, the province's electricity provider has singlehandedly killed the industry by bolting the doors and throwing out the tenants from the Electropolis sound stage in downtown Halifax. (ed. metephorically speaking that is).

In an announcement today Michael Donovan (ed. Mr. Oscar (tm), to you) has received news that he will have to vacate the building where shows like Bo on the Go, Lunar Jim etc, have and are being produced.

The Chronicle Herald quotes the Oscar (tm) winner ""They want us out," he said, adding that while NSPI can do what it wants with the property, he isn’t happy about the way negotiations took place. "We feel very badly treated.""

"Utility spokeswoman Margaret Murphy called the "unfortunate situation" an impasse between a landlord that wants to increase its lease price to better reflect current market conditions and a tenant that had enjoyed a favourable long-term lease."

Apparently Donovan's company DHX Media signed a lease ten years ago (ed. wouldn't that have been Salter Street Films?) agreeing to pay $50,000 a year lease. The contract also stated that after the ten years were up, the lease amount would rise to $500,000 which is about the actual operating cost of the building.

According to "a close friend", The gold statuette recipient is baffled at how the corporate monster NSPI would actually hold him to a signed legal contract thet bleeds his company of close to the market value of the property. After all, he did win an Oscar (tm). (ed. Enough)

Surely to God the government of Nova Scotia will step in and buy the property to avoid the sad sight of Poko and Minus packing up their meagre belongings and shuffling down the side of the road looking for a small corner to film his adventures in.

The government did come through last week after producers in town held a hunger strike (ed. actually they just cut out carbs for a few days). The tax credit on Nova Scotian labour has been increased to 50% + 5% for "frequent flyers" and another 10% for shooting in rural nova scota. (ed. really, isn't it all rural?) At a potential 65%, this tax credit is the highest in North America. And luckily for Halifax Film Nova Scotia Labour still counts people from Ontario who come to work here.

So, i urge everyone to call their MLA's and the premier's office to beg for their support to get Electropolis out of the hands of the spoiler of dreams NSPI and back into the hands of the free-"ish" marketplace.

Halifax Film should not have to did into their $25M IPO, their $1M provincial labour grant, or the money coming in from international sales of its evergreen children's programming. And I'm not saying this because I own 1000 shares of DHX (ed. presently at $1.70 where you acquired it)

Crocker Jumps From Dreadnought CBC to....? Theodore Tugboat Dad Takes Corner Office!

2007-08-03T20:09:00.000-03:00

Ron Crocker, the El Capitan of CBC Halifax has retired and will be replaced by former independant producer, bearded man, Andrew Cochran.

Andrew, of course is the man behind the Theodore Tugboat TV show, life-size replica, (ed. Don't say there's a Theodore Tugboat panty liner; that would be so old and predictable.) and expensive toy line.

After Theodore struck the big metaphoric iceberg and declared bankruptcy, the affable boat was sold to a local businessman so he could take whiney tourists on a tour of halifax harbour, where their kids could watch human waste float to the surface becoming part of the wonderful cycle of life (ed. get on with it!), Andrew sort of disappeared off the production map.

But locals, although surprised by the turn of events, are overall happy that Andrew will be standing in the wheelhouse of the Halifax CBC, although it could be described as a sinking ship.

The once busy plant (Streetcents, Land and Sea, that Mary Walsh Book show, and numerous pilots produced for Michael Donovan whenever a fart of an idea wafted out of him), now only has This Hour for part of the year and the supper hour news (ed. that's dinner for people east of N.B. Thats New Brunswick, sorry.)

Ron Crocker, a former news guy, has been struggling to make the news work. First T.O. cut the one hour news in half and the budget with it, then they demanded the one hour production back but with no matching budget increase.

Most people know that Toronto wants the Halifax entity gone; they've been winnowing the employees down over the past ten years. If there's to be any production at all out of CBC Halifax five years from now, it will be done by independant producers and the space where the CBC Tv station has stood for fifty years will be a parking lot.

Welcome to The Twilight Zone, Andrew Cochran.

And although the official word is that Ron Crocker is "retiring", the word on the street is that he will be joing The Halifax Film Company, but in what capacity, no one knows. Perhaps he'll take over Michael's duties which include....?

Summertime and the Blogging ain't Easy

2007-07-31T08:06:00.000-03:00

Taking a break for a few weeks. Back when the new season starts.

CBC strikes Gold!

2007-07-17T20:44:00.000-03:00

Well, it did years ago when there wasn't so much competition. I found this site that offers synopsis of old Canadian TV shows. These sound interesting:

CHRYSLER FESTIVAL

CBC / 6x60m-e / 1956-57

Executive Producer: Stuart W. Griffiths

Variety series broadcast from Loew's Uptown Theatre in Toronto. Hosted by Elaine Grand and Hume Cronyn. Some big names appeared including the Dave Brubeck Quartet, Earth Kitt, Shirley Jones, Peter Sellers, Jose Greco, Dorothy Dandridge, Kaye Ballard and the Oscar Peterson Trio.

CHARLIE HAD ONE BUT HE DIDN'T LIKE IT SO HE GAVE IT TO US

CBC / x30m-e / 1966 (20 July - 12 October / Wednesday 11.40pm)

Producer: Terry Kyne

Eccentric sketch series starring Paul Soles and Barrie Baldaro with a different guest star each week.

(ed. A late night sketch comedy show with a different host each week? Crazy. No wonder it didn't last.)

THE COLLABORATORS

CBC / x60m-e / 1973-74 (16 December 73 - 1 December 74 / Sunday 9.00pm)

Creator: Richard Gilbert

Crime drama series. Cases of a group of forensic scientists heavily involved in solving crimes for the police.

With:- MICHAEL KANE as Detective Sergeant Jim Brewer / PAUL HARDING as Dr Charles Erickson / TOBY TARNOW as Liz Roman / DONALD PILON as Detective Sergeant Richard Tremblay (season 2) / LAWRENCE BENEDICT as Detective Quinn / LESLIE CARLSON as Detective Kaminski

(ed. Forensic scientists solving crimes? Ludicrous.)

COMING UP ROSIE

CBC / x30m-e / 1975-78 (15 September 75 - 28 March 78)

Writers: Barbara Evans, David Mayerovitch, Stuart Northey / Executive Producer: Don Elder / Producer/Director: Trevor Evans (seasons 1-2), Hedley Read (season 3)

Teen sitcom. Misadventures of Rosie Tucker, a film school graduate, who is determined to make a name for herself as a documentary film maker.

With:- ROSEMARY RADCLIFFE as Rosie Tucker / BARRIE BALDARO as Dudley Nightshade / DAN HENNESSEY as Ralph Oberding / FIONA REID as Mona Swicker / CATHERINE O'HARA as Myrna Wallbacker / JOHN CANDY as Wally Wypyzychwk / DAN ACKROYD as Parks Bickle / JOHN STOCKER as Dwayne Kramer

(Ed. I loved this show!)

DR ZONK AND THE ZUNKINS

CBC / 30x30m-e / 1974-75 (23 September 74 - 14 April 75/ Mondays/Wednesdays/Fridays 4.30pm)

Producer: Don Elder / Director: Trevor Evans

Children's sketch series based around young Billy Meek and the contents of his imagination. Robin Eveson played Billy Meek and featured amongst the cast were a young John Candy, Gilda Radner, Bob McKenna, Rosemary Radcliffe, Fiona Reid and Dan Hennessey.

(ed. Never saw this but it sounds intriguing.)

QUENTIN DURGENS M.P.

CBC / x60m-e / 1966-71

Creator: George Robertson / Producer: David Gardner / Executive Producer: Ronald Weyman

Drama series. Rural MP Quentin Durgens juggles his constituency duties in the small town of Hampton County with his role as a back bencher in Ottawa. The show grew out of a six parter called Mr Member of Parliament that appeared as part of The Serial.

With:- GORDON PINSENT as Quentin Durgens / SUZANNE LEVESQUE as 'Toinette / OVILA LGAR as Letourneau

(ed.This was a good show.)

THE RAY STEVENS SHOW

CTV / 8x60m-e / 1970

Writers: Jack Hanrahan, Phil Hahn / Executive Producers: Allan Blye, Chris Beard, Murray Chercover

Sketch based comedy series starring American comedy singer (The Streak) as well as an up and coming Steve Martin, Mama Cass of Mama's and the Papa's, Lulu, Billy Van and Dick Curtis.

(ed. During the seventies alot of entertainers had a variety show on CBC, Noel Coward, Wolfman Jack, Ray Stevens, Rolf Harris. I think there were Canadian hosts too.)

WOJECK

CBC / 20x60m-e / 1967-68

Creator: Philip Hersch

Medical/crime drama series featuring the cases of crusading Toronto Chief Coroner Dr Steve Wojeck who tackled head on all manner of controversial subjects. Wojeck's wife was Marty, Arnold Bateman was the cop Wojeck often called upon. See also below for the TV Movie revival called Wojeck: Out of the Fire.

With:- JOHN VERNON as Dr Steve Wojack / PATRICK COLLINS as Marty Wojeck / TED FOLLOWS as Arnold Bateman / CARL BANAS as Sgt Byron James

(ed. Again with the crazy ideas, a coroner solving crime.

"Billable Hours". Why it will fail!

2007-07-15T22:50:00.001-03:00

Okay, I just finished watched an episode of Billable Hours on Showcase. It has broken the following cardinal rules:

(1) There are no totally good people and totally bad people.

As a rep from CTV/Comedy told me not too long ago, a script must have a good guy and a bad guy. Seems pretty simple, people. I mean in real life we walk down the street and see black hats and white hats. Thank god we don't have to take the time to get to know people and their motives. But I just hate those grey hatted people. Pick a side! As an example, Corner Gas, the most sucessful Canadian comedy ever has it's memorable good guys, most of the town, and the "bad guys" who would be....um, well, there was that gov't guy, but then he turned out alright, and then, oh, the dog that bit...someone....

(2) They curse.

CTV played the Sopranos uncut. There was cursing and killing and nudity and nobody (really CRTC did not register one complaint) cared. In the states Janice Jackson's nipple ended her career and started an no-win war in the mid-east. So Billable Hours will not translate into the U.S. on ABC Family. The characters curse like real people. It's like Temple Street Productions and Showcase televsion didn't care about an improbable international sale to the U.S.

(3) They make unnecessary references to Canada

They actually don't hide being Canadian. They even make fun of "Alberta" which is a state like Texas, only colder.

So, a Canadian show that talks like real people, has characters like real people and is blatently Canadian.

I'm stuck for words. I have to think.

So here's what I think. (ed. you know who you're cable/internet provider is?)

I just watched a smart, funny show on TV. The characters were well drawn, the comedy subtle yet accessible, (ed. and funny!) the production values were terrific. (ed. they were really, multiple sets, beautiful details (ed. small things on desks, though periperal, spoke to the character)truly)).

One scene had a "little person" for lack of a politically correct term, but he was not singuled out, he was not the butt of a joke; he was another character that happened to work in the office. Seinfeld did that and I loved it.

Billable Hours is a well-acted, well-written, well-executed TV show. (ed. the visuals were great, there was one scene where the main characters were arguing while walking through an office, it looked very real)

I wish everyone involved success in California.

X&Z on Definition? And They Say Canadian Game Shows Aren't Exciting!

2007-07-11T22:10:00.000-03:00

If only the theme song was here:

And I remember this clip from The Frantics fondly:

The Simpsons in Canada:

Steve Martin in Toronto:

My DHX (Halifax Film Company) Stock is up to $1.54/share. My 1000 shares acquired at $1.40 is looking good.

Just Tidying Up.

2007-07-07T22:36:00.000-03:00

Few more things before I get into what's been happening here:

- My DHX Stock is at $1.45. Up $.05 from acquisition price. (ed. You know, it's odd that there's no "cents" sign on a computer keyboard, isn't it?) I only have 1000 shares but I'm in a quandry as to hold tight or sell. After all, two weeks ago Charles Bishop, one of the founders of DHX, sold 250,000 shares. Would he know something I don't? Naw, I'm sure it was just a cash flow thing. I think I'll hang on especially with the news that Halifax Film (DHX) is doing a show for the CBC about spelling bees. Sounds like "ca-ching, bling, bling" is headed my way.

- A local comedy troupe (ed. or troop?) is making waves locally. Picnisface has had some of it's videos featured on Will Farrell's website so naturally as a Canadian, I am proud to now feature them and claim them as a national treasure; (ed. we haven't seen the video ourselves, but if an American says its good...)

But first!

Youtube. Apparently Women Parking is bigger than porn in Germany, judging by the number of videos posted on the topic.

Now Picnicface:

Not really my cup of tea but whatever makes the world go round.

Everybody Wang Chung Tonight.

2007-07-07T00:07:00.000-03:00

Eh, not really.

I don't have much time but here's a few tidbits:

- While surfing I found this description on Winkopedia about the CBC/Halifax Film Company show Poko. This is verbatim;

"In August 28, 2008, Season 3 of Poko will be added 3 characters will be added and Poko got a bigger house for 3 more.

Troy He lives with Poko. He is newborn. He sleeps during the outside scene.

Lip Lock Lip Lock lives with Bibi. Lip Lock kisses. She is a cat. On the outside episode, Lip Lock chased Minus.

Sharon Sharon was Poko's new friend she is 9 years old. When Sharon says 'TAKE A BOW!' Poko, Bibi, Lambert, Lip Lock, Minus and Troy bowed. Sharon was sometimes shorten to Share which Poko called out Sharon.

Quiz will be planned to be on Season three of Poko on September 3, 2008."

Does the above sound like some sort of Eastern European satire? It's either briliantly satirical or fucking stupid.

- www.gov.ns.ca/nsarm/databases/easterneye/history.asp

This is the website for a history of film in Nova Scotia. An except follows;

"The second private motion picture company established in Nova Scotia was the less prolific but equally important Maritime Motion Picture Company (MMPC).

Canadian in its philosophy but less so in its practice. While most of the productions were filmed in Cape Breton and Atlantic Canada and told Canadian stories, the company imported most of its directors, casts, and crews from the United States. (WTF?) This practice was not uncommon across the country during these early years of film production when trained personnel were hard to come by.

A report to shareholders in 1922 stated,

It [the newly-released Sea Riders] has been well received wherever screened [and] the returns have been unexpectedly big ... outstanding evidence of the fact that the Canadian people will, if given the opportunity, support and give a preference to Made in Canada products.15"

So, we've been deceiving ourselves for a looongg time.

Anyway, Paris Hilton bumped Michael Moore from The Larry King Show. Ya know, if she hadn't invented a cure for cancer I would be a little miffed.

In local film news, there's a website that promises to entertain you with original content. Another website/blogger that promises to make television obsolite. If only. I've surfed it and found myself going, "yawn, okay, that's cute". I can't recommend it as a great way to spend an evening but it is local.

www.untv.ca

Okay, Dire Straits

2007-06-27T23:46:00.000-03:00

Saw them in concert, saved me from disco, the best band ever!! Yeah, Yeah Rolling Stones, Beatles, blah, blah, blah. Just sit back. play this and chill.

and this

Help me lord, I had the 8 track!

Gavin Crawford. You are a Hissyfit!

2007-06-26T22:48:00.000-03:00

I think this was somthing spontaneous which I'm totally for. Hanging around getting make-up on, Mr. Crawford, had fun. This is what it should be about.

You'll notice that Mark Farell plays the producer/showrunner and I was struck by something he wrote on another blog, "Too many people in our industry (and I'm not by any means the first to make this point) think that just getting something made or on-air is enough. It isn't."

I think he's totally right on this point. So many productions have come about because it was a job, signed, sealed and delivered by the producer and the broadcaster. It doesn't mean that the writers should shrug their shoulders and say this is only a paycheck and when I get my own show, I'll show'em! (ed. guilty).

Write, fight and smite to get good stuff on the air. It is possible. Even if you have to sneak it under the radar.

Now for a completely different topic, I came across this on YouTube; The Doors doing "The End". (ed. genuflect here). It was supposedly for Canadian TV but was it shot here? Who knows. The guy introducing it I think is Noel Harrison, son of Rex Harrison, who had his own variety show on CBC, shot in Halifax. Jim Morrison in Halifax? Doubt it. But whatever.

The year is 1967, Expo '67 blooms, a younger Jay Leno perfects his stand-up and Paris Hilton is not even imagined as possibly existing. sigh.

Distribute This!

2007-06-24T22:17:00.000-03:00

I read in the paper where Paul Gross, David Cronenberg and friends are upset that the distribution arm of Alliance Atlantis is selling itself to an American company (with a Canadian partner doing the Canadian rubber stamping, of course).

If it goes through, the millions and millions of dollars that the taxpayers of this country (that's ...some of you) will have been spent for naught. The money was paid out to promote Canadian films. That will end.

But why all this fuss over a distributor? What do they do? Well, they are an integrel cog in the motion picture industry in this and other countries.

Although, complex, I'll try and simplify it. Basically, when a motion picture is "produced" in Hollywood, it has to be transported to the actual movie theatre; it doesn't just get dropped off by courier! (duh!). So when "Live Long or Die Harder" is "released", the "studio" sends the actual "film" to a "distributor", who receives it and then "couriers" it to the actual movie theatres across Canada.

Naturally this service dictates a fee (40% of the gross?). And since Alliance Atlantis knows all the street addresses of the movie theatres in Canada they are the main distributor for this country.

Oh, and they also promote (P & A) the film in Canada, because "Live Free or Die Harder" would be shown to empty seats in this country if somebody didn't tell the public it was playing.

I remember Michael MacMillan coming to Halifax years ago earestly explaining to the concerned production community, that the takeover of Salter Street Films would not be an abandonment of production in the city. Rumours were rife that they had purchased Salter Street only to acquire the IFC but he denied this and Michael Donovan to this day denies thats what it was about.

Alliance Atlantis wanted to buy Salter Street because of it's library (Do old Codco's have an aftermarket?) and its current production slate e.g. 22 Minutes, Poko (in development at the time).

So the sale went through and Alliance Atlantis did maintain a presence in town, the IFC has one employee with a phone. They sold all the buildings Salter Street owned and threw Poko and 22 Minutes back to Michael Donovan.

So, let's give the guy the benefit of the doubt, ....again.

As a BTW, my 1000 shares of DHX (Halifax Film Company) is down to $1.38/share. They were acquired at $1.40/share. (1000 x .02 = $20) Not much I know but if it were up the same amount I would be happier.

Why Do Pickles Exist?

2007-06-23T23:10:00.000-03:00

I wanted to clean out the fridge and amongst the various "things" there is a Bottle of tiny dill pickles. No one living here likes tiny dill pickles, why are they here, where the F*** did they come from!? I'm tossing them!

More on tv later, things have been too flux-a-tating here lately.

Global! Your Proud CANADIAN Brodcaster!

2007-06-19T23:16:00.000-03:00

In local production news, a documentary produced by Arcadia Productions of Halifax found the golden horseshoe. They were in the carribean shooting a documentary called "Going Down" (which in an earlier blog I mistakenly identified as an "L Word" type of show), they had finished filming an ordinary scene where divers prepared to dive and went overboard. As the hauled the anchor up, it was snagged on a treasure chest full of, well treasure. Good for them, hurrah.)

Anyway, Last week Global television announced it's fall schedule. I know I'm a bit late but it wasn't in the papers or on tv (but then they probably didn't advertise it during the 15 hour Simpson's marathon)

But I'll let them speak for themselves (with a few comments from me and excuse me if the cosmopolitans are kicking in)

"CanWest MediaWorks Announces Original Production Slate for 2007-2008

Global Television and E! (This was originally CH from Hamilton who I remember as the small station that tried. And they did. They did local programming for the country, "Tiny Talent Time" and I believe "House of Frightenstein". Anyway now it will be a 24 hour station dedicated to Canadians in the entertainment industry. That means if a Tom Cruise movie shoots in Montreal we'll be treated to a sassy portrait of Tom, probably wearing those RayBans from 40 years ago)

With 20 Original Series Premieres...Over 100 Hours of Scripted Content...Over 80 Hours of Premiere Documentaries, and Nearly 200 Hours of Entertainment News... (My God! Original...scripted content...Premiere Documentaries...Canadian TV has finally come into its own! Except for the 200 hours of TomCat, Maghaughey, etc)

Broadcaster Continues To Grow Critically-Acclaimed Development & Production Commitments (Continues? Did I miss something last year?)

(TORONTO) CanWest MediaWorks today announced details of its Original Production slate at their annual Upfront Presentation to advertisers and industry in Toronto.

Across primetime on Global Television and the all-new E! network, CanWest has positioned over 100 debut hours of scripted content, (okay, got it. Details, please)

over 80 hours of showcased documentaries and nearly 200 hours of entertainment news.

Building on what industry and press have tagged as a ‘turnaround’ year (who said that? It's in quotes so I'm sure someone did) for CanWest's Original Productions, the focus remains on expanding the commitment to developing and producing the best of Canadian drama, comedy, documentary and more (yes, yes, God, yes!) – and integrating these into the nation's most critically acclaimed primetime schedules. (um, okay, I'll play along caught up in the enthusiasm as I am)

"We're incredibly proud of our team, and the wide range of work that is being commissioned," said Barbara Williams, CanWest MediaWorks Senior Vice President of Programming and Production. (Wow, fit that on a nameplate. Barbara used to be an Alliance Atlantis Senior ...something) "Our promise to build on quality, diversity and the country's leading edge creative alliances remains strong, and is at the core of all of our 2007-2008 original product. (Heehee, okay, sorry. I know she has to say this but who is she talking too? Sorry, I'm just reacting based on past history. Apparently they have changed.) We're looking forward to a fantastic new season." (Us too. Sounds like a lot of work for Canadian creatives. And crew, of course. If you're not busy on The Hulk II)

As the CanWest commitment to original programming grows, (snicker, sorry, but it can't do anything but grow, can it?) the broadcaster's creative partnerships with a myriad of producing partners - from across Canada and around the world - have formed a strong foundation for an exciting roster of new content, set to debut this season and in the months to come. Premiere strategic partners include Movie Central, The Movie Network, The NFB, APTN, The BBC, Lifetime, USA Sci-Fi Network, and ABC Family. (uh oh, they don't sound Canadian Contenish at all)

New titles debuting on Global Television for the 2007-2008 season include: West coast action-drama, SEARCH AND RESCUE: From Halifax Film Company and Brightlight Pictures with Exec Producers Ray Storey, Michael Donovan, Charles Bishop (Bowling for Columbine)(that was their brackets not mine. They just want to point out that the guy who signed some cheques on Michael Moore's documentary will have his name in the credits of whatever this is)...Neighbourhood comedy 'DA KINK IN MY HAIR: From Barna Alper Productions, Exec Producer Laszlo Barna, Damian Nurse, Ngozi Paul and trey anthony - based on anthony's multi-award winning play of the same name (ethnic, okay that's good.) ...Coming-of-age college comedy, ABOUT A GIRL: From Brightlight Pictures and Exec Producer Steve Hegyes, starring Chiara Zanni, Jesse Hutch (hmm, sounds ABC Family'ish. But then they wouldn't traipse into Falcon Beach Territory again, would they? No, that would be just....)

Oil industry thriller, BURN UP: From Producers Tom Cox and Jordy Randall - a BBC co-production from Kudos Film and TV (UK) and Seven 24 Films Inc., (Hmm, BBC/Alberta co-pro. Why do I get the feeling the Alberta producers were tour guides? Don't know for sure but I never heard of them)

Psychological thriller, DURHAM COUNTY: From Exec Producers Janis Lundman, Adrienne Mitchell, Michael Prupas. Co-Developed and Commissioned by CanWest, DURHAM COUNTY is now set for its conventional network premiere. (check the word "conventional", it's been on TMN for a month, now)

In addition, all-new original documentaries arrive on the Global Television slate for 2007-2008, as GLOBAL CURRENTS with Host Kevin Newman marks its third season. (snore) A weekly, original strand that explores social issues and perspectives relevant to Canadians, GLOBAL CURRENTS is a showcase for independent producers from every corner of the country.

(i.e. Dearest CRTC, we are committed to telling Canadian stories to Canadians and have spent thousands of dollars on director/writers grateful for the opportunity. These documentaries will show in the prime viewing slot of Saturdays after golf and before a Simpsons rerun. Hey, if it doesn't get ratings, maybe we should just give up on this whole idea of Canadian content. Canadians are too smart for what we can deliver so we should give them the programming we deserve such as House, and Entertainment...whatever. After all if we want to profile Canadian talent, we should really look to the U.S. who hire a lot of our writers, House..etc)

Continuing the CanWest commitment to documentaries - now in true E! style - the network is proud to announce an all-new showcase, "ON E!", featuring a variety of entertainment-focused documentary series including: Musical-moms-on-a-mission, (oh, my God! WTF is this?)

SHAYE: From Breakthrough Film & TV and Exec Producer Ira Levy, featuring Kim Stockwood, Damhnait Doyle and Tara MacLean (eastern talent as only a Toronto broadcaster can show) ...On set in Hollywood North with adrenaline junkies, (um, yeah)

STUNT STARS: From Montreal's CMJ Productions and Exec Producer John Kuyk...Never call them "cover bands", TRIBUTE - THE NEXT BEST THING: From Fall From Grace Prod's and Exec Producers Michelle Metivier and Allison Grace...And the dangerous world of celebrity diets, break-ups and breakdowns, INSIDE HOLLYWOOD: From Producer Larry Day at Pyramid Productions. (sigh)

Also this Fall, E! network original debuts include...A look at homegrown legends on E! TRUE HOLLYWOOD STORY: CANADIAN EDITION... An unconventional, in-depth take on celebrity news, trends and lifestyles, E! LIVE...And over 20 homegrown MOWs, E! MOVIES WE LOVE: From CanWest, with Lifetime Network and a wide range of Canadian Producing Partners including Shaftesbury Films, ThunderBird Films, Insight Film Studios and Muse Entertainment. (Christ!)

SEARCH AND RESCUE
(13 x 1 hour; drama)
This exciting drama follows the lives of four Canadian Coast Guards, trained to expect the unexpected in their work, but never ready for it in their personal lives. Viewers can follow the adventures of these offbeat heroes whose greatest search will be for meaning in their own lives. A co-production from Halifax Film Company (Michael Donavan and Charles Bishop) and Brightlight Pictures (Steve Hegyes); created by Michael Donavan and Ray Storey. (God, help me!)

‘DA KINK IN MY HAIR
Sundays – 7:30pm
(13 x 30 min; comedy)
The highly anticipated comedy based on trey anthony's multi award-winning play of the same name. Letty's, a bustling hair salon in Toronto's Caribbean community, serves as a platform for a group of women to share their trials, tribulations and deep dark secrets. Viewers can watch as these strong, black women let their hair down – in more ways than one. Series created by trey anthony and Ngozi Paul; Executive Produced by Damion Nurse, Laszlo Barna, trey anthony, Ngozi Paul and Shelly Scarrow.

CAST: Ordena Stephens-Thompson, Ngozi Paul, trey anthony, Conroy Stewart, Richard Fagon (Yeah, okay, this might actually be interesting)

ABOUT A GIRL
(13 x 30 min; comedy)
College student Amy Ryan never thought she would find herself living in an off-campus house along with four male roommates. She's now got a direct line to the male species and what makes them tick – and the guys now have a chick to take out the garbage. What they will learn from each other is more than any classroom could ever teach. From Producer Steve Hegyes (White Noise). (Canadian?)
CAST: Chiara Zanni, Jesse Hutch (Smallville) (Canadian?)

BURN UP
(2 x 2 hour; mini-drama)
This two-part, high-stakes conspiracy thriller is set against the backdrop of the world's corrupt and violent oil industry. This drama focuses on the desperate attempts of those trying to save the planet from global warming while uncovering the truth of oil reserves in Alberta, the southern United States and the Middle East. A co-production of Seven 24 Films Inc. ( Alberta) and Kudos Film and TV (UK). (snore. I wonder what side of global warming they come out on)

KILLER WAVE
(2 x 2 hour; drama)
An action-disaster mini-series about a conspiracy theory come true. A large corporation conspires to devastate North American cities on the east coast with tidal waves so that it can win a multi-billion dollar contract from the government to build a seawall along the eastern seaboard. Directed by Bruce McDonald; from Muse Entertainment, Montreal. (A multi-billion dollar contract from the Canadian government? We're not talking advertising, people. Oh, NORTH America. International sales, anybody)
CAST: Angus MacFadyen, Karine Vanasse, Stephen McHattie

DURHAM COUNTY
(6 x 1 hour; drama)
An emotionally powerful series revolving around Detective Mike Sweeney, his family and a potential serial killer who lives across the street. As Sweeny hunts down his murderous neighbour, the differences between the cop and the killer become blurry. With a shared history that goes all the way back to high school, Sweeney learns you can’t always leave your past behind. Produced by Muse Entertainment in Montreal.

CAST: Helene Joy, Sonya Salomaa, Laurence Leboeuf, Greyston Holt, Hugh Dillon, Justin Louis (Okay, this might actually be good from what I hear, but it's not a Global original)

That's all I'm going to blog tonight.

My Banff Corrsespondant Shows Up...in the Middle of a Melee!

2007-06-16T22:39:00.000-03:00

Last week my friend Wendall went off to Banff to report on the future of Canadian television and found himself in the middle of a protest from a group of writers who felt television should concern itself with quality story telling rather than the interests of investors who risk their assets off so the industry can actually exist! People, please! Priorities!

Anyway, I haven't heard from him since that skirmish, until yesterday when he called from downtown Halifax on the pay-as-you-go cell phone, we chipped in on. He was unable to recall the missing five days, other than there were a lot of shrimp cocktails, Sambuca body shots and apparently he now has a development deal with a major U.K. broadcaster on a reality show about beavers.

I'll give you the ghist of his phone call. Yesterday was an interesting day in normally quiet Halifax.

Wendall:

"I'm downtown, apparently, where all hell has broken loose. I awoke on the curb, to find myself among a dozen protestors who were defending themselves against the Halifax Police. From what I can see, the protestors, all dressed in black, including stylish headcoverings and baklava's (ed. they tried to disguise themselves with greek pastry on their faces?), and identical vintage Doc Martin's, were peacefully walking down the street carrying a few garbage can lids, just for style, when a police officer approached on a bicycle and brazenly offended them by asking how their day was going.

The protestors felt cornered and defended themselves accordingly; luckily they were all geode fanatics and had some of the sparkly, seemingly unoffending pieces of Mother Nature on their person.

As usual, police overreacted and held up their hands in a "let's calm down" provocative manner. That's when I apparently lost conciousness.

When I awoke, one of the protestors was using me as a human shield as he attempted to re-decorate the Toronto-Dominion bank with light bulbs full of paint. (ed. Thank God! I really am sick of that green colour everywhere.)

The protestor, 'Grellum', defended his actions by saying his act of throwing paint at the outside of a building will "make those people trying to shove Atlantica down our throats to reconsider their options!" (ed. I know what you mean. I once saw some graffeti on a mail box that said "save our planet" and I didn't litter that day!)

I asked him what he had against "Atlantica" and said it was a tool for corporations to oppress the dis-advantaged.

As the pepper spray cried away from my face (ed. should have been wearing some sort of international pastry!), I asked him what "Atlantica" was. He looked at me like I called his sister a whore, then hit me in the knee with a can of organic coffee, while calling me a facist. Excellent point, I thought, as I crumbled to the ground.

Later in the Halifax PD lock-up, I had a chance to talk to several of the protestors. I wanted to know why they had travlled from Montreal, Toronto and Truro; what had raised their ire so much that they were willing to risk....well, just having their picture taken being arrested.

'Cohan', a radical protestant anarchist from Montreal said he had travelled by train, and all the hardships that comes with that, to add his voice against the concept of "Atlantica" which would reduce the minimum wage, (ed. But even in Nova Scotia isn't every business scrambling for workers offering unheard of wages for semi-skilled and un-skilled labour?), create a double teared (his pronounciation, not mine, *snicker*) health care system, and allow cloned vegetables to rule the streets.

I asked Joshua from Toronto why he had travelled to Halifax, other then the fact his airmiles were expiring soon, and he responded that he'd rather be here fighting the oppresive forces of "Atlantica" than going to school or volunteering in his community because it was "betterest" and "really cool". Also Becky hated oppressive regimes and she is totally hot with her pierecd things.

Confused, I asked Caleb from Cape Breton why he was here and his response was ' I likes to throw rocks at things, but like, if I'm in North Sydney throwing rocks at telephone poles, no one's goin' chase me. What the hell fun is dat!"

As the commissionairres gave us sandwiches, cold and on white bread not whole wheat, pigs!, I had to ask the question to my cellmates; what is "Atlantica", exactly? "

That's when I lost the feed.

Wendall, I'll make some phone calls and try and get you out of there. If only I could leave the apartment.

Lost in Banff. My Correspondent Goes Missing.

2007-06-13T22:53:00.000-03:00

Busy few days at the apartment. I haven't seen much of my sister and her boyfriend Carl, the Brazillian Bushman/millionaire. She came home tonight to drop off my whopper with cheese and she couldn't stop giggling.

Apparently she was at the drug store and she found it funny that in the same display rack where they had the pregnancy tests, they had the condoms for sale. Yeah okay, ironic depending on how you look at it. Depending on what you were shopping for.

My Banff corespondant Wendell has apparently disappeared. He sent a report two nights ago and the only time I've heard from him since was an incomprehensible rant from his cellphone. If any of you in Banff see an tall, skinny, impossibly white almost transluscent, yahoo asleep in the ditch, give him a poke would you and send him on his way home.

Mia Farrow was on The Hour tonight. I always wondered how she could go from Frank to Woody? They're like polar opposites in every way. But I doubt she got asked the question

Chaos at Banff TV Festival!

2007-06-11T21:06:00.000-03:00

Well, the Banff Film Festival is underway and memories of fruit plates, white wine and tasty threesomes (every party seemed to have the same combination of brie, ghouda and for the meek, chedder.)

But since I'm unable to leave my apartment, my friend Wendall, usually my editor, has gone in my stead. So I'll be editing for him for a change. From the sounds of things, I'm missing one of the most active Banffs in a while, if not ever. Here's his report.

Wendall - Chaos has broken loose here in Banff for the first time since the cancellation of "Silk Stalkings" which tore assunder the co-operation between the best of Canadian television and really late night CBS.

There have been rumours of protests for weeks but nobody expected what happened here today. This morning just after a light brunch of crepes and fresh fruit, a group of individuals (ed. is it a group or are they individuals?), gathered on the front lawn in a threatening manner.

As producers, broadcasters and assorted "assistants, i.e. not wives" were peacefully smoozing, a small cadre of writers organized and stormed the main room where Fran Drescher was holding court on the effects of ethnicity and nasal whining on sitcoms . Sally Struthers had barely begun her rebutal when the writers strode in screaming "winter driving" according to one witness.

Although security is usually tight at the meeting of the best minds of the international broadcasting community and drunken Canadian broadcasting development officials, the RCMP were totally unprepared for this.

Staff Sargent Rideau commented that the writers had fooled guards at the security entrance, where the razor wire shone with the dashed hopes of unfufilled story ideas (ed. get to it!) The writers fooled security by busily texting, talking to their "assistants" and screaming into their blackberries as they walked through the metal detector.

"Sure they were all dressed in black and had a bleak outlook on life but, really" said Sgt Rideau, "who would have expected a Canadian writer to be taking an important call on a blackberry. Is he on-line to the set for an important piece of dialouge for a crucial scene?" He allowed himself an obvious chuckle amidst the chaos.

Most of the writers were identified as Canadian and, given that no one could name names. Except for the ringleader who couldn't help himself and gave an interview to the media.

As quoted in the Calgary Herald "The don of this mob is Canadian TV writer Denis McGrath, and just like Tony Soprano, McGrath is trying to exploit a chaotic situation for his own benefit.

McGrath and his self-described "writer's mafia" -- a.k.a.: a half dozen of his writing pals -- are hitting the Banff festival at a time when the North American television industry is in turmoil."

But today, most of McGrath's followers were distracted when a quick thinking broadcaster jumped onto a table and waved a development deal in front of the writer's faces.

Fortunately, it was an American broadcaster.

On location, I'm Wendall.

Trailer? Film?

2007-06-09T09:20:00.000-03:00

Here's a cool trailer shot in Halifax and the makers are/were from Halifax. Went to their website and it seems they did do a short film; it's on Youtube in sections, with a cheap digital camera. I like the trailer, I'll have to check out the film later. Who knows these guys might be the "next big thing". Imagine what they could do if they had my DHX money. Maybe I should invest in a small start-up company. Risky but better to have a big share of an indie blockbuster then plod along the safe corporate revenue stream like Poko stuck in the mud. I shall have to think more.

I'm Never Been So Excited to See Something Up Like This!

2007-06-09T08:56:00.000-03:00

Well, I was a bit down on DHX (ed. The Halifax Film Company, to all you non-capitalists) yesterday because my 1000 shares were down to $1.40 a share at closing on Thursday. I thought it had something to do with the fact that they are throwing stock certificates around the office like pinata stuffing, to all their imported executives. Diluting my essence , if you will.

But I should have know the wiley masters of the company were merely toying with the general stock buying public. They didn't make themselves millionaires with government money by making non-money related decisions.

Today (Friday's closing) the stock is up to $1.45! 1000 x $ .05 = $50! While I was reading my classic L'l Jinx comics, yesterday, the market was making me rich(er). And I was going to cash in and pay my Writers Guild Fees. (tsk)

I'm in this for the long haul.

Hopefully we can get the stock back up to the issue price.

http://www.tsx.com/HttpController?QuoteSymbol_1=dhx&GetPage=QuotesLookupPage&DetailedView=DetailedPrices&Market=T&Language=en&x=8&y=11

CTV GOES ALL CANADIAN!

2007-06-07T22:06:00.000-03:00

I know I'm a bit behind but things are busy here at the apartment.

I was shocked that after all the fuss over Canadian content and simul-casting, CTV has stepped up to the plate in announcing that their new fall schedule will be completely 100% Canadian developed and produced to show our Canadianish-ness (sic) to the world.

Their fall line-up was introduced by that Canadian of Canadians Jon Stwewart (ed. from the Duddy Kravitz part of Montreal, I think).

Gray's Anatomy - (Grey south of the border)- Wilfred Brimley (his nephew married a girl from Barrie) plays Gray Owl (Grey Owl) a native Canadian who performs autopsies by studying the entrails of the victims. (Thursday at 9:00)

Private Practice - Actually a spinoff of Gray's (Grey's) Anatomy, Kate Walsh (her great-grandfather landed in Halifax before emigrating to Pittsburgh). A naive American educated doctor tries to set up a practice in Toronto and runs into a bureaucratic nightmare of paperwork before she is able to see patient one, never mind Patient Zero. (Sunday, up against America Funniest Home Videos)

Criminal Minds - Something about the Conservative government. (ed. now you're not even trying). Sue me, I'm tired.

Desperate Housewives - Belinda Stronach stretches her acting by doing household chores. (Wednesdays - 100 A.M.)

Dirty Sexy Money - Donald Sutherland! Canadian! Sucessful Canadian south of the border! You got some sort of problem with this, whatever it is, being Canadian?!

There's more but time for me.

As most of you know (ed. Unless they're just skimming for their name) I inheirited 1000 shares of DHX (Halifax Film Company) and because of all the confusion around the apartment I have neglected to check their performance lately. So just hang on a minute.

Symbol Last Trade $ Change % Change
DHX 1.370 +0.010 +0.74 10,000

Okay. I'm taking a deep breath. The initial price was $1.40. And I have 1000 shares. So $.03 X 1000 shares = $30. I'm down. Crap.

Now, most of you can sit through this plunge but I am concerned. In the news today, DHX granted Cheryl Haseen 100.000 options. Just like that. Gave them to her.

They also granted David Regan (ed. a job well done, now move along.), 175,000 options.

Way to dilute my portfoilo with the wave of a pen! Did I miss a meeting?

Are we just willy-nilly throwing shares around like they're not worth the paper they're printed on?

I'm tired now but I'll continue tomorrow.

Cheryl Hassen was the former head of CBC Kids morning initiative who greenlit Poko. Linar Jim, Animal Mechanics etc. Which are DHX productions.

Please Kick Me in the Balls

2007-06-07T21:52:00.000-03:00

The following is an exact word for word quote of a news story from the Daily News Page 16 (Halifax), from last Thursday, May 31st. I am not making this up.

"Guelph, Ontario by the Canadian Press - A Guelph man accused of asking women to kick him in the groin as they jogged through a city park is free on bail today.

Court heard that in the span of one month, a man approached six women and asked them to "kick me in the balls", even telling one that his Doctor had recommended kicks as a way to cure a chemical imbalance.

Five of the women refused his request, but one kicked him four times.

The Crown told the Court the man thanked the woman and drove away on his bicycle after being kicked.

Guelph police compared the requests to indecent exposure and laid six mischief charges against 27-year-old Jarrett Loft."

Okay, I'll type it, the guy's got a lot of balls.

But I totally admire the woman who kicked him four times!

I'm Not Sensitive About My Regions

2007-06-01T22:05:00.000-03:00

Sorry it's been a while since I blogged but things have not been well here. My sister Stella's boyfriend, Brazillian Bushman/noveau riche, Carl stormed out of the apartment earlier this week taking all his stuff with him. And I missed his stuff too, especially the big screen tv.

But worse than that, Stella and I have gotten low on supplies, important stuff like food and liquor. With Stella's leg infarction acting up and the fact I can't leave the apartment, we were living like hermits. Poor Biscuitface hasn't been walked in days and if you've never seen a dog hold it in that long, well it's not a pretty sight.

But then miraculously, Carl returned. And he's returned in style. Not only has he brought back the big screen tv and La-z-boy recliners, he's brought bags of groceries, DVD's (including Excalibur and Hello Dolly!), and enough cosmopolitan supplies to keep me drunk for a year.

After he took Biscuitface out for a walk, they were gone a long time, he and Stella went to "catch up" in the other room. And after a few cosmos, I've put on my headphones with ABBA's Greatest Hits and thought I'd catch up on the latest tv stuff. (ed. as the title suggests, finally!)

My agent finally called back; he wants me to work up a pitch for a new show; a 1/2 hour ensemble, character based, non-threatening, and funny so that the whole family can enjoy. Presumably not set in Montreal, Vancouver or Toronto (ed. does that include Hamilton, London?)

My agent told me one of the networks (ed. don't you mean all of the networks?) are looking for a show like this.

I've got a few ideas, I'm tossing around in my head; How does "Little Gas Bar on the Prarie" sound? Hmmm, maybe not something so transparent

So that's kinda good news, I haven't written in years. Well, other than this blog and this is just cheaper than therapy.

Could use some good news since my DHX (Halifax Film Company) stock has fallen back down to $1.40 a share. This is where my 1000 shares was when I first got it. Can someone give the exec's there a friendly reminder they should be pumping out more production on the kids shows, please! Romeo Daillaire isn't going to make me rich!

I just found out today that those "baby carrots" you buy in the store are not young carrots! They take regular grown-up carrots and shave them down somehow (ed. like in a carrot sharpener?) so that they look small, clean and more appetizing. There's something wrong with that and I'm going to contact Marketplace right after this.

(ed. Okay, you've strayed too far from the theme again.)

Well, the topic of regional production has come up and I thought I'd put my two cents worth in. (ed. with a 49% top-up.)

Regional production is when the CTF encourages (ed. forces) producers to produce outside the traditional hubs of Toronto, Montreal and Vancouver. What the original intent was (ed. oh, oh, don't use the diversity card!) to make sure stories get told from other parts of the country instead of the big cities. Not too long ago most Canadian television came out of Toronto. Now, I come from Halifax and when I started working in television I went away to where it was happening. That's where the work was. So I went. And I was cool with that. I was really sick of the attitude that the government should financially back companies and industries with cash and tax credits to relocate here. A lot of them did and once the money was spent, they were gone. A lot of money went down the crapper.

(ed. back to the tv thing!)

So, the concept that CTF would fund productions in other areas has worked (ed. Oh crap. You don't want to say that.) Really, Halifax has two full professional crews that work practically year round. All the resources are available here; production equipment, props houses etc. Was it a good idea to force this on the business? That's debatable (ed. Don't start a debate or I'll close this blog down!)

But years ago, Canadian TV was Wayne and Shuster, Front Page Challange, Bizarre, Stars on Ice (ed. WTF?"), ENG, Traders, Street Legal, Hi Diddle Day etc. All out of Toronto. If it wasn't for the CTF policy, we wouldn't have Corner Gas, Trailer Park Boys, 22 Minutes, Little Mosque on the Prarie. Or would we have something better?

Are producers and writers being punished for living and working in the "centres"? Yes and no. They're missing out on one source of funding, but they have access to a the network of broadcasters; all the decisions are all still made in Toronto. Outside Toronto, we refer to the pitching exercise as the $1,000 cup of coffee.

But it may be time to loosen the reins; after all, relocating a production and crew 151 miles outside of Toronto really doesn't help anything. Also, a lot of "centre" productions become "regional" productions when a Toronto producer partners with a Nova Scotian ("Shattered City") or New Brunswick producer. This means the production gets shot here and the regional producer gets a fee and credit for sitting back and doing nothing. A crew gets hired but the industry hardly develops.

So that's all I'm going to type on the subject. Carl brought me a DVD of "The Incredible Mr. Limpit" so I'm going to watch that now. night.

CBC Ditches Headquarters for a Little Mosque

2007-05-30T22:00:00.000-03:00

Not really,

But the CBC came out with their fall programming today to nobody's surprise but them! They seemed especially exuberant.

"In a glitzy afternoon ceremony presided over by host George Stroumboulopoulos (can this guy be any better spokesperson for exuberance!) and peppered with the broadcaster's most famous faces,

(Mr. Dress-up, Bruno Gerussi, the Air Farce and other dead celebs?) the CBC unveiled a raft of programming — both brand new and returning shows — scheduled to hit the airwaves beginning this fall.

Little Mosque on the Prairie, (CBC has ordered 212 episodes, not really, they ordered 20 which is a huge commitment, not seen since the King of Kensington. Good or bad, discuss. They usually order six-packs so this is unusual).

The high-energy presentation (Really? This is CBC remember!) kicked off with a nod to the CBC's recent runaway hit, (eh, okay "runaway." remember we're all shareholders, happy thoughts, happy thoughts). Little Mosque on the Prairie, which was given the heady title of "saviour of the CBC" and is one of next season's highlights. (okay......)

Other programs set for sophomore seasons include crime drama Intelligence, (surprise! Oh what the hell more exclamation marks, !!!) the entrepreneur-based reality show Dragon's Den (it is cute) and a language-related edition of the quiz show Test the Nation. (and this is fun. But a lot of that is Wendy Mesley, ummmm)

Though many criticized the public broadcaster's entrance into the world of reality programming, the audience has warmed to it, said Kirstine Layfield, CBC-TV's executive director of network programming.

'Audiences saw that we weren't going to this kind of weird, Extreme Makeover plastic-surgery place (um, unless Peter Mansbridge counts) … they understand we're doing this with a purpose.'

—Kirstine Layfield, CBC-TV "It was hard for people to understand what reality TV was in the world of CBC," she said Tuesday afternoon. ('cept she said she didn't want to see any more proposals from east coast, those dark comedy people. Redundancy alert! (but that's were where Rick Mercer and 22 Minutes come from.) East coast is more to the right on the big pink map than Quebec))

Current affairs and entertainment show The Hour, hosted by Stroumboulopoulos, comedy hits like Rick Mercer Report, (lifer) long-running drama Coronation Street (money maker; if only CBC could come up with something like this. Oh, right they tried but failed cause they didn't understand that story and characters were important. But that was the previous administration. Where is Fred Nickoloidous? Hopefully off doing nothing which, I know...) and David Suzuki's venerable The Nature of Things (does Suzuki have pictures of someone with a german shepard or does he just rip his clothes off everytime they have a meeting to cancel him?) are among other returning favourites.

Flagship newscast The National will be added to CBC-TV's expanding slate of high-definition programming, joining documentary specials and hockey broadcasts. (Um, outside of Toronto and Alberta, nobody cares)

The upcoming talent search Triple Sensation will see competitors who must excel at acting, singing and dancing.

"We didn't follow any of those judging gimmicks," said actress Cynthia Dale, who joins Garth Drabinsky as one of the show's five judges.

(okay, anything with Cynthia Dale; I'm in. She is an accomplished actress, stage screen etc; but I still hope to stumble across that movie she made where she was the fitness instructor in competition back in the eigthies. Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, can sweat and maintain her poise like this lady!)

"We have to try things that are different. We can't just make Canadian versions of American shows. (And we shouldn't. Because we can't do it! And we actually have our own identity. sigh, I stop now.)

We have to make things that are truly our own." (But as Barrie Dunn, one of the maestros behind Trailer Park Boys said, "You should take a risk")(sic)"

So that's all I have to say about the CBC.

Time to check the stock price of DHX, the masterminds behind 22 MInutes, Lunar Jim, Poko etc. If you're into Canadian TV for anything but profit, move along. I have to check and see how my 1000 shares are doing. Excuse me for a minute. (I really am minimizing to check the stock price, so hold on)

(Elevator Music)

We're aT $1.48 which isn't so bad considering my cost, nothing. (inheiretence) But I do feel bad for the board of directors who were granted:

Sir Graham Day, Director 100,000 $2.25
Granted to J. William Ritchie, Director 100,000 $2.25
Granted to Joe Medjuck, Director 100,000 $2.25
Granted to Donald Wright, Director 100,000 $2.25
Granted to Dana Landry, CFO 322,500 $2.25
Granted to Employees 24,047 $2.25
Well, they didn't actually "buy in" like they used their own money.

Although I've theoretically lost money since my inheiritence, these millionaires have lost...well nothing. Prices are down and their shares were essentially free so basically they're just losing ...gravy they never had before.

And Dana Landry borrowed money to buy his shares so... is it just me or do rich people risk nothing to gain more money?

Guess it's just me.

Ouch, too bad the stocks at $1.48 but I think this shows confidence!

But I know my fellow potential shareholedrs will appreciate the following Kinks!

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WTF?

2007-05-28T21:46:00.000-03:00

The last week has been a series of up's and downs here in the apartment. My sister's exchange student tenant/boyfriend, Carl, has vanished. Into thin air. I know the word "literally" is overused by the media but in this case...

Now I know Carl grew up in the jungles of Brazil and probably knows how to vanish into the underbrush at the first sign of danger from a McCaw or whatever, but he was living here with us in southend Halifax (ed. some would say that's jungle like).

Okay, but when you're fleeing for your life you don't grab the the big screen HD tv and DVD/VCR player with you when you scurry into the underbrush! Crap, I even suspected this was going to happen and put windchimes on the suckers. Not a tinkle.

Sigh.

So here I sit with my sister Stella, who's constantly complaining about the infarction in her leg, whatever that is, watching basic cable on a puny 27" screen that I'm sure even the natives in Borneo would scoff at, especially during world cup!

Anyhoo, I was happy to see that my stock in DHX (Halifax Film Company) has gone up.
My 1000 shares are now worth $1.65 each! But, then I found this little notice hidden away after all the 3rd quarter "parade of happiness".

"Wednesday May 16, 11:33 am ET

In press release c9498 sent today at 2:00e, errors occurred in the column headings of the Consolidated Statements of Operations and Deficit and the Consolidated Statements of Cash Flows, as well as in Notes (number sign) 6, 13, 14 and 15 of the Notes to Consolidated Financial Statements. They all reference "three-months ended", but the last two columns on the far right should read "nine-months ended". Corrected copy follows:"

Oh, that's okay. Mistakes will happen. I once put a quarter in the parking meter next to mine. So for 25 cents, a neighbourfriend (ed. friend you don't know) gets a freebie. Good for him.

But really, this is like, sorry officer, I thought I was doing 100 kms but apparently I was doing 200 million!

Do the people putting these figures together for the Toronto and London stock exchange realize that this is important?

Now I don't know much about the number crunching but if anyone were to stay awake while reading the financial statements (I haven't slept well in a long time, anyway), they would notice that the income/revenue that were trumpeted so highly for three months were actually for nine months. Sorta like your girlfriend, saying "that was Fantastic!!!", but she meant "wow, that was okay, considering the time involved, you know ....." The ....'s are her's, you know how they trail off. ...

I'll Buy You Pearls, Now Please!

2007-05-23T21:16:00.000-03:00

Well, it's been a busy couple of days. Eloise is here trying to comfort my sister Stella. She's been crying ever since her Brazilian boyfriend stormed out of here last night.

I was in the other room so I don't know what happened but apparently she wasn't all that fond of a present he gave her. Since my divorce, I've realized it's a mug's game trying to figure out women. Actually, it was before that but that's when I gave up trying.

But why she would be upset because he gave her a pearl necklace? I guess she was sleeping at the time but I'm seeing the only breach of etiquete was his timing.

Anyway, we haven't seen him since and the apartment is full of crying women.

But my stock is down $ .03. I have a thousand shares so I'm losing...some cash. Should I be worried? Maybe I should cash in and buy that Daredevil #1 they have at Strange Adventures. That can't be worse than gambling my future on this stupid stock market.

Symbol Last Trade $ Change % Change Volume Exchange*
DHX 1.450 +0.000 +0.00 6,800 T

And sorry DHX, not DMX as in my previous blogs. My mistake and I hope not a lot of you bought shares in Demi-Morbid Xcruciating Films. Probably, you might want to sell them before the authorities show up at your door.

I Own Halifax Film Company!

2007-05-21T17:53:00.000-03:00

Well, not quite but I am a shareholder. For once in my life I own something of value. (ed. apparently Pez dispensers are not considered currency in many places.)

After extensive research I've discovered that not only were my previous blogs unobjective and unfair they were just plain mean.

Halifax Film Company has created hundreds of jobs for animators who toil away like asian tailors doing what they love to do; animate. Why if it wasn't for this company these kids would be out creating grafetti and making things move excrutiatingly slow.

And as far as me, criticizing the company for not donating to charity or providing scholarships to people who can't afford to go to "stop-motion school" or whatever the hell they call it; remember people it's called SHOW BUSINESS! If you can't play by the rules, maybe you shouldn't be playing the game.

And I'm not saying this just because I own 1000 shares in DMX (Halifax Film Company). Call me a selfish hypocrite if you want.

Go ahead, I'll wait.

So now, let's talk about me. I've been reading up on investments, via internet research (ed. Is there any other kind?) and I've pieced together my net worth, projections and, um, integrated cash/value ratio. Okay, so, I'm not really a numbers guy.

But I went to the DMX quarterly report and found this:

"- Revenues for the third quarter ended March 31, 2007 increased over 216%
from the same period of 2006;
- The number of delivered half-hours of production increased 97% to 33.
from 17 in the same period of 2006.

Michael Donovan, Chairman and CEO, commented,

"We continue to deliver on our strategy. During the quarter, we were pleased to have launched several new series and closed two significant merchandising and licensing deals. We anticipate continued growth across our four strategic drivers, being increasing merchandising & licensing revenue, expanding the television and film library, leveraging our international distribution capabilities and exploiting new content platforms." "

I'm not sure what my fellow shareholder Michael Donovan said but it all sounds upbeat. He could be talking about widgets but really people, is enteratinment in this country no better than quantity per dollar anyway? I think that's what God would want.

And note to Michael: The number of hours of programming generated; can we pump that production out a bit faster people!

Here's some more financials:

"The growth in revenue included a 66% organic increase to $2.510 million in proprietary production... "

I don't get most of this financial mumbo jumbo but look; we're a money maker and we're organic! So shut up.

And as my grandfather always said "invest in land, cause they ain't making it any more" !

"Acquisitions

During the nine-month period ended March 31, 2007, the following
acquisitions occurred:

(a) On July 1, 2006 (the "Effective Date"), the Company completed a
business acquisition and acquired all of the issued and
outstanding shares of Electropolis Studios Incorporated for cash
consideration of $31,852."

Does this mean I own part of a soundstage? On the Halifax waterfront? This has got to be worth millions! Smart shopping!

And we own something else:

"(e) On April 7, 2006 (the "Effective Date"), the Company acquired all of the issued and outstanding shares of Funny Farm Productions Limited, a film production company for cash consideration of $90,073."

I'll have to google that; never heard of it. But I'm sure its valuable! (ed. culturally speaking, you mean?"

And we own this:

"$0.245 million-1 half-hour for the pilot of The Truth About"

Um, never heard of it. But, we own this:

"On April 7, 2006 (the Effective Date), The Company acquired all of the issued and outstanding shares of Boy Girl Productions Canada Limited ("Boy Girl"), a film production company for cash consideration of $128,719."

Um, I did google this but I'm hoping it has nothing to do with the website that turned up. Freaks!

And we own this:

"On May 19, 2006, the Company acquired all of the issued and outstanding shares of Decode Entertainment Inc. ("Decode"), a television production company, for the total consideration of $17,961,095."

Yeah! Shake your money maker!

But here's more:

"Along with further penetration of the Decode library, (ed. this sounds naughty!) the distribution team has been able to successfully place more than 20 titles from the Company's current production slate and library in multiple territories throughout the world."

Dollars, pesos, rubles, bring it on!

"the Company has over 55 half-hours of contracted proprietary programs,
made up of 9 different episodic television series, which are scheduled for
delivery. "

Oh yeah, talk to papa! You know when they talk about television in these terms it just sounds more entertaining. And isn't that what we're all after folks!

Are we liquid? I feel liquid!

"4 Amounts receivable

Trade 12,079,642
Income taxes receivable 135,606
Goods and services taxes recoverable 388,569
Federal and provincial film tax credits
and other government assistance 22,115,876
Due from an officer and director 250,000

Check out that Gov't "assistance". Assist me Stephen! Ahhahahahahahaaa! But, excuse me, who the hell owes us $250,000? Can we not get our ducks in a row?!

And here are my fellow shareholders (actually onlt potential shareholders are listed here but I'm sure they have the sense God gave them and already own shares):

"c. Summary of options and warrants

Options

Granted to Sir Graham Day, Director 100,000 $2.25
Granted to J. William Ritchie, Director 100,000 $2.25
Granted to Joe Medjuck, Director 100,000 $2.25
Granted to Donald Wright, Director 100,000 $2.25
Granted to Dana Landry, CFO 322,500 $2.25
Granted to Employees 24,047 $2.25

Ouch, too bad the stocks at $1.48 but I think this show confidence!

Gosh, I can't wait till the next shareholder's meeting. I'm sure there will be the usual official meeting with the proles, but afterwards some of the more prominant shareholders will retire to the Halifax Club for cognac, cosmopolitans and cigars.

Being recognized not just as an ordinary shareholder but as a voice of television's cultural side (having offered several jokes to my friends at America's Funniest Videos), I will be invited to join them.

I can picture us in the main room: me, Michael Donovan, Charles "the Green Arrow" Bishop, Dana "money guy" Landry and Bill "whoever he is" Ritchie. We're all sharing bon mots back and forth. "Oh, no more reparte for me, thanks", I say, "I'm full". The others chuckle.

It's been a good day.

On to the the Golden Shower for God's Sake!

2007-05-21T16:33:00.000-03:00

My sister Stella and her Brazillian exchange student boyfriend have been arguing all day. He wants to go out and buy things (Hey Carl, Different Strokes is on DVD.) but Stella wants to go to my Aunt's 50th anniversary shower, which I believe is the Golden one, I think.

It was fifty years ago today that her intended husband Ted, ran from the alter; literally he ran. Tragic at the time, my Aunt soon considered it a sign from God as Ted went on to rob a bank and spend most of the rest of his life on the lamb (ed. an odd thing to ride, especially if the authorities are chasing you.)

Anyway my Aunt Trisha never married and celebrates her close call every year with family and friends. And as I cannot leave the apartment, it's up to Stella to go and enjoy tiny sandwiches and cheese with flavourings in them.

I just want them both out of the apartment so I can read my book "Investing in Canada for Dummies."

I've come into 1000 shares of DMX (Halifax Film Company) and I want to be able to figure what to do with them

Should I keep the shares hoping that the returns will comfort me in my old age, or should I cash in now and buy that "The Hills Have Eyes" original movie poster (with lobby cards) that I've had my eye on?

Bits and Bites

2007-05-19T08:28:00.000-03:00

Just have to toss off a few things here:

- CBC has cancelled the Gil Deacon Show. This was a feel-good chat show devoted to crafts and feelings aimed at women over the age of fifty on high dosages of anti-depressants. It will be replaced by Hinterland Who's Who's Greatest Hits.

- The local newspaper reported that Shaun Majumder will be one of the stars of a new show for Fox. (See my posting for April 6 for the long-winded details)

- People have commented that I seem to be picking on Halifax Film Company (aka DMX) and that will stop. Apparently they think I'm some sort of hippy who cares more about culture than money. I'd rather not blog if people think I'm being unfair.

- the CRTC is unleashing the advertising chains from broadcasters. Currently limited to 14 minutes per hour, by 2008, Canadian networks can have as much advertising as they sell. Can we get TIVO in Canada?

- I love horror films. Let me clarify that. I love scary films and not torturing humans with power tools, films. I just watched Hush, Hush, Sweet Charlotte,
Sure a fake decapitation but no close-ups of sharp things going into peoples eyes. If only there were more scary, entertaining films but I feel there are none coming soon. Scary Stuff.

- Oh, and I just found out that I've been left 1,000 shares of DMX (Halifax Film Company) stock in a will.

So that's all for now on the state of TV in Canada.

I Need a Little Break

2007-05-18T22:26:00.000-03:00

This blog's been getting a bit too serious lately so I'll take a break for a video from The Syle Council.

And a little Stewie

Symbol Last Trade $ Change
DHX 1.460 +0.010 +0.69

DHX's 3rd Quarter report was released today. Looked through the stuff but couldn't see how much they contributed to charity or how many young filmmakers they've helped finance calling cards for. Must be there, somewhere.

The Office!!!!

2007-05-17T22:01:00.000-03:00

Brilliant, brilliant brilliant!

I think I've seen most of The Office this year and I just watched the season finale. Steve Carrell of course is dynamite as is the rest of the cast. Favourite scenes:

- Jan and Michael on the drive away from the office after she's been led away by security from her job.

- Jim finds Pam's note.

- Jim and Pam on the beach immediately after.

- when Pam is talking to the camera in the conference room and Jim pops in to ask her to dinner, she says yes,and he leaves. The look on her face, the smile, the eyes...this is one brilliant actress. (ed. Get well soon!)

- but the absolute favourite is the ending when the head guy in New York is welcoming aboard the winner of the job that everyone's been applying for. I thought, he's on the phone to an unknown person and this is the cliffhanger until next year. But then they cut to the intern on the other end of the phone! he's getting the job! (ed. should we issue some sort of spoiler alert?)

The camera's close up on him and his "girlfriend" is sitting in the background. When he's done with the phone call she asks him "who was that?" He looks at us with a smile and says to her "we're done".

Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant!!!

The latest share prices for DHX, i.e. the company formed when Halifax Film Company acquired Decode:

Share Price:

Symbol Last Trade $ Change %Change Volume
DHX 1.450 -0.030 -2.03 5 1,308

Contributions to the tv film community:

DHX 0.00

More Canadian TV

2007-05-16T21:38:00.000-03:00

Watched a few more clips of 22 minutes on-line. "The Mom Show" and a "Homeless Expose". Both pretty funny. What I like is that they got their point across quickly and they did it in a funny way. Much better than the last SNL I saw a few years ago where they just came out with a "crazy" character and bit the limp premise to death for the next 8 minutes.

If I reallign my treatment time just right I may be able to watch a whole episode of 22. Now I'm intrigued.

Nova Scotia TV Lottery

2007-05-16T18:25:00.000-03:00

The big news being discussed over the TV blog-o-sphere (ed. blog-a-verse?, world-o-blog?) is the release of the schedules for the big networks in the states. Most decisions about what shows come back and those that don't, are made from a financial standpoint. (ed. and here?)

It must be getting harder and harder for the money people down there to figure out which shows stay and go. They have to factor in ratings with advertiser dollars, the rising costs of production, money from second windows and the great unpredictable, possible motherload, of DVD sales down the road. As long as they leave Cops alone, I'm okay. Why mess with success?

At least the rise in second plays on channels like USA, A&E etc, plus money from DVD sales have resulted in a the networks spending money on quality productions. Plus they finally clued in that if they put on crappy shows people were going to go to the other 499 channels.

It's not like in the day when you had to choose between Love Boat, Dukes of Hazzard and The Kallikaks. (ed. the who?) And there was no Blockbuster.

It's true, kids, listen to grampy.

But that's all I'm going to say on that topic. Today it's time to focus on the Nova Scotia TV industry. (ed. Yes, Virginia there is one)

The final, absolute last, official listing of money spent by the CTF on Canadian TV for the 2006/07 fiscal year, came out today. (ed. Tah Da! Fab!) But not like that.

Anyway the winner in Nova Scotia is the Halifax Film Company which received
$4,068,482 dollars of taxpayer dollars (ed. no! its from the CBC! Well, their envelope anyway, actually it came from the gov't and begrudgingly from cable company operators).

Most of the money was for kids shows Lunar Jim, Jungle Jim (ed. theme?) and Animal Jim, sorry, Animal Mechanicals. All from the mind of Jeff Rosen who years ago predicted the worlds fascination with Pirates by putting huge paper mache heads on people and having them flay their arms about as if they were talking to each other.

Also, This Hour is in there for about $400K.

(ed. Halifax film raised $20M through a share offering and is set to receive $1M in assistance from the province of Nova Scotia in payroll rebates plus $$$ from the province in tax credits and Nova Scotia Films Development money.)

Anyone want to make a shaky cam video about vampires for a BravoFact grant? My sister said we can borrow her betacam and a friend of mine has some fake fangs.

But I promised not to pick on millionairre lawyers leaving crumbs for the latest crop of aspiring Stephen Spielbergs. Go to Toronto if you want to make "filims"! you creative non-bottom line losers!

Other Nova Scotian productions (ed. for the rest of you cfa's, this doesn't stray outside the province so you might as well hit the knitting blog) include something called "Go Deep". Now unless this is a Friday night Showcase show, its probably yet another documentary about ships that have sailed. (ed. and sunk! At least show us a skeleton or two. Or have a bikini clad diver/explorer on board. Remember the poster for The Deep? Va va voom!)

There's Delilah and Julius for Teletoon in which local producers Collideascope are doing the grunt work for Decode. Decode was puchased by Halifax Film Company last year. (ed. okay, let it go. You're sounding like some sort of conspiracy nut!)

The last one on the list is Trailer Park Boys. Their CTF contribution is.............$2,771,704.

$2,771,704.

Math time.

Now I don't know if this represents the 20% License top up fee or the equity investment or a combination of both. I've read all the mind-numbing CTF Guidelines until my latest cosmopolitan hit it mark.

If it's 20% then the budget would be

$2,771,704/.2 = $13,858,000 which would be rediculous.

Let's say the license fee/equity combination is 35% of the budget. Fair enough?

$2,771,704/.35 = $7,919,514

Hell, that can't be right. Let's use 50%

$2,771,704/.5 = $5,543,000 (rounding)

Um, so that would mean that each episode of the 10 episode season would cost $554,300 each.

Um...

You all have seen Trailer Park boys, right?

Methinks this year, Bubbles get's his own furlined trailer with a golden hooker.

Hey, Michael Donovan, stop smirking.

My Missing Agent

2007-05-15T23:31:00.000-03:00

About an hour ago, i got off the phone after re-connecting with my agent who I haven't heard from in fifteen years. I stopped calling him because I heard he was dead, but he tells me everything's fine and that he was just waiting for the perfect project for me.

All he could tell me on the phone is that the project is a South Korean-Czech co-production with Russian oil money behind it for the European market. Jetix is the distributor. It's an animated show about a couple of crimefighters/mystery solvers/zany kung-fu fighters called "Minty Mouse" and his sidekick "Mossy Conundrum".

Now I'm hoping that between Howard's accent and the,probably, multiple translations that happened, these are not the proper names.

Anyway, Howard is going to e-mail me the bible but I shan't wait up tonight for it. I remember him fumbling for ten minutes to dial a phone with his pork sausage size fingers; I can't picture them moving swiftly around a keyboard.

Skipping House Tonight

2007-05-14T21:05:00.000-03:00

I started to write this entry this morning at 8:04 A.M. I know the exact time because the fetal alcohol teen from up the hall starts screaming at that exact time each day. I can pretty well track his progress of having breakfast, dressing, Lunar Jim, then he walks down the hallway, banging his head against the wall every 2.5 seconds on his way to the short bus. I wish I could keep a regular schedule.

Anyway, Carl went out and bought a new VCR/DVD player for the apartment. I almost kissed my sister's Brazillian. I'm going to tape shows from now on and watch them at my leisure. Hello 20th Century!

My sister Stella's been whining and limping around the house lately; a visit to the doctor revealed she has an "infarction" whatever that is and how you get it, I don't know.

She and Carl were supposed to start school today but apparently her pain and his lack of initiative prevented them from going. So they lounged around, all day watching a four DVD special package of Mexican cartoons they bought at Wal-Mart.

My friend Wendall came over and, as we played computer monopoly in the bedroom, he told me about another friend who was involved in a charity called Performing Arts Lodge. Apparently its an old age home for actors. They had a fundraiser and tried to get donations from the local production community.

Now when I was involved in the community, here and elsewhere, (ed. old fart alert!) the community was pretty tight and we helped each other out all the time. (You need a sound guy for a day? I've done sound. I've got 20 feet of film leftover if you want it, that kind of thing.) But that appears to have gone by the wayside.

They tried to get the Halifax Film Company to donate, but apparently on none of their telephones can they dial out to return calls and their e-mail system does not include a "reply" button.

I remember when I was a member of the Atlantic Filmmakers co-op it became a running gag trying to get Salter Street Films (Michael Donovan's first company) to donate services, guidance, money, day old muffins. They were just too busy spending their LFP/CTF, NSFDC money (that's taxpayer money, folks). It was just too taxing to have to deal with "filmmakers" and their ilk.

(Though I do remember crashing one of Salter Street's Christmas parties. Rick Mercer made me a cosmopolitan which is still MY drink. Really all-round nice guy. But I ate so much shrimp, puked in Bill Niven's office. That guy's a class act. I knew he was pissed but he was still gracious. Not so much, and understandably so, after I puked again over his new Christmas sweater. You can never get the essence of regurgitated shrimp out of wool.)

Now I give Michael Donovan credit, he did win an oscar and he was one of the first, if not the first, to get the tv and film industry up and running from nothing in this province. But let's set up some scholarships, mentorships or something to encourage young talent. "Let my people go!" (ed. Totally inappropriate quote.)

Enough about that (ed. stop talking about people who have worked hard and forgotten to give back to the community that gave them so much.)

As you can see, I now have an editor to try and keep me on track with this blog. Fair enough...Wendall!

I haven't watched much Canadian TV since Saturday (actually I did watch a clip of 22 Minutes from their website and it was pretty good. This new guy Gavin Crawford is pretty funny. But I couldn't find any clips of Greg Thomey. Where is he? This part is way too long for brackets.) but I'll try this week.

Meanwhile my interest in Mexican cartoons has wained. They all seem to be about wrestling. So I'm just looking out the window to collect my thoughts. (ed. you would need a tiny little bucket.)

As I look at the bus stop across the street I can't help but think that after a certain age and/or poundage women should not wear those low riser jeans. And no man should ever wear them

Also, white people should never, ever have dreadlocks. I know you feel cool but you really just look stupid. (and I know that girl from 10, but she had more than cornrows to look at.)

Saturday Night

2007-05-12T21:09:00.000-03:00

Love that Flaggpole Sitta song (see previous blogs for the coolest unofficial video)

Anyway, things have calmed down here significantly. Carl starts summer school at St. Mary's on Monday, he's taking a commerce/drama/engineering mixture. Apparently his mother wants him to be well-rounded. I guess!

But it brings back memories of my days (and nights) at St. Mary's; the Gorsebrook Lounge, the drinking contests, the drunken dances. And of course the learning parts, which will always remain with me, no matter how much I try to forget.

So quick and dirty update:

- my sister, Stella, has decided to go back to school. Previously an arts major (incomplete) she wants to take a commerce/drama/engineering.... yeah, okay we can see where this is going. I constantly have to move my La-z-boy recliner so I don't have to watch Stella and Carl make goo-goo eyes at each other reflected in the big screen tv.

Okay, I promised quick and dirty;

- Per my commitment to watch more Canadian TV, I was tuned into CBC last night when a show called "The Choir Boys Gang" came on. The first fifteen minutes were, mostly a standard set-up. Choirboys, who are supposed to represent goodness are actually bad. Okay, got it. Let the comedy ensue. But not only do they act like boys their age they go beyond that, putting LSD on communion wafers.

The only saving grace was Andy Jones as the priest, who happens to be questioning his faith the same day. After he eats the wafer in front of the congregation, I was expecting to see wackiness and embarassment but Andy played it low key and it worked. He appeared befuddled but no one was the wiser and he just walked away and ended up in the graveyard asking a vison of Jesus a lot of religeous questions.

Jesus's response was to run and hide behind tombstones.

It was written by Norm Hiscock who I think was a stand-up in Canada years ago and went to the states to work on the Roseanne show. So I think I'll give this show another try.

The odd thing was that I had never heard of this show existing, in development, coming etc. Oh, wait, CBC fired all it's publicity people last year.

- Also watched G-Spot again, This is like "Sex in the City" if "Sex in the City" was funny and not stupid and smarmy. I like this show and the girls...as charactesr.

- Watched Bliss. This is only the second time I've watched this show and either I saw a repeat or its the same all the time. It was about a girl who lives her life in her apartment with an operational web-cam and people watch her do everyday stuff and get naked. (Though the two are not mutually exclusive.) But I'll save you the trouble of watching it by writing a summary. "She" has brought a new boyfriend back for sex.

He: So people watch you do, like everyday stuff, all the time? Even naked?

She: Sure. (though, they're not mutually exclusiv). I want you to do it with me.

He: No. And I don't want you to do it.

She: I'm doing it.

After 10-15 minutes of individual soul-searching, he's naked in front of the camera when she enters.

She: You're doing it?

He: Yes, and I want you to do it with me.

She: No. And I'm not going to do it anymore.

k. I missed a Family Guy re-run for this.

Time to log off as Carl and Stella are making noises on the couch behind me. Guess I'll go into the bedroom and watch the non-cable channels really loud.

If only I could leave the apartment.

The Man in Back.

2007-05-09T22:27:00.000-03:00

My sister Stella and our resident exchange student, Carl, took my dog, Biscuitface, out for his nightly walk so I have time to blog.

Off and on, Im still reading my book about Johnny Cash. A few things I've learned; he was called "The Man in Back" because growing up, his church was crowded and he had a big family so he always offered to stand...in the back.

Other questions were resolved in a dramatic fashion:

Q. Johnny, why were you in prison?

A. Never was.

Q. Why do you always wear black?

A. I don't.

These were real questions he addressed in the book (I may have to re-address the back/black thing). Although I'm not one for celebrity gossip, I find myself flipping ahead for some sort of dramatic revelations.

Meanwhile, I received an e-mail from my agent. I bring this up because it's astounding for several reasons.

#1 I thought he was dead.

I sent a sympathy card and everything. And that was fifteen years ago when he was over 100 years old!

But apparently, he's still alive and living in his birth house in East Vancouver. Even when I visited him back then, I don't think reality had caught up with him. (Whenever he heard the term "crack house" he always giggled thinking it a rude term for something else.)

As my fervent readers know, I used to write a lot of childrens tv back in the day. But I gave that up when my ideas started being rejected as "too old." The final straw came when a Vancouver producer told me after I submitted a first draft for a Bart Simpson-esque show, that I was out of the loop.

"The dialogue is too Bart Simpson-ish."

I was flabergasted. (And up to this point only my grandmother ever been flabergasted in our family. But Ireland, at the time did not consider that illegal or even in bad taste.)

Ummmm, how do I respond to this? The debate was between "wanna eat and goddamn common sense basic writing". But my cable bill was due so I said "tell me how to make it better" and my internal voice continued "oh great one who wouldn't know story, if story came up to you wearing a sign saying "hi, I'm story" and bit you on the ass!"

But she then fired me and gave the script to her "right-hand man" of a story editor. (Who later stabbed her in the back which was bad, but who would I root for there?)

So, I never had the opportunity to incorporate her "notes" and only got paid for the first draft. I thought at the time,"my bad" which was a popular saying at the time.

Then a year later, I'm watching TV and the show in question comes on and dammit; they're airing my episode. Well, as a writer, this is a perfect opportunity for me to learn where I went wrong by studying the changes made to the script I wrote.

And I watched slackjawed.

Nothing had been changed from my first draft.

Who do I call; the producer? The Broadcaster? Telefilm? My Mother?

Aw, life.

But maybe my agent, is back in the game and inviting me to play again. What the hell, I've got nothing but time.

Brazil 2, Parrots 0

2007-05-08T21:28:00.000-03:00

Carl, our Brazilian exchange student, had new furniture delivered to our apartment today. From the La-z-boy store! Now, as much as I'm against pronouncing "z" as "zee" I cannot complain about new rocker recliners with massage built in. The Americans can have the last letter of the alphabet for all I care.

And seeing as it was warm today, we all decided to have a bar-b-que on the balcony but I don't think we should have let Carl do it. His idea of a bar-b-que was to light a pile of old furniture on fire. The footstool was okay, but the couch smoked a lot.

He decided, as a "treat", to cook the second parrot he brought from Brazil with him and share it with us. Like the other, it seemed resigned to its fate of being bludgoned. Stoic, it didn't make a peep. Those ice flow protestors would have been beside themselves.

I was especially impressed when I saw the look in it's eyes, as Carl wailed away on it with a rolling pin; it seemed to say "is that all you've got?"

Anyway, the bird was not actually a parrot according to my sister Stella's translation, it was apparently a rare "Shlumpvee" or something like that. Apparently there's not many left in the jungles of Brazil and I can understand why, they are delicious!

It's Tuesday night and as promised I'm trying to catch up on my Canadian TV. I always try to watch George S. on The Hour but sometimes his bobbing and weaving image on the big screen plays havoc on my vertigo after a few cosmopolitans.

Health Care Alert! And "The G-Spot". (The TV show)

2007-05-07T19:43:00.000-03:00

I thought I would pass along a warning about a dangerous entity that may be in your house!

Last night as I was watching The Simpsons with Carl and Stella, I was enjoying a (okay, several) cosmopoliton(s). As usual, to maximise the enjoyment, I was using my vintage Underdog swirly straw. As I was imbibing, I realized my drink tasted "funny". I drank from the glass and it was okay, so maybe the straw...

When I held the straw up to the light and looked inside, I was horrified. There was mold in there! And it was on the straight part!. I shuddered to imagine what lurked in the twisty turns of the straw. And, with a backpack full of regret, I made the decision to cut it open. I had to see.

What I found in there would make the Black Death seem palatable. I haven't been sick but this mould may be the kind that grows and slowly suffocates you from the inside out. The logical part of my brain tells me, I'll be all right but the emotional side... my imagination is a curse.

I try to make my mind think of other things. Like the show G-Spot I watched the other night. It was actually pretty funny and the sex scenes were done in quite good taste, I thought. Though I think they must have Cg'd the bobsled guy, and they overdid it at that.

But overall another funny Canadian show. Now I'm going to check my vintage lunchboxes. i can't remember ever opening my Partridge Family box after I finished the tenth grade. And I always had tuna.

Yippee KiYa Mom!

2007-05-06T10:07:00.000-03:00

This is good. The best of Die Hard with a theme song and a sneak peak at Die Hard 4?

Small, Small, World

2007-05-05T21:34:00.000-03:00

So I'm enjoying Patton on the big screen TV that Carl bought for the apartment (and George C., we all know the oscar was not worthy enough, that's why ) when during the tank part, there's a ruckus in the bedroom. My sister Stella went in there with our exchange student Carl to watch a renovating show or something on our old TV, when she exploded into the living room.

I tried to stay focused on the movie but soon gave up. Carl and Stella have been spending a lot of time together, she's trying to aclimatize her Brazillian to Halifax, but this is the first time I've heard an altercation. She came out yelling at him, "be more careful because I hate facials!" Now, to me, I can't see how one person can suddenly surprise another with a skin care treatment, and I can't see how this would upset them so; aloe doesn't even sting! But I've been accused of taking Carl's side before, so I'm staying out of it.

As they've ruined the movie for me I'm checking the old blog and thought I would answer a question or two. I don't usually allow comments because, well frankly I don' care.

And I usually ignore questions because other peoples questions about the things I'm un-naturally obsessed with, strike me as stupid. But what the hell, it's Saturday night so I'll open up the floor.